sx/sp

[Neokortex]

Big Idea, People! Here:

How about we join forces and open and sticky a new Sx/Sp thread only for meeting other Sx/Sps. The content to be reduced to intimate conversations that others don't mind. Bc if you're uncomfortable with more intimacy, then you typed yourself wrong and you may find Sx/Sps offensive, objectifying.

Better yet:
3 threads for getting-to-know Sx/Sps.
Head-type Sx/Sp

Heart-type Sx/Sp

Gut-type Sx/Sp

Because: Head-type dominants may feel uncomfortable to open up quicker with their feelings. Heart-type doms may find the smarty-pants & quickwit of Head-types arrogant. And both may mutually cringe at the the foregrounded lust, earthiness of E8, E9, not to mention being driven away by the shocking aggressiveness of Sx/Sp E8, E1.

What do you say?

[maniac]

sx/sps are sexual healers

[Aylen]

I'm more aware, though, bc I checked the music videos. People just can't be farther from the empirical counterpart of these theories out there.

Then we gotta open another Sx/Sp thread for some serious exchange since I couldn't find any other "general" Sx/Sp threads out there. On a 2nd thought, maybe 3 Sx/Sp threads: for Head, Heart & Gut centers.

Point is: that even though some people seem to "get it," the thread doesn't really contain any Sx/Sp behavior from the part of the users. They aren't locking on each other like some bloodsuckin' goatsuckin' chupacabras. If you get my drift. I asked you a question before about your own real life sx/sp behavior, you had mentioned some experimenting tricks on people-thing but you completely ignored it. Same thing here, opening up instead of speaking about something removed from their private self would require more intimacy btw the members. Would you be so kind and break the ice Miss Aylen? Bouncing ideas is okay but I think there're some who come here to meet other Sx/Sps. For Real. To hunt down a partner. :-P Find a friend.

I remember you asked me for something in another thread when I was not really in a mood for sharing. You might have gotten a response if you asked in pm. Depending on whether or not I was feeling open. I don't personally come to this thread looking for other sx/sp. I can't feel forced to open up or connect. That might cause me to shut down. It is something that happens spontaneously and organically. Opening up to the whole forum does not feel "intimate" or comfortable in any way. I know I have posted quite a few things that people might take as oversharing but, generally, I think about those posts, soon after, then delete them.

I feel my posts are usually measured so I don't alienate myself completely. Like I said I don't feel a lot of people can relate to my experiences but those who do, or want to, end up finding me. I am not looking for any social approval. It is nice when someone relates but it is more about self expression for me. I have been very open about myself with select people on this forum and as far as I am concerned those are the people who cared enough to get to know me and not use me as a social experiment.

So anyway while I was responding to you I hit some weird key combination that caused this to pop up full screen. I don't even know where it came from but it was a freaky enough coincidence that I feel compelled to share it. :/



I have ghosts...

Edit: I am sure of my stacking but being sx/sp does not mean I want to merge/connect with EVERYONE.

[lynn]

[lynn]

[mclane]

[noguchi]

Not sure if all these are because of my sx/sp-ness but that's me :

- I have been complained all the time that I am too flirty, even when I am not talking and I never try to
- When I want something, I just go straight for it right here right now, what others think never comes to my mind (not that I don't know how they will think or I don't give shit about it, it just doesn't come to my mind until it's too late or I am reminded)
- I tend to dress up with a bit of style even when I am just running errands. I usually spend 3 mins max cuz good style is already enough for me. And I never wear make up cuz I don't see much difference but just a waste of time.
- I love travelling (and that's what I'm doing now) and always want a travel mate even if for just a day. But when I feel I stick to a person for too long, I wanna run away (for a while at least)
- (no bragging) Quite a lot of guys are interested in me (I didn't try to get their attention) and when I feel that they keep looking at me, I tend to push them away or shy myself away. (Or maybe this is because I am E4 or INFx) That's why although I always want a partner, I have been single for like 3 years
- I don't know why every time I introduce myself to an so/sp, they seems intimidated to me (or I simply get it wrong?)
- I dated a few sx/sp so far and I never want to date them again. They have too much negativity and too complainy to me, even tho they don't mean to
- Bargaining in the market makes no sense at all to me. If I don't like the price I just go. No waste of time.
- Same as in a party. If I can't find anyone to have a good conversation with, I just go home even if alone.
- When I like something, I keep doing it over and over and over again until I feel bored and that's the time I completely turn to something else. And the loop begins, again.
- The biggest difference between sx/so and sx/sp to me is. Sx/so never really dress up well unless they have to, sx/sp never aware of what others think unless they have to. But both are aggressive.

