Dual or Benefactor: Which is more attractive?

[zelder]

I don't think I've ever been attracted to benefactors. I know two people that I think are INFp benefactors. One of which I'm almost certain is INFp. I don't respect either one of them. One is my wife's step dad and he's good at small talk and puts on a good show for people but its just that....nothing but a big show. In reality he's lived the life of a looser IMO. I've enjoyed conversations with him about a lot of subjects but all too often can't seem agree with him. I don't usually vocalize my objection because it never gets me anywhere with him.

[goggles]

Benefactor until they get annoying.

[Zero11]

Benefactor until they get annoying.

Yeah Benefactors are hot until they burn you

Ah shit I meant Supervisors

I´m not attracted to Benefactors

[Azure Flame]

I have never been attracted to LIE women. The thought makes me cackle.

ESE's however... hubba hubba

[willekeurig]

ILI has always been of the least attractive types to me, though I must admit my sample isn't very big. I tend to be attracted to people who are very physical, practical and somewhat initiative taking, but the ILIs I know are none of these. And many of them have an extremely insecure and/or depressed vibe to them. What comes to LSEs, the ones that are great are really great, but the ones that aren't often truly suck with effort.

[DirectorAbbie]

EII guys are more attractive than SEE guys. It may be different for the gals. But SEE guys often make themselves ugly on purpose.

[ashlesha]

the men i'm attracted to tend to be ip temperament and not ej temperament.
i never really notice entjs. or i type them wrong.

[krieger]

i'm weirded/creeped out by IEI more consistently than attracted. the Fe gets to me in a bad way.

[blackburry]

I genuinely suck at typing people.
except SLIs. they're so easy.

everyone else. i'm like, yeah. idk. same goes for strangers and after i've gotten to know them.

[Kalinoche buenanoche]

But SEE guys often make themselves ugly on purpose.

do you have any idea on why that happens? Also,you started a sentence with a But.

[Galen]

lol @ people making serious responses to a tcaud thread

[Absurd]

do you have any idea on why that happens? Also,you started a sentence with a But.

That's not even a sentence.

[Kalinoche buenanoche]

it is it has a verb an adjective and a people inside of it

[DirectorAbbie]

do you have any idea on why that happens? Also,you started a sentence with a But.

I think that's okay. My college English teacher tole me it was okay to start a sentence with "and," which is the same sort of word.

[Scapegrace]

I think that's okay. My college English teacher tole me it was okay to start a sentence with "and," which is the same sort of word.

My grade three teacher told me it wasn't okay to start a sentence with a conjunction.

It's not grammatically incorrect if that's what Jennifer was getting at, but it isn't ideal and I certainly wouldn't do it in academic writing. I dunno what Abbie's proffy was smoking.

[Creepy-pikachu]

I told myself that it is okay to start a sentence with Anddddddddddd, because its fine as long as everything needed is communicated clearly. The end!


Also, and, lol.

[DirectorAbbie]

It's not grammatically incorrect if that's what Jennifer was getting at, but it isn't ideal and I certainly wouldn't do it in academic writing. I dunno what Abbie's proffy was smoking.

He was a mormon LSE with a doctorate degree and many years' experience teaching high school, college, English, and theater. I doubt he even smoked turkey.

[717495]

I think that's okay. My college English teacher tole me it was okay to start a sentence with "and," which is the same sort of word.

Ending sentences with I, like I.

[Scapegrace]

He was a mormon LSE with a doctorate degree and many years' experience teaching high school, college, English, and theater. I doubt he even smoked turkey.

Oh. He was a Mormon. That explains everything since they believe a lot of stupid shit.

[Korpsy Knievel]

He was a mormon LSE with a doctorate degree and many years' experience teaching high school, college, English, and theater. I doubt he even smoked turkey.

Congratulations on making an actually funny joke, Abbie.

[mikemex]

I think it's a matter of having experienced duality before. I did as a child and I prefer dual company to anything else. But it depends on the specific person; I don't like everyone who is a dual.

I've been thinking that for myself, the ideal would be an SLI-Si who grew in an alpha family. I'm myself an IEE-Ne who grew in an alpha family and I absorbed good values that I'd like to match. I've met Deltas who were raised in Delta families and I don't quite like them, specially if they share subtypes with Gammas.

However, if not a dual I prefer the company of irrational members od the adjacent quadras, this is, SEIs, ILEs, ILIs, SEEs.

I can only take moderate dosis of rationals though. ESEs are controlling and manipulative bitches. LIIs are uncompromising nerds. EIIs are self absorbed martyrs (when not plain grown up kids) and LSEs are workaholic abusers. Obviously, I'm exagerating but you get the idea.

Betas are OK if healthy. SLEs can be quite charming and IEIs funny.

We can still be friends

I just need to meet more IEEs. I shouldn't let one ruin my opinion of them.

I find LIE histories quite entertaining and LIEs find my companionship and Fi orientation reassuring. It's just that any request for Si results in a PoLR hit so close relationships are difficult.

All in all, LIEs and IEEs make good friends I think.

[golden]

My grade three teacher told me it wasn't okay to start a sentence with a conjunction.

It's not grammatically incorrect if that's what Jennifer was getting at, but it isn't ideal and I certainly wouldn't do it in academic writing. I dunno what Abbie's proffy was smoking.

