.
I went back and forth between Sx/Sp and Sp/Sx for quite a while when I first found the instincts. From the descriptions I found, my lifestyle matched up more with Sp/Sx, but Sx/Sp sounded like the person I wanted to be. After befriending and working with many Sp/Sxs though the difference between our styles of interaction is very apparent.
The two types seem very similar on the surface, and even after getting to know an so-last distinguishing between both types can be problematic. In my experience with Sp/Sx friendships, some are much more obviously Sp-first than others, but others will have a more reactive engagement with me when we're talking, a certain internal spontaneity characteristic of Sx in general. But the Sx/Sp and Sp/Sx lifestyles are on opposite ends of the same spectrum. The closed-off aloof vibe of an Sx/Sp will gradually melt away entirely when fully engaged with an object of obsession, whereas an Sp/Sx will likely always retain some inner core of selfness that can't be shaken. The internal reactivity of Sx becomes more of a passing affect, a mask that can be put on and taken off seemingly at will.
I'll try to post more concrete examples when I'm more focused, everything feels muddy atm.
I've always thought of you as contra-flow. The sx is there but you vibe kind of thick-skinned and contented, and lack a certain naivety/idealism that I get from Syn-flow people.
“My typology is . . . not in any sense to stick labels on people at first sight. It is not a physiognomy and not an anthropological system, but a critical psychology dealing with the organization and delimitation of psychic processes that can be shown to be typical.” —C.G. Jung
There's a slightly more 'aggressive' (read assertive, not hostile) vibe in the OP than I find in sp/sx. It's visible even in the context of other EIIs to be seen around. From the little I know of her, she doesn't strike me as grounded&calming, but as guarded. I think I stated my opinion already in a VI thread. I recall someone said she comes across as 'a feline-like creature' and that qualifier seemed spot-on to me. There's something less static in her than in sp/sx. It vibes like some controlled energy ...but it's there.
Overall she doesn't seem to use Sx 'creatively' ...in a showy fashion. Quite the opposite. And since she's such an obvious So last .... it just makes more sense that she's Sx first .... they are more prone to keep that instinct close to their core and more hidden (than both Sx/so and Sx second).
Last edited by Amber; 01-23-2015 at 01:04 PM.
I've recently been paying attention to instictual stackings, which I usually ignored.
After reading the different stackings descriptions and commenting them, I would say sx/sp is the option that fits better for me. I quite like this description in particular:
Although there are still certain things that make me doubt between sx/sp and "its mirror" sp/sx. sp/sx descriptions I have found are not so rounded and a bit more like an hodgepodge of different aspects, so I'm not sure if I'm really getting its essence. And of course, after you read this:
I understand this is intended to me metaphorical, a sort of "look at me, this is how I am, accept me or leave me alone", but my reaction after reading this is... wtf?
Let's see if I understand these keypoints about instinctual stackings correctly:
- The strongest stacking is supposed to to be the most deeply rooted in the psyche. Due to this, it's not so [externally] obvious as you could expect for it, as it's "too personal" so to speak. It belongs to the user and it's for the user, not for other people (directly). The second and last stacking are less rooted and therefore more openly exposed. As the last one is too weak, all thing equals the sencond one would be the "most visible" or superfically apparent. But once you're closer enough to a particular person and intimacy could be more openly shared, you will notice that the strongest impulses lives in another dimension of the person's psyche.
- A simple comparsion of this effect could be socionics leading versus creative function. Creative is weaker, but it's also the main way of interacting with the external world.
This "contradiction" will cause unexpected results. For example, an sp/so would be more social than assumed, [relatively easily] willing to engage in groupal activities and experiences. The main sp stacking could manifest in the form of an extremely reserved person, who has certain personal (mental) space so private it's very difficult (very high degree of confidence is required) for being shared, even the closest friends. This would the the "archetypal" stacking at first for strong introverts.
Whereas an sx/sp, which is so-last, will refuse to engage in most social/gropual activities, being a natural isolacionist. Technically the most isolacionist, because although his energy levels are higher than in the case of sp/sx, this "energy" is held back due to a "defensive" creative (more externally directed) dimension. It would mostly be addressed in a personal fashion: the object of desire (a person, a project, a lifegoal, etc), that once found, will receive all this energy in the form of intense discharge (focus). sp/sx should share his/her energy more easily and in a broader sense. Higher energy but more concentrated should give to sx/sp an higher contrast than sp/sx in relation to personal distance. For outsiders, a true introvert, but once a close bond is formed, the person "explodes" with an energy level that can catch by surprise his more social friends.