[lynn]

[noguchi]

Nah he's not

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[Neokortex]

I remember you asked me for something in another thread when I was not really in a mood for sharing. You might have gotten a response if you asked in pm. Depending on whether or not I was feeling open.

... and I'm not a mind reader. I didn't hazard thinking anything on why you weren't responsive. Maybe just "the usual new-gen kiddo, ghosting people bc the tech ethics allow it." It's always easier to turn the shoulder from behind a screen...

I don't personally come to this thread looking for other sx/sp. I can't feel forced to open up or connect. That might cause me to shut down. It is something that happens spontaneously and organically. Opening up to the whole forum does not feel "intimate" or comfortable in any way. I know I have posted quite a few things that people might take as oversharing but, generally, I think about those posts, soon after, then delete them.

... and hence I think the 5 doesn't have an Sx/Sp version. For me it's rather the 1 and 7 that makes me more extroverted... not that I cared to open up to people in an en masse way but if I wanted to confess sone sthing, I won't be nervously looking around about what would they think of it, who is seeing at the time... or at least not here where there aren't much stakes involved. You recoiling instantaneously can be seen as Sp first. Because you're intimidated? Bc your security, bundledness comes first?

I feel my posts are usually measured so I don't alienate myself completely. Like I said I don't feel a lot of people can relate to my experiences but those who do, or want to, end up finding me. I am not looking for any social approval. It is nice when someone relates but it is more about self expression for me. I have been very open about myself with select people on this forum and as far as I am concerned those are the people who cared enough to get to know me and not use me as a social experiment.

... and thus I recommend sp/sx 5. Because of the passive attitude. The "they'll find me." You have a different sense of time. A stronger Si; - stick around long enough and sthing will happen. Calm waters. Some people will begin to like you. I don't have that consistency, that patience. I'm more actively hunting, hence I'm not here all the time. You seem to have less hiatus. The Si habit takes hold and you perpetuate. Keep a handful of close friends and not break out from old & break in into new wildly bc of the hunger. Not drive them away by penetrating their skin.

So anyway while I was responding to you I hit some weird key combination that caused this to pop up full screen. I don't even know where it came from but it was a freaky enough coincidence that I feel compelled to share it. :/

Oh, a meme. Um, yeah. It says... it proposes romance. It asks the girl to come out of her shell, to push herself to the limits when confessing for him. It motivates. You. (so 9)

Edit: I am sure of my stacking but being sx/sp does not mean I want to merge/connect with EVERYONE.

Same here. But I always get an instinctive heads-up when I sense another Sx on the horizon. Somebody really standing out from the crowd. The boring crowd. Gotta make a move to check if I'm missing out on something or not.

[Aylen]

... and I'm not a mind reader. I didn't hazard thinking anything on why you weren't responsive. Maybe just "the usual new-gen kiddo, ghosting people bc the tech ethics allow it." It's always easier to turn the shoulder from behind a screen...

... and hence I think the 5 doesn't have an Sx/Sp version. For me it's rather the 1 and 7 that makes me more extroverted... not that I cared to open up to people in an en masse way but if I wanted to confess sone sthing, I won't be nervously looking around about what would they think of it, who is seeing at the time... or at least not here where there aren't much stakes involved. You recoiling instantaneously can be seen as Sp first. Because you're intimidated? Bc your security, bundledness comes first?

