I've bolded what applies to me. Which isn't very helpful in determining position of SO in the stacking because I relate to almost everything in the SOC description as well as the stuff in the SOC blind spot.
I'll die happy once I've figured out my stacking for sure. (not literally).

Quote Originally Posted by silke View Post
SOC Instinct

~ ability to adapt behavior [e.g. high adaptability to others in conversation]
~ beginning place of altruism -- as animals became more complex, the young needing longer care, a need arose for an instinct that could override sp to ensure the survival of one's children even if one loses one's own life
~ soc is subjectively experienced as caring ("giving a damn")
~ play (for fun) (or flirting in case of romantic play) [e.g. playful banter]
~ acceptance, interested in who others really are [acknowledgement of others]
~ awareness of the other -- compared with sx awareness of the energy between two people, soc brings awareness of the other as themselves, as a person in their own right -- and of how one's self and the other are affecting each other
~ soc brings a certain humility because of the sense of interdependence. less overestimating the relative importance of one individual self
~ soc decides what we say "yes" vs. "no" to socially, it's how we read situations and people and decide where to invest
~ most communication is soc (except for territorial (sp) and mating (sx))
~ cited a study in which the biggest factor for longevity was friendship
~ bonds between species (e.g. humans and pets) are examples of soc instinct
~ one way of looking at all the major spiritual teachings are as an expansion of the soc instinct; ultimately, including all life within the soc instinct's movement toward win-win
~ under ego distortion, the soc instinct is involved in war, group dominance - though those are soc in combination with sp (survival/greed) and/or sx (competition). straight-up/undistorted soc instinct is always win-win.

SOC areas:

~ reading people and adapting behavior
➙ sp wants other stuff to adapt to the self; soc is willing to adapt self in light of others' needs
as an example, suppose you feel the room is too hot and you see a thermostat on the wall. sp just turns down the thermostat, but soc gauges others' temperature - if everyone else in the room is dressed lightly, soc does not turn down the thermostat.

~ bonding, affiliating, communicating / creating connection
➙ attraction is sx, but creating and maintaining bonds/relationship is soc
marriage is primarily soc

~ contribution and participation.
➙we're wired to contribute. regardless of stack, self-esteem suffers when we feel we have nothing to contribute or what we contribute isn't wanted or doesn't matter.
➙ valuing each others' contributions falls in the soc area as well.

When soc is the blind spot:
~ opportunities to be with others are seen in terms of "what will it cost me". Can be a feeling of not caring, of being excessively selfish.
~ talking to self, may be really talking to self even when ostensibly talking to others, interrupting
~ always a feeling of not having made one's contribution even when one actually is contributing[/I]