Another contrast would be a potential higher level of frustration in sx/sp than sp/sx. The "I want what I want" nature of sx-first makes the user unsatisfied with less than this, not easily accepting compromises or alternatives of any kind for the object of desire. More internal pain, suffering, due to the higher difficulty for fullfilling the critical needs of his psyche.
What I do not clearly understand is why an sp/sx would react in the fashion described by the quoted comment (the "distorted exhibitionism"). They're supposed to be less isolationists than sx/sp, as the "external function" is not "defensive". But simultaneously, they should be by default more reserved than sx/sp, as they're sp-first. Sx/sp has the contrast of being an isolacionist who wants to meld with the object of desire, whereas an sp/sx would keep an higher barrier between himself an such object. It seems an sx/sp should share more easily his essence once opening up, and this include the dark aspects of the soul.
This being said, I find the imageniery showed in the sp/sx thread somehow a bit dirturbing and quite less appealing than in the case of sx/sp thread. And by the way, they have a sort of strong Ni-ish aura (more in a beta fashion than gamma one methinks).
Regarding how different stackings interact with each other, the "reverse stacking" is supposed to be "the conflictor" whereas the "dual" would be simultaneously the "identical" (same stacking). If this is correct and the people referred in the Pinterest link contained in the first quote are accurately typed, then this is another clue for picking sx/sp in my case. They have an extremely similar facial expression when compared to my own. I find the so/sp examples particularly disgusting, repulsive, more than so/sx. Nicole Kidman seems hollow, substanceless (regardless it's quite possible she's LII), Wes Bentley will eat your children, Blavatsky seems what she was, a cult leader, and that woman Fiona Apple... I do not know even how to describe the repulsion I feel looking at her pictures.
Despite of this, I suspect the combo of two sp/sx could be more troublesome than it seems. Not due to "natural repusion" (this is not the case), but because the natural intensity could magnify potential conflicts.
Considering the "Ni resemblance" that sp/sx imagery has, I wonder how it could be perceived by sx/sp from different sociotypes and enneatypes. For example, is it possible that a LII (4D Ni) sx/sp will "tolerate/digest" sp/sx essence more easily than an ILE sx/sp (Ni ignoring)?
There was another thread, not long ago, about this too and I am trying to find it. I am a bit repulsed by some of the stuff posted in the sp/sx thread. It all seems so "dirty" in contrast but I do not consider the sp/sx in my life as "dirty". They are pretty stable influences on me and, in general, I do not find them or their interests repulsive.
I am not sure if I would use the sp/sx quoted portion as reference material when trying to decide between the two.
How did Marilyn Monroe get typed so/sp on that pinterest link??? That seems completely off to type her sx last.
“My typology is . . . not in any sense to stick labels on people at first sight. It is not a physiognomy and not an anthropological system, but a critical psychology dealing with the organization and delimitation of psychic processes that can be shown to be typical.” —C.G. Jung
Well the imaginery presented in the sp/sx thread seems a bit "weird", but I was not considering them "respulsive" in the sense of causing discomfort onto me (this seems to be the case of sosp if most of them are accurately typed in the Pinterest link).
Agree. I have compated a lot of their characteristics not just this "exhibitionism" alone. I would say that sx/sp seems to fit quite better, but I'm not completely sure.I am not sure if I would use the sp/sx quoted portion as reference material when trying to decide between the two.
True, sounds a bit odd.How did Marilyn Monroe get typed so/sp on that pinterest link??? That seems completely off to type her sx last.
“My typology is . . . not in any sense to stick labels on people at first sight. It is not a physiognomy and not an anthropological system, but a critical psychology dealing with the organization and delimitation of psychic processes that can be shown to be typical.” —C.G. Jung
IME the first instinct isn't really too 'personal' to be overtly expressed, as much as it simply operates the most actively without the person realizing it. It's more an unconscious way of life that rarely if ever gets challenged by the individual. You know the old joke about the one fish saying "nice water today," and the other fish responding "wtf is water?" Yeah, that.