... and thus I recommend sp/sx 5. Because of the passive attitude. The "they'll find me." You have a different sense of time. A stronger Si; - stick around long enough and sthing will happen. Calm waters. Some people will begin to like you. I don't have that consistency, that patience. I'm more actively hunting, hence I'm not here all the time. You seem to have less hiatus. The Si habit takes hold and you perpetuate. Keep a handful of close friends and not break out from old & break in into new wildly bc of the hunger. Not drive them away by penetrating their skin.


Oh, a meme. Um, yeah. It says... it proposes romance. It asks the girl to come out of her shell, to push herself to the limits when confessing for him. It motivates. You. (so 9)

Same here. But I always get an instinctive heads-up when I sense another Sx on the horizon. Somebody really standing out from the crowd. The boring crowd. Gotta make a move to check if I'm missing out on something or not.

You can recommend whatever you want. But I am old enough and wise enough to know who the fuck I am so don't think you can come on here and tell me who I am based on my response. It just makes you look completely ignorant of reality. I was trying to be polite but fuck it. I recoiled from you specifically.

I think you should consider your self-typing because it doesn't make sense.

p.s. You are LSE

[Neokortex]

Not sure if all these are because of my sx/sp-ness but that's me :

- I have been complained all the time that I am too flirty, even when I am not talking and I never try to
- When I want something, I just go straight for it right here right now, what others think never comes to my mind (not that I don't know how they will think or I don't give shit about it, it just doesn't come to my mind until it's too late or I am reminded)
- I tend to dress up with a bit of style even when I am just running errands. I usually spend 3 mins max cuz good style is already enough for me. And I never wear make up cuz I don't see much difference but just a waste of time.
- I love travelling (and that's what I'm doing now) and always want a travel mate even if for just a day. But when I feel I stick to a person for too long, I wanna run away (for a while at least)
- (no bragging) Quite a lot of guys are interested in me (I didn't try to get their attention) and when I feel that they keep looking at me, I tend to push them away or shy myself away. (Or maybe this is because I am E4 or INFx) That's why although I always want a partner, I have been single for like 3 years
- I don't know why every time I introduce myself to an so/sp, they seems intimidated to me (or I simply get it wrong?)
- I dated a few sx/sp so far and I never want to date them again. They have too much negativity and too complainy to me, even tho they don't mean to
- Bargaining in the market makes no sense at all to me. If I don't like the price I just go. No waste of time.
- Same as in a party. If I can't find anyone to have a good conversation with, I just go home even if alone.
- When I like something, I keep doing it over and over and over again until I feel bored and that's the time I completely turn to something else. And the loop begins, again.
- The biggest difference between sx/so and sx/sp to me is. Sx/so never really dress up well unless they have to, sx/sp never aware of what others think unless they have to. But both are aggressive.

U sure u're not some ExxP extrovert? With that dressing and traveling thing you seem to have a more pragmatic, extroverted focus. ESFP, ESTP.
I've recently met an intense ESTP-ish girl on the street. And I'll be damned, she was the one who initiated. I believe one in my study group is an ESTP but she's more aristocratic, into her girlfriends, girlyish girl, not one to wander alone. But you sure seem spunky by what you're writing, like that the girl on the street - we talked for 1 hour straight on the corner (which for being strangers in the alienated Western world really means sthing). But she had the same issue: "But when I feel I stick to a person for too long, I wanna run away (for a while at least)"
"when I feel that they keep looking at me, I tend to push them away or shy myself away." I didn't bring up relationship just to make a new friend, but she still hesitated and in the end turned to leave curtly.

I guess ExxPs have a stronger 7, like to try out things without being bogged down by commitments. You guys are butterflies but the more boyish, individualistic ESxP girls really feel an instinctive resistance against being dominated. By a guy.

"- I dated a few sx/sp so far and I never want to date them again. They have too much negativity and too complainy to me, even tho they don't mean to"

Fierce individualism, yeah but not bc of the 4. 4s like to hear each other out for their complaints. Except when they don't jive well at all. But Sx/Sp men have a lot to complain, nevertheless, we face tons of rejection and being alone for most of us is not just a matter of a couple of years but a whole lifetime.

