Do things that explain the meaning of events or the meanings of deeper things tend to satisfy in a deep way? Would you say Ni is one of two functions you have the least grasp of?Originally Posted by kingslayer
"Feels very grateful to the one who can explain to him/her that everything will be alright, that everything will happen in its due time, and so on"
Like I know this myself, but I just want to hear it sometimes otherwise I remain anxious.
lol yeah, there's a thread on here of IEIs and EIEs discussing how SLEs seek and adjust to an external, explicit definition of what a relationship is. Ambiguous answers just tend to make the SLE anxious, frustrated, and start asking for a definition of "what are we" more frequently.
"Sometimes the SLE suddenly flares up over some minor thing and then quickly calms down – though it happens rarely, such flare-ups may be intense. During this time the SLE cannot control him/herself and may act out and tell everyone what he/she thinks of them. Believe me, you won't hear anything flattering about yourself, so it's better to not drive the SLE into this state. During the periods of such "emotional overheating" the SLE may leave, slam the door, turn off the phone, and in general do many strange things - behave himself inadequately, in summary."
I also relate strongly to this under Fe. I can act like a god dam child when I get upset because I have so much rage clouding my judgement. I don't like this about myself as it says. I also might have strong Fe though if that's possible. I definitely enjoy emotionally upbeat environments. I love when everyone is on the same page and all joking with each other myself being one of the main people cracking the jokes. I have worked as a server and customer service many years in my past and I think this has made me savvy with my Fe. I am pretty good at creating certain atmospheres, but I do feel like I need help maintaining them. Things such as positive emotional reactions from the people involved or spectating help me keep it going.
Would you say that getting a huge dose of an Fe environment makes you feel energized like a sugar rush?
The fun thing about the mobilizing function is that because one knows that they have a better understanding of it than their Suggestive function, they tend to try and consciously use it more because they are seeking it in the environment. To an Ego Fe person, though, an SLE trying to produce that upbeat Fe environment looks a little clumsy, sort of like when a kid is first learning swear words. To people that don't value Fe that clumsiness just comes off as annoying and they can respond poorly. The descriptions of Fe for SLE often include the parts where SLEs will try to produce an Fe upbeat environment, but the attempt will fail and be seriously frustrating to the SLE.
Another aspect is that the mobilizing funtion is two-dimensional, so it's "normative," falling into acceptable uses based on the socially defined constraints of a role in a given situation. That's where the part in that write up about
Fe as Mobilizing Function (SLE, ILE)
The individual longs for situations where people are having fun, laughing and joking, and feel emotionally free and spontaneous. However, he is generally unable to produce this atmosphere himself and uses other means to create situations where there is a good chance that others will take the emotional initiative and create a fun and emotionally stimulating atmosphere. Failure at such attempts are met with dismay, which the individual either hides or reacts to with frustration and annoyance.
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For example, the normative E can be seen in identical cliche smiles. Examine carefully your photographs and photographs of other people. Particularly well this can be seen on photographs of children, because children are more spontaneous when express their natural emotions. If you scroll through a family album, you will notice that facial expressions of some people are nearly the same on all pictures, whereas others have a wider emotional range. Normative smiles look standard and correct in all situations. As if normative E-types feel some limit to how much they can stretch their facial muscles, and everything that goes further is risky and ventures beyond the the average. Normative E-types know well situations in which they are required to smile, for example, when meeting people, when saying "goodbye" when showing their disposition to someone during a conversation, etc.
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By the way, on decency: not seldom does the ESTp have serious difficulties with this. And not because he doesn't know how he should behave or that he didn't have good upbringing - here everything is usually satisfactory. (Everything that he needs to know, the ESTp always knows.) But the moment the ESTp relaxes and loosen up a little bit (this most frequently happens around guests) as he starts to "fall out of his role" and feel embarrassed and perplexed by this very circumstance, and, consequently, he also starts to react sharply and sensitively to any observations and remarks. It is sufficient for someone present to react inadequately to his joke or statement for ESTp's emotionalism to pass the boundaries of the permissible. If precisely at this moment the ESTp is reminded of decency and appropriateness, he may completely lose control over his words and actions. Perhaps this is why many ESTps try not to relax too much around guests or to receive guests at their home where they feel themselves more composed and confident.
Would you say Fi is the function you have the hardest time saying that you have hardest time saying that you're shit at?As for your other questions. I don't think I am easily led on.. Though according to others I can be. If someone is being friendly, I can be skeptical - especially if they are overly-friendly. I am not very trusting with people at all. In fact I find it difficult to trust. But when someone is the right kind of friendly with me, they can sneak their way into a period of trust until they show me a reason otherwise. I am overall not trustful of people though. Including my own family members.
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The SLE carefully "picks out" his/her own people from the "others". For someone to become his or her "own" it takes some time. A single mistake can throw you back to the starting point.
Doesn't always realize that a smile on someone's face and good manners are not necessarily a measure of this person's good disposition and sincerity. Some people smile just "because". SLE hates this type of ambiguity. He doesn't have the resources to track all of the signals of this type. Thus he/she is easily led on by ethical games – SLE's consideration can be won simply by good treatment; he won't immediately recognize a trap. But once he sees it, he won't give the person a second chance. The SLE can be led on and manipulated by good attitude for a long time, but not forever. If he catches you on a lie, sees that behind your smile hides something else besides kindness, then he/she will stop trusting you out of principle, and then smile however much you wish. But to demonstrations of good attitude he will usually react positively, even if it's coming from a person whom he/she doesn't like and doesn't trust.
In general, the SLE doesn't know how to keep distance in communication (distance in ethical sense). Thus, he/she feels worried and anxious about it. If a person tries to intrude on his territory and at the same time behaves in a very friendly way, for the SLE it will be difficult to rebuff them. It feels awkward and somehow uncomfortable to offend a good person … The SLE knows how to distance only in physical sense – to move, change place of work, to not pick up the phone, not open the door, cut off communication, not say anything, not allow someone to enter into his life.
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How much of the above would you say is true if you had to be as kick-in-the-nuts brutally honest as you could? First time I read that the response was basically "oh. okay. yeah. I thought I could read people pretty well but anyone that's treated me nicely with a smile has been able to lead me around by the nose a LOT"
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