The second instinct operates in a much more psychologically tangible way. Each instinct stack consciously creates specific goals based on the second instinct more than the primary, so they'll more actively work towards those desires with the primary instinct acting as subtext and a deeper modus operandi.
I'd probably say the second instinct is less neurotic than the first, not necessarily weaker.
I've noticed this in sp/sos too, especially the IXXx sp/sos I know. They come off as initially pretty flat and unreactive, but once you get them around friends they come to life.
This is a bit overblown IMO. The last instinct isn't usually an active point of contention for any stacking, it's just prioritized the least mentally. Sx/Sps don't actively reject the social aspects of the human condition as much as they just forget about it, or are much more willing to let that side of life run dry for longer. In a way the last instinct is actually the least neurotic, since the goals of that instinct are the least focused on of the bunch.
Again this sounds pretty melodramatic. I don't think any instinct can be defined by the level of emotional torment they subject themselves to.
IME the psychological exhibitionism that sp/sxs perform is pretty flash-in-the-pan. The secondary instinct shows itself on the surface for only a select portion of the time, a much more consciously displayed and pursued mode of being than the primary.
To be fair a lot of that imagery in the sp/sx thread was highly influenced by lungs' visual aesthetic, and I think a lot of people picked up on that and ran with it.
Pics pls
Nah, sp/sxs usually have the strongest respect for each other's personal space (unless they hate each other I guess)
See my earlier response re: the sp/sx thread.
Last edited by Galen; 06-12-2015 at 05:02 PM.
I see. More unconscious then. I suspect that if this is the case, the user would be more "vulnerable" to the main stacking dimension and its needs. Less consciously aware of it >> less consciously aware of how to properly satify its needs >> a sort of hunger that you do not understand where it comes from, you only feel it. A "pure instinct" or "id" in the Freudian sense, versus the second stacking which would be a more "sublimated/conscious" instinct or "ego".
The fish...
If by neurotic you mean "it never switches off" then this points to sx-first in my case.I'd probably say the second instinct is less neurotic than the first, not necessarily weaker.
I see. I was using more or less the correlation first-second-last to "leading-creative-polr" (as an analogy, I did not mean that they correspond in such way to Socionics type as I know they refer to a different dimension) . Maybe the last one would work better as a sort of "DS" then...This is a bit overblown IMO. The last instinct isn't usually an active point of contention for any stacking, it's just prioritized the least mentally. Sx/Sps don't actively reject the social aspects of the human condition as much as they just forget about it, or are much more willing to let that side of life run dry for longer. In a way the last instinct is actually the least neurotic, since the goals of that instinct are the least focused on of the bunch.
I guess so. Generally speaking my original words probably do not work, but I said that considering the sx/sp and sxp/sx contrast; sx/sp is aparently described in such fashion.Again this sounds pretty melodramatic. I don't think any instinct can be defined by the level of emotional torment they subject themselves to.
That seems to be the key, makes sense.IME the psychological exhibitionism that sp/sxs perform is pretty flash-in-the-pan. The secondary instinct shows itself on the surface for only a select portion of the time, a much more consciously displayed and pursued mode of being than the primary.
The first thing that came to my mind after seeing it was the youtuber Cyriak. His videos are somehow "insane" although entertaining. If you do not know him, take a look:To be fair a lot of that imagery in the sp/sx thread was highly influenced by lungs' visual aesthetic, and I think a lot of people picked up on that and ran with it.
This is one is quite mild considering many of his work.
I'm not in the mood of posting pics of me right now (maybe by PM). But if you agree that "Nikolai Levchenko" (top left in the Pinterest link) and "Vasili the INTJ" (top right) are good representatives of sx/sp facial expression, mine is quite similar (particularly compared with Vasili, although I tend to look even angrier). I had several pictures posted in my type-me thread; I have deleted them but maybe you remeber how my face looks like.Pics pls
You probably meant "sx/sp". And good point. If a strong conflict arises...Nah, sp/sxs usually have the strongest respect for each other's personal space (unless they hate each other I guess)
[EDIT]
No, the last stacking should still work a bit closer to "PoLR" than "DS". If not, the "reverse stacking is the least compatible" would not make sense. Even if this does not imply a total rejection of this dimension.
Last edited by MensSuperMateriam; 06-12-2015 at 10:38 PM.
I'm well-versed in the eye fuckery of Cyriak. From what little I've seen of his actual person, I would guess so/sp for him.