[Neokortex]

You can recommend whatever you want. But I am old enough and wise enough to know who the fuck I am so don't think you can come on here and tell me who I am based on my response. It just makes you look completely ignorant of reality. I was trying to be polite but fuck it. I recoiled from you specifically.

I think you should consider your self-typing because it doesn't make sense.

p.s. You are LSE

Na, I think we should both keep it polite. In the long run, I mean. So u think ESTJ? Notice that I recommended a typing instead of asserting it. So the bolded section is actually sthing I could throw back at you. But instead... I recommend another typing DD Have you considered w8 to your 9? The 8s' aggression can seem transgressive, often leading to confusion w/ Sx. Sorry if it weren't clear from the beginning: I'm just theorizing, take it or leave it.

(Btw, others have also told me I'm very direct, perhaps rigidly; I owe it to my harsh debates w/ my ISTJ mom. My gut type E1 against her E8.)

[Aylen]

Na, I think we should both keep it polite. In the long run, I mean. So u think ESTJ? Notice that I recommended a typing instead of asserting it. So the bolded section is actually sthing I could throw back at you. But instead... I recommend another typing DD Have you considered w8 to your 9? The 8s' aggression can seem transgressive, often leading to confusion w/ Sx. Sorry if it weren't clear from the beginning: I'm just theorizing, take it or leave it.

(Btw, others have also told me I'm very direct, perhaps rigidly; I owe it to my harsh debates w/ my ISTJ mom. My gut type E1 against her E8.)

Yes, I recommend that you try to introspect, although I imagine it will be difficult for you at first. With enough effort, and a few years, you might actually learn something about yourself, once you strip down to your core. Seems you might want to be your own dual. Perhaps it is your idealized image of self, since you vibe Ni polr to me. ESE is another option you might want to consider.

Thanks for your suggestions but I have probably been doing this longer than you have. Self-awareness is not an issue for me. Also have you considered that you being sx last, it gets you horny reading about other people's sx adventures? You are practically begging for it. I could possibly find amusement on another day but not this one. This is not an assertion. I am just recommending you consider other options. EII seems off, don't you think?

[noguchi]

U sure u're not some ExxP extrovert? With that dressing and traveling thing you seem to have a more pragmatic, extroverted focus. ESFP, ESTP.

I am 100% sure that I have no Se Ni. Travelling is more an escape from my hometown than something experiential to me for the moment (it is getting more experiential tho, lol)
Example, I recently met an ESFP girl. We traveled together for few days. She always got something on her checklist for each city, what to do, where to go, etc. When she finishes everything, she goes to the next place. I never feel bored with her as a travel mate, but a bit exhausted with that "keep moving" thing of extroverted sensing. And her sort of inferior Ni is quite apparent to me, symbolic tattoos everywhere, she spent a whole day looking for a fire buddha statue (which everyone thinks it looks like from anime). I myself would just enjoy whatever comes to me. Be a lazy fuck read all day on the internet (i just read whatever comes to my screen) and get stuck on bed when I feel tired or just wanna be lazy.
My Si also comes before Te. I wish I could be carefree like Ne-dom are. But their lack of Si is also what I worry about them. One of my best friends is an ENFP politician very famous in my home country, I always have to remind her this and that so that she will not fall into traps (even when I am away now!). However, she is way better and more creative than I am on how to make things happen.
I think travel does help opening up my extroverted side (even tho I have been doing this for few weeks only lol). Regarding spunky or not, I guess this is just my style of talking especially as I grow older and more open up and give less shit. (Indeed I know a few of ESxP sx/so and we all like each other very much.) Imagine I was born and raised in Far East (full of confucian BS there). All my western ex-colleagues think that I am very aggressive. Some of them even asked me "where are you from" after working with me for months or years in my hometown and my face was usually like "fuck you where do you think I am from?!?!?!"

I guess ExxPs have a stronger 7, like to try out things without being bogged down by commitments. You guys are butterflies but the more boyish, individualistic ESxP girls really feel an instinctive resistance against being dominated. By a guy.

