Like, I’ve literally just been typed an eie, because I am “dramatic” and put out negative emotions.. Ok? How does this have anything to do with directly how I process and view things. Qaz00 has tried type me an “extrovert”, because I am viscerally reactive.. And ok, why do you think I am reactive, as in, what do you think it took for me to get to be this way? Because it took years for me to develop this response to abuse and severe bullying, including physical..
These metrics used to type me say absolutely nothing about my actual cognition and inherent energy focus— or of why to begin with, I focus on certain elements so much (devoid of mental and vital track for starters, which is absolutely huge for a lot of means, but it isn’t complete either). These are developments from my environment resulting in neurosis, which is in the scope of enneagram and somewhat John beebe.. But beebe more is about the inherent functions one has and is predisposed to tap into under neurotic psychological states. Enneagram is about a specific temperament that is likely genetic, and a pool of possibilities, in my view, for how this can end up shaping a person, relative to the environment they’re handed in, and how that molds the temperament within those pool of types…
Qaz tried say I fixate on intuitive elements.. Well, I would fixate a lot, because I am an intuitive type and have autism spectrum disorder with complex PTSD that features ocd (and have a physical health condition that damages brain and also results in fixation), so my mental elements (Fi, Ne, Ti and Se) will indeed fixate on a lot.. But I fixate way more on Si, Ti and Se… Than I do on my healthier used ego functions, which aren’t as neurotic. My Fe isn’t really a fixation, but it is where all my dysfunction shoots out in loud behavior and is a lot less controllable. My fixation is going to show up a lot in my mental elements… But as far as my unconscious fixation with Si, this may have do with being traumatized and just super ID.
Autism is quite literally defined by an intense preoccupation with specialized interests… Well, my special interests are going to mostly theme around my mental functions and unconscious desires, of course. Si is an unconscious desire for me..
As you can see, I fixate a fuck ton on Si, and it drives people absolutely insane:
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachmen...b8ac0d6db669c&
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachmen...fa6aa8eac27ea&
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachmen...baacd039f2a8e&
this is why I felt that I could have mental super ego Si partially, and because I do not discriminate Si info and absorb it in, no filter. But 2D element in general works, and it’s not like I’m vastly conscious of Si beyond certain fantasies and asd interests with it. My autism probably makes it look pseudo super ego.
I just can get fixated on general.. Because of the autism with ocd features and the cptsd dynamics (would probably show up more in unconscious functions for this), and with my physical condition that damaged my brain from repeated infections in my formative years and circle-jerk wired hyper-focus.
I can’t even help my fixation. It’s my brain wiring, both genetically, and added in with chronic infection brain damage (PANDAS— pediatric autoimmune neurological disorders associated with streptococcal infections).. My fixation is as extreme as it can be on anyone, unrelated to functions directly, though, it will probably blow up in mental functions a lot more. And yes, my autism symptoms developed before I ever had strep.. I got diagnosed with autism at 8, but I had signs present from infancy and on. PANDAS can mimic autism, but in my case, I just both have that and had repeated infections to where to this day, they still show in my blood. Then add in all my trauma and abuse history, and cptsd already causes ocd-like behavior, and you’ve extreme autism aggravated fixation.