Talk is cheap, give me your face.
It's probably easier to think of the instinct as a sequence of internal priorities, not a rigid structure where each instinct in the order serves some esoteric function.
Well I have not seen any interview of him or any other kind of personal information, so I'm not assuring an actual type. I just said the imaginery of his work somehow resembles what has been posted in the sp/sx thread. Which does not imply he has to belong to it, of course.
Very well. For a brief amount of time, I'll make some pictures available. [DELETED]Talk is cheap, give me your face.
The most recent ("happy face") is an exception to the rule as I have serious troubles similing to the camera. Included for contrast.
Imo you're misinterpreting my words here, as I specifically used quotation marks for a reason. The "socionics analogy" was intended to be just that, an analogy for easily describing this phenomenon with the known nomenclature used for another one. I'm not trying to build a sort of "complex framework" for instincts now (in case you're thinking this), as I see them as fluid and flexible as you probably do.It's probably easier to think of the instinct as a sequence of internal priorities, not a rigid structure where each instinct in the order serves some esoteric function.
But even if they are just a priority, this could be caused by several reasons. It seems you think it's a simple as "you ignore more/pay less attention" to the last one, it is less important [needed and/or liked]. But if it's less liked this also means it's more disliked, hence my point.
I guess multiple options are possible here. Someone who is less polarized and has reasonable levels of all of its intincts would be fit well in your description. For a more polarized user, the last instint could start becoming closer to this sort of "pseudo-PoLR".
But there's a fact (apparently, according to the descriptions I've read to this moment): reverse stackings are the least compatible. You have a potential alternative case, and this would be reverse as the most compatible. Things seem to work according to the first situation, not the second. So this have to mean something. It seems there is an higher rejection for the last slacking than just "it's not as good as the others". And simultaneously, an higher need and acceptation for the dominant one.
Last edited by MensSuperMateriam; 06-15-2015 at 05:56 PM.
sp/sx's are more naturally in their own world, and their insularity is compensated for by a certain degree of receptivity, though this can come and go depending on mood, and the latter can carry a certain level of... existential detachment, which syn-flow types will usually find discordant. sx/sp otoh is a little more internally conflicted, like they can never fully decide whether to stay within their boundaries or pursue an object of interest. an sp/sx would likely find an sx/sp to be a bit 'much' at times, maybe somewhat too emotionally demanding, while an sx/sp would find an sp/sx to be somewhat reassuring, but not quite 'alive' enough.
4w3-5w6-8w7
When typing yourself how do you tell the two apart?
LSI-Se 836 Sp/Sx
Personally it was a no brainer for me, typing myself as self preservational first. The self preservational instinct is something, that I feel very close to. Idk for you, just do whatever you want. Idk maybe you can read these break down of types, like for example with my enneatype: sp 1 is different than sx 1 or so 1.
I'm also borderline between these stackings. I'm not at all concerned with "saving for a rainy day" which seems to be the theme of sp, but I wouldn't say that my life is loose and chaotic either. So yeah, I would also appreciate it if someone can elaborate the differences between these stackings.
This made me think, what do I personally connect with the sp-instinct. What do I actually see as sp themes. Yeah ‚ saving for a rainy day‘. I was once reading this novel ‚The Road‘ by Cormac McCarthy. It‘s basically father and son trying to get along under the most difficult circumstances. ‚Saving for rainy day‘ is the feeling for me of ‚Do you have enough resources, do you have enough left, that you can draw from, when it comes hard on hard‘ (~ concern about resources, having enough/fear of scarcity). Resources can be money, but it can also be something different, something inside. There was this part, where they walk on and on in the book and the father has this memory, about his wife and it basically goes like this:[...] "saving for a rainy day" which seems to be the theme of sp [...]
“From daydreams on the road there was no waking. He plodded on. He could remember everything of her save her scent. Seated in a theatre with her beside him leaning forward listening to the music. Gold scrollwork and sconces and the tall columnar folds of the drapes at either side of the stage. She held his hand in her lap and he could feel the tops of her stockings through the thin stuff of her summer dress. Freeze this frame. Now call down your dark and your cold and be damned.”
Now call down your dark and cold and be damned. I thought that was a cool line (kind of encompasses the personality gets energy part for me).