I am pretty sure I am not 7. (I love 7s tho) You can never find a selfie of me or any party pics on my facebook and instagram, which are constantly described as "very deep" (idk why tho). Most of them are just pics of back streets, sceneries, moody stuff, daily lives, funny creepy local stuff of my trip, etc. And also lots of my rants of my hometown especially on politics and linguistics.
Sometimes I do enjoy being dominated by a guy especially in bed lol. Kind of like "own me please I am yours". But not being controlled. I hate people telling me what is right what is wrong especially in social occasions. I would do anything to shut their fuck up.

But Sx/Sp men have a lot to complain, nevertheless, we face tons of rejection and being alone for most of us is not just a matter of a couple of years but a whole lifetime.

I am not sure if sx/sp guys are really rejected too much or they just *feel* that they were rejected. All the sx/sp I have dated are prone to be the latter and they assume "no chance for me" and they just let it happen. Even though as a matter of fact they all have great look great personality great sense of humor and I bet most girls would be crazy about them or maybe even too shy to talk to them. Even if I ask them out, I ask them for contact, even sex with few of them, they are all still like "it's over" "nice guy finish last". Seriously IDK what fuck they are thinking. Maybe too much self-preservation.
Complaints ... I had the same problem in the past. Sx/sp tend to complain about everything, no matter how good and flawless it is.

[silke]

Former U.S. Defense Secretary William (Bill) J. Perry - the "seducer" sx/sp stacking.

[noguchi]

^ no he is neither intense nor seductive ...

[silke]

^ no he is neither intense nor seductive ...

lol neither are you

[noguchi]

lol neither are you

I never said that I am lol

Sent from my SM-G9200 using Tapatalk

[Neokortex]

I'll try and I'll get back to you with that. Meanwhile, let's not digress. Isolating So types from So blind spots is for intellectual progress. It's for the people who don't feel uncomfortable with that.

I have been very open about myself with select people on this forum and as far as I am concerned those are the people who cared enough to get to know me and not use me as a social experiment.

Also have you considered that you being sx last, it gets you horny reading about other people's sx adventures? You are practically begging for it.

The (gut-type-) lust rhetoric you use there suggest that you don't like social experiments because the people who cared enough to get to know you are not supposed to get to know your gut sphere (E9 surfeit?) as well. You put social harmony (Fe) ahead of transparency (Se). I think that falls in line with the symbiotic nature of IEIs.

[Olimpia]

[Olimpia]

 

[maniac]

[Olimpia]

[Olimpia]

This is entire image is very Contraflow, imo.

[Neokortex]

She always got something on her checklist for each city, what to do, where to go, etc. When she finishes everything, she goes to the next place. I never feel bored with her as a travel mate, but a bit exhausted with that "keep moving" thing of extroverted sensing. And her sort of inferior Ni is quite apparent to me, symbolic tattoos everywhere, she spent a whole day looking for a fire buddha statue (which everyone thinks it looks like from anime). I myself would just enjoy whatever comes to me. Be a lazy fuck read all day on the internet (i just read whatever comes to my screen) and get stuck on bed when I feel tired or just wanna be lazy.
My Si also comes before Te. I wish I could be carefree like Ne-dom are.

- When I want something, I just go straight for it right here right now, what others think never comes to my mind (not that I don't know how they will think or I don't give shit about it, it just doesn't come to my mind until it's too late or I am reminded)

Didn't I see you indicating INFJ somewhere? Your Si coming before Te. Now that's interesting. You don't have Enneagram 9 but you still claim yourself to be lazy?
Do you go after things you want just like that because you inherently feel you deserve them?

Regarding spunky or not, I guess this is just my style of talking especially as I grow older and more open up and give less shit. (Indeed I know a few of ESxP sx/so and we all like each other very much.) Imagine I was born and raised in Far East (full of confucian BS there). All my western ex-colleagues think that I am very aggressive. Some of them even asked me "where are you from" after working with me for months or years in my hometown and my face was usually like "fuck you where do you think I am from?!?!?!"

Could you expand on that "Confucian BS" thing? You say your culture values people to be more timid, reverent, then you're the odd one out? How does you directness relate to your laziness?

I am pretty sure I am not 7. (I love 7s tho) You can never find a selfie of me or any party pics on my facebook and instagram, which are constantly described as "very deep" (idk why tho). Most of them are just pics of back streets, sceneries, moody stuff, daily lives, funny creepy local stuff of my trip, etc. And also lots of my rants of my hometown especially on politics and linguistics.

If you have Social instinct as a blind spot, than why do you keep social media sites and why do you have them updated? Especially on local politics news? Linguistics you say? Do you have some Noam Chomsky posted?

Sometimes I do enjoy being dominated by a guy especially in bed lol. Kind of like "own me please I am yours". But not being controlled.

Do you also have sexual preferences on how guys should look?

I hate people telling me what is right what is wrong especially in social occasions. I would do anything to shut their fuck up.

Quite a lot of guys are interested in me (I didn't try to get their attention) and when I feel that they keep looking at me, I tend to push them away or shy myself away.

How do you push guys away? Are you aggressive with them? Do you think you have Enneagram 8 somewhere, perhaps as a wing?

I am not sure if sx/sp guys are really rejected too much or they just *feel* that they were rejected. All the sx/sp I have dated are prone to be the latter and they assume "no chance for me" and they just let it happen. Even though as a matter of fact they all have great look great personality great sense of humor and I bet most girls would be crazy about them or maybe even too shy to talk to them. Even if I ask them out, I ask them for contact, even sex with few of them, they are all still like "it's over" "nice guy finish last". Seriously IDK what fuck they are thinking. Maybe too much self-preservation.
Complaints ... I had the same problem in the past. Sx/sp tend to complain about everything, no matter how good and flawless it is.

Well my case is... I'm rejected... either because of not having luck... or because I'm too intimidating and the person shies away and lies about having already a bf or not wanting a relationship. Or I'm rejected bc I'm from an underprivileged country and they don't like immigrants. In any case, I had experience of turning on women, I actually have a feel when they become interested; however, being the "lonewolf" for man is a different thing. We are rejected or ghosted bc the girl does not want to be a "partner in crime." Hence I assume the guys you're referring to weren't Sx/Sps at all. I think we'd all die to have someone ask our contact or offered sex occasionally, even if it only meant self-confidence boost. Thus, your remark "they assume 'no chance for me' and they just let it happen" is unrealistic. It's a "two way street;" that's how I treat relationships; I don't fight harder for a girl than the effort she puts into the relationship.

[Olimpia]

[Pallas]

[maniac]

This is entire image is very Contraflow, imo.

its sx. sx have no morals. : )

I think the picture really just sums up nature vs society, the way men in religion tries to take female sexual power away, but it will always be there and reign, because you cant beat nature. Its called *mother* earth for a reason.

[Olimpia]

its sx. sx have no morals. : )

I think the picture really just sums up nature vs society, the way men in religion tries to take female sexual power away, but it will always be there and reign, because you cant beat nature. Its called *mother* earth for a reason.

The only way I could see that as an Sx/Sp thing is typing the woman only.

The woman is certainly SO blindspot, whereas the man is So/Sp 1 probably.

The text above is from the perspective of the So/Sp guy, so that is why I found the image rather contraflow.

P.S: Sx can have morals. Sx/So usually does (esp. social morals... a lot of, if not most of morality is very Social).
Sx/Sp, much less so - probably an SO blindspot thing. For example, Sx/So would be much more concerned about what society thinks of their partner than an Sx/Sp. Many Sx/So guys I have known are wary of big age differences, for example. One guy in particular had an issue with the fact I was (just) 4-5 years younger than him, ha! He was also younger (in his 20s), but still. Whereas the Sx/Sp guys who were trying to "romance" me had no sense of social shame whatsoever. One of them was like 14-16 years older when I was 18, and another guy was in his 40s. They don't really care about social customs (esp. when it comes to dating), haha.

[maniac]

The only way I could see that as an Sx/Sp thing is typing the woman only.

The woman is certainly SO blindspot, whereas the man is So/Sp 1 probably.