~ instincts are "the intelligence of life" -- intelligence of billions of years of evolution
~ personality is an activity; instincts are where the personality gets energy for that activity
~ ego issues feel like life and death because the activity of the ego is "plugged into" the instincts
~ instinctual matters feel non-negotiable / these are where the ego puts its foot down. ***
There was this film. I stumbled upon it, because it was mentioned in one book. Seven Beauties. Like there is this guy in concentration camp and there is this concentration camp guard. He seduces her and sleeps with her, in order to survive. I was really shocked, impacted by that (like everytime with things like that, it stirs sth. in me, my own sp-angst?). Like it’s horrible and terrifying, but it’s like how it just can be (history has shown that), that humans are just animals trying to survive and I don’t feel like I’m getting super weird here. I mean you just need to look at the streets, just need to watch the news. Self preservational instinct (‚intelligence of life‘ – intelligence of billions of years of evolution).
Infractions in the sp area are just something that go to the core for me (issues feel like life and death, non negotionable). Like when people don‘t have enough food. Like when mothers cannot feed their children and they are basically holding a skeleton of a human in their arms and idk... Also like when people don’t have a home. I mean sleeping on the streets in winter and having to be on watch, not to be beaten up or something else is going to be done to you. For me it’s like the terrifying truth. I mean there are examples over examples from everything that goes on in the world. That’s why for me when you have like food, when you are safe, when you have a cool home. That’s like awesome.
More here: http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin/showthread.php/41782-Instinct-workshop-notes-sp-so-sx***
@Nymeria I checked out that link you posted and I found it very informative. After reading more I think the possibility me being Sx-last might not be entirely out of the questions. I do often get the feeling like I'm stuck in rut is described in having Sp-first. Perhaps my sp manifest more as me being a homebody, which I very much am. It also sounds like being soc-last is more about being overly pragmatic and not valuing fun for the sake of having fun rather then not hanging with people on a regular basis. (which is the result of my sp wanting to stay at home)
hoi willekeurig, hoe gaat ie ermee.
Difference would be most clear by just looking at the main instinct.
Sx is focussed on others, Sp is focussed on self.
Sx types : here the fuck i am in your face dude. even when they are shy, they tend to gravitate towards this. Let's burn something and have a drink to 4 oclock in the morning.
Sp types : my shoe hurts, i don't go out with you guys, i have to sleep at 10 oclock, my belly hurts, i only like half of the food they served, i leave the rest uneaten.
Seems like this instinct crap is being overcomplicated again.
Sp/Sx is like, join my world, I let you in. Sx/Sp is the complete opposite, they create the world or invade the other one's: "Building a new nest, just the two of us".
@Tigerfadder I'm sure it is, but no one says that in general for some reason.
@Myst I think the sx/sp pretas metaphor is really good
Pretas are invisible to the human eye, but some believe they can be discerned by humans in certain mental states. They are described as human-like, but with sunken, mummified skin, narrow limbs, enormously distended bellies and long, thin necks. This appearance is a metaphor for their mental situation: they have enormous appetites, signified by their gigantic bellies, but a very limited ability to satisfy those appetites, symbolized by their slender necks.I thought this was a 4 thing before. @Aylen sx/sp + 4 is so much paainPretas dwell in the waste and desert places of the earth, and vary in situation according to their past karma. Some of them can eat a little, but find it very difficult to find food or drink. Others can find food and drink, but find it very difficult to swallow. Others find that the food they eat seems to burst into flames as they swallow it. Others see something edible or drinkable and desire it but it withers or dries up before their eyes. As a result, they are always hungry.
Last edited by maniac; 11-06-2016 at 07:59 AM.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Naraka_(Buddhism)
from enneasite.comsp/sx (Hell) = acultural solipsism ~ counterculture original, underbelly exposure, smoldering mysterian, the fermenting underground, cool & detached
its that. i'm not sp/sx so i can't explain besides that sp firsts can stay with things they hate for long, to have financial security which theyre obsessed with. it makes sense though. sp/sx doesnt have the soc instinct so they dont care what society think + theyre contraflow hence they are the darkest stacking.
i tried to find something that he wrote on forums and i found this:
bL- I agree with sx/sp having an underlying drive to infect on a person-to-person level. With sp/sx, the pull toward exposing the underbelly of society and humanity (sometimes through the context of person-to-person scenarios), starting an atrophy cycle that melts established social forms at an elemental level.