The text above is from the perspective of the So/Sp guy, so that is why I found the image rather contraflow.

P.S: Sx can have morals. Sx/So usually does (esp. social morals... a lot of, if not most of morality is very Social).
Sx/Sp, much less so - probably an SO blindspot thing. For example, Sx/So would be much more concerned about what society thinks of their partner than an Sx/Sp. Many Sx/So guys I have known are wary of big age differences, for example. One guy in particular had an issue with the fact I was (just) 4-5 years younger than him, ha! He was also younger (in his 20s), but still. Whereas the Sx/Sp guys who were trying to "romance" me had no sense of social shame whatsoever. One of them was like 14-16 years older when I was 18, and another guy was in his 40s. They don't really care about social customs (esp. when it comes to dating), haha.

I just meant sx as an isolated instinct is not moralistic, and yes im talking about the girl haha

[Olimpia]

[Olimpia]

[Chae]

I luv that do you know where it's from?

[Chae]

[maniac]

Why is this sx/sp? Seems more sx/so or so/sx: flying in the air and lacking ground.

[Olimpia]

[Aylen]

I'll try and I'll get back to you with that. Meanwhile, let's not digress. Isolating So types from So blind spots is for intellectual progress. It's for the people who don't feel uncomfortable with that.

The (gut-type-) lust rhetoric you use there suggest that you don't like social experiments because the people who cared enough to get to know you are not supposed to get to know your gut sphere (E9 surfeit?) as well. You put social harmony (Fe) ahead of transparency (Se). I think that falls in line with the symbiotic nature of IEIs.

So what you are saying is that your social instinct is a bit neurotic? <-- Notice I am not asserting here.

Since you already mentioned me being a possible 5 and also an 8 wing (I think the 9 in my tritype can flip wings to suit my purposes), these are things I have considered already so you are not giving me anything new to consider.

I think I explained this clearly in another thread which I linked you to in this thread but I will just quote it for you here so we can be done with this.

I have associated my stacking in relation to my tritype. I think it is what makes the most sense for me. I also liked this article on the instincts even though I do not agree with it completely.

My instincts would basically work in the following way.

Core 4w5
• SX: Competition (compulsive comparing of self and other) <-- It is what it is. :/

Secondary 5w4:
• SP: “My home, my castle” (safe, hidden place—not family!) <-- I lock my door when I do not want to be bothered at all. I am around a couple of introverts so not a problem. No real stress to speak of as of now.

Tertiary 9w1:
• SO: Participation (careful to avoid the center, don’t want to get really involved) <-- exactly

http://www.enneagram-monthly.com/subtypes.html

Sexual 4s: Sx 4 is truly one of the more misunderstood combinations and the least represented in the popular E literature on 4. I recommend our mp3s, 'On All 4s' for a deep dive into Sx 4s and the other instinct combos as well. I find it helpful to go back to basics when trying to get inside a type and understand or predict behavior. We have to go back to motivation. First, the Sx version of all the types is the more aggressive version. It's like the hunter dog. If we look at Sx and 4 coming together as a formula, it looks like this: The core fear which creates the motivation for Sx is, 'I am ok if my intimate relationships are ok, I must have a mate to survive' This applies to anyone the Sx has made that bond with, not just a sexual partner. The core fear as reported by 4s, is of being inadequate, flawed, defective or emotionally abandoned. So, Sx 4 is someone who fears having their types core fear triggered by those in their intimate circle, those they have 'bonded' to. I like to teach when asked how one knows their Instinct, that it's helpful to ask the question, 'what makes you behave badly?' the Instinct is a survival mechanism, so when it's triggered our type/Tritype steps in address the issue. So I behave the worst as an sx4 if I feel, 'inadequate, flawed, defective or emotionally abandoned' by an intimate. This could be Katherine, my parents whom I am close to, childhood friends, or my spiritual teacher. The Sx4 is the 'counter envy' 4. They are more assertive than the other 4s, and also more emotionally over the top in their reactivity. -D