For me, that points again to the correlation between sx/sp and Hungry Ghosts, and sp/sx with Hell. Hungry ghosts is hyper-personal and has a heart-connected quality to it (a victim of the plague of yearning), while sp/sx is about the place, somehow haunting the larger sphere/setting; the World as Hell.
Both sp/sx and sx/sp are dark, it's just sx/sp is more drawn to people/individuals so it automatically makes them less antisocial in a way, lol.
"sx/sp and sp/sx are significantly missing the Social elements of fresh air and sunlight. Looking at them there’s a kind of shrouded/hooded quality, something of a cave-dweller or a Death theme in some form. ‹ Take away air, quickly comes Death. ›The obliviousness to the collective good (Social-last) contributes to the shadowy/cloaked quality of these stackings — there’s an unintelligence about social stigma that can take people of these two stackings deep into ‘alternative’ territories. The aspect of Social that’s compelled to define people into clear roles that connect into a bigger picture is missing here. So, an upside in these two stackings is that communications can be more personal, contactful and intimate because the aura of the collective isn’t brought into one-to-one exchanges in the way it inadvertently is with those who aren’t social-last. This friend-of-the-dark quality can translate to a capacity to work, hands on (figuratively-speaking), in the muck of psyche, and linger long in a non-judgmental attitude with other people’s ugly/corrupt underbellies and issues, potentially even spilling themselves into others’ dark sides."
Your first instinct is your religion. Your 2nd is USUALLY a source of pleasure and fun, but it gets ruined when it becomes too serious.
We give up anything for our religion, so if Im having troubles with my partner i would sacrifice my security and money. I would be okay with living on the streets as long as I have you by my side. Literally. SX first gets obsessed with their partners and its almost like you're subconsciously forcing the passion and sparks to happen. Sp first moves slow (from an sx firsts POV), or at least their emotions do.
Last edited by maniac; 10-30-2016 at 01:53 PM.
@Ghost Are you sure you're synflow though? Also, my religion is my religion, not partners, society, or self-preservation. I'm also not entirely sure Sx is about partners and you just sound sort of codependent to me. Based on your definitions of the stackings, Sp/So ironically literally sounds like the most desirable one, because you just care about yourself first and then engage with society when it suits you (but don't depend on the approval of others) and then finally comes partners (who aren't as important as the wider world). But that's not how I see the stackings defined literally anywhere else, and anyways, the way you conceptualize them makes it sound like Sp/So is the stacking for revolutionaries when it tends to be considered the boring one.
Last edited by Pallas; 10-30-2016 at 08:46 AM.
Im drawn towards people and want to be involved with people so yes.
"Religion" is a metaphor for what matters the absolute most to you and what you life for.
SX is about fiery passion when it is first you feel like half a person so you need another person to merge with (with fiery passion). So yes sx firsts are codependent. I usually imagine the picture of John Lennon and Yoko Ono together where theyre lying together as sx (John). Cant look it up rn cause im on my phone.
- That doesnt mean other stackings cant be codependent though.
Why do you find it "ironic" that sp/so is the most desirable to you?
I dont know if I find any of the stackings "ideal". Its like asking whether brown or blonde hair is better. Ive been envious of sp/sx girls because they are like cats, mysterious, detached. I think thats really attractive. My envy is sx + 4 based in that im only envious because I think theyre more attractive than me though.
Last edited by maniac; 10-30-2016 at 10:35 AM.
@Ghost I don't think Sp/So is the most desirable from most descriptions though, just from yours, because the way you describe it makes it sound like some sort of social revolutionary stacking, and I find that to sound appealing (it tends to be described as the the exact opposite BTW). Also, being codependent is not healthy FYI.
@Verbrannte when did i describe it as "social revolutionary"? And if you think that is desirable then you are probably not soc last.
Thats why most sx firsts tend to be 'unhealthy'.
This is what sx firsts deep down believe they need to survive and its not as easy as saying its not unhealthy etc. Its the same as trying to convince an sp first that money and security is not what matters the most. Keep in mind sp/so may say 'family matters most' and yes family probably matters a lot to them but take away their financial security, belongings and they will be horribly stressed out and neglect other things until they get it under control again. Ive dated an sp first who was poor and he was so worried about it constantly and made him depressed and i felt bad for him but couldnt fully understand how bad his anxiety was about this because im not sp first.