https://www.facebook.com/Enneagram.Explorations/

4

Sexual/Self-pres
This is a very volatile type. They are driven to form connections but have very high demands of their partners. When their powerful fantasies don’t match reality, they become very restless. They take the fire and passion of the sexual instinct and turn it inward. This can cause both brooding and fiery outbursts. Dramatic mood swings are very likely with this type. This subtype of Four could be considered the most classic Four, because of the way they seem to embody the archetype of the tortured artist, although not all Fours of this subtype are artists. Stereotype aside, this subtype does tend to bring their emotions into focus more readily then the other subtypes of Four. What is under the surface with the self-pres/sexual is now bubbling to the surface. This subtype can resemble type Seven because of their drama, passion for experience and tendency to suffer from frustration when life seems dull. Like type Seven, they can seem to throw themselves into experience.

When healthy, this subtype learns to balance the need for passion with the less obvious need for groundedness which can come from solid and focused relationships with others and with their creative outlets.

5

Self-pres/Sexual
This subtype, like the self-pres/social, is more typical of the depictions of type Five. The self-preservational instinct accentuates the self-contained, withdrawing tendencies of the Five. Fives of this subtype love their time alone with a passion, and pursue it more actively even than the other subtype of self-pres Five, although with the sexual instinct second, they often want to find time for intimates as well. On the down side, they have more disdain for people and little use for the social aspects of life. They want to be left alone or they want to share their inner world with their intimates. The intensity of the sexual instinct is reserved for their intimates and even there it is sporadic. The self-pres energy gives this subtype a solid foundation and some degree of practicality.

These Fives are conflicted when it comes to experiencing and expressing emotions. They usually default to emotional repression and to detached intellectual analysis. This is a dynamic common to all Fives, but with the self-pres/sexual instinctual stacking, the balance of these forces is pretty precarious and it seems as though the scales are being constantly adjusted one way or another. As the social instinct is the least developed, the social arena gets the drier more intellectual approach almost by default.

9

Social/Sexual
This subtype is “everyone’s friend.” The social/sexual energy combines with the Nine’s merging tendency and conflict avoidance to create a subtype that is very charming and uses humor quite extensively to engage with the people in their lives. On the down side, they can be frustrating because they can easily lose focus when it comes to their life priorities. With the self-pres instinct last in the stacking, they have a hard time tending to their own needs. They drift, and tend to use their charm to get a lot of their self-pres needs met by the people in their lives. When the Eight wing is dominant, they sometimes even develop a sense of entitlement, though they are just as likely to return help to those they charm into helping them.

In relationships, this subtype can suffer from some of the same problems as the other social subtype. They usually fall into a relationship in which the partner pushes them to “do more” with their lives. This can be positive for both parties, but often ends up causing resentment to build for both partners.

If you understand how a tritype works then this will need no further explanation. Think of it a cycling through and each cycle lasts a bit longer than the one that comes after, sx>sp>so. Its never-ending but very useful in serving a purpose. I worked this out in contemplation during a 5 phase of the cycle.

Sexual moves to Social The sexual subtype (one on one) will seek the greater world or social arena to find a desired mate. The sexual subtype is normally happy tucked away in a secluded setting with one significant other. However, when alone or in search of a mate, this subtype will behave much more like the social subtype. One must be with others to find ?the other?. Once the mate is selected, the social activity will be replaced by the dominant drive for time spent in union with the other one on one. At first the sexual subtype may spend time with the potential mate in the company of others. They become a pair even in groups. Then when the passion for deeper connection is ignited the sexual subtype will want to bond totally with their desired other. When the mate is determined, the sexual subtype will return to one on one style of relating. Ideally, this is intense time spent with the desired other or mate. An area of pain and disappointment for this subtype is when they have a mate that is unwilling to pay attention to their degree of connection and intimately share their deepest and innermost thoughts.

http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...4-Pair-Bonding

So now you can move on to someone else.

[maniac]

I think Neokortex is a 5, or at least a head type, youre incredibly heady and obsessed with theory. Where is your 4 heart? Ive never seen any expression of emotion from you, only logical judgements.

whereas Aylen is obviously heart-y

[Aylen]