I hope you're kidding.

[Scapegrace]

I hope you're kidding.

I hope you're kidding.

Get out your Strunk and White. They agree with my grade three teacher and I about starting not sentences with a conjunction.

[Korpsy Knievel]

And I agree.

[Scapegrace]

And I agree.

Harharhar.

[Beautiful sky]

the men i'm attracted to tend to be ip temperament and not ej temperament.
i never really notice entjs. or i type them wrong.

it's more likely the latter

Yeah Benefactors are hot until they burn you

Ah shit I meant Supervisors

I´m not attracted to Benefactors

I was hot once.

[FDG]

Meh, no, ESTp women are too extraverted and love to play mind games.

[golden]

I hope you're kidding.

Get out your Strunk and White. They agree with my grade three teacher and I about starting not sentences with a conjunction.

I'm sorry to see you were not kidding.

[InvisibleJim]

I hope you're kidding.

Get out your Strunk and White. They agree with my grade three teacher and I about starting not sentences with a conjunction.

The Elements of Style (4th Edition) is only a guide for 'Murican english.

It is only a guide, not a rule book, such as the 'Highway code', which is a guide for how to 'drive nicely' in the UK, it is not entirely legally binding and many of the guidelines are regularly flouted, e.g. flashing of lights.

Infact there is no officially body which sets the 'rulez' for the use of English, whether they be 'Murcan, Pom, Jockish, Ozzish or Kiwi. This is in comparison to other less noble language such as the overly idealistic French with its 'The Académie française' or the overly rational German with the 'Rat für deutsche Rechtschreibung'.

Therefore this conversation can go on without having any definitive answer, but being Jockish and therefore more predisposed to Pommish when I'm feeling polite I will reference Oxford, which is of course the font of all knowledge on the use of the English language, despite it being a guide exclusively and not a ruleset.

You might have been taught that it’s not good English to start a sentence with a conjunction such as and or but. It’s not grammatically incorrect to do so, however, and many respected writers use conjunctions at the start of a sentence to create a dramatic or forceful effect.

Of course, as someone who is governed by Asociación de Academias de la Lengua Española and your friend being subject to the machinations of the Rada Języka Polskiego, I can understand that you may find free-form language an indigestible concept with your limited experience in its use.

Otherwise, welcome to the internet where the careful use of grammar is not regulated except by the anally retentive. And you are a grammar nazi, congratulations.

[Zero11]

I was hot once.

Benefactor not Beneficiary but it doesn´t really matter because I don´t want a second mother.

[Scapegrace]

Did you idiots miss the part where I said that its not grammatically incorrect and that one should only avoid it in academic writing? God job Jim. You spent half an hour writing something that agrees with what I took three seconds to write. You look super fucking smart.

This raving intelligence is helped by the fact that you apparently can't read and that you had to look up the most well-respect guide to writing in the English language.

[golden]

Did you idiots miss the part where I said that its not grammatically incorrect and that one should only avoid it in academic writing? God job Jim. You spent half an hour writing something that agrees with what I took three seconds to write. You look super fucking smart.

This raving intelligence is helped by the fact that you apparently can't read and that you had to look up the most well-respect guide to writing in the English language.

People with PhDs in all manner of fields, including English, frequently begin sentences with conjunctions in their academic prose. Mr. Strunk and Mr. White's little treatise could be called outmoded, but more to the point, its usefulness and accuracy were questionable from the outset. A good discussion of Elements of Style's problematic content can be found here.

A somewhat better but less heralded dead-white-guy-talking-about-English-usage-and-grammar book is Theodore Bernstein's Miss Thistlebottom's Hobgoblins.

If this were an actual debate or even a discussion, it would boil down to prescriptivist versus descriptivist takes on grammar. (Strunk and White tried, clumsily, to be prescriptivist. Bernstein was descriptivist.) But the citation of a third-grade teacher's admonishment, backed up by a book whose popularity fails to equal intelligence and accuracy, doesn't rise to the level of debate or discussion. It's mere Internet silliness.

[Scapegrace]

Okay fine. My English professors at Harvard and my boyfriend a who best selling novelist and award winning journalist all agree with me. Does that suit you?

If you don't have a compelling reason to start a sentence with a conjunction in academic or formal writing you should not. Period. The end. I'm not sure why you're having such a difficult time with this.

I don't give flipping shit if you do start every sentence you write with a conjunction. Just shut the fuck up. Get you panties out of your ass. You and IJ both look rather pathetic.

[mu4]

And I hate grammar nazi's.

And I hate writers that can write well constructed lines of prose wound up in a ball of venal nonsense, full of self-administered mental asphyxiation.

And the simple stories are the best, a hero, love, friends, a journey, no miracles but always magic, no easy answers but a few tugs of the string to untie the laces.

And I generally find my benefactors unattractive.

[Ginny]

I am more attracted to Benefactor.

To be fair, I don't have a lot of experience with duality... but the first time I talked to a benefactor it was like being punched in the gut, very intense... And from the descriptions I've read, duality is something you "grow into" over time, the effect of your dual on you is at first subtle and hard to capture.... the effect of the benefactor is usually instant respect and admiration for him/her. (but not always)

[Beautiful sky]

Dual!

Think about it. I'm the Delta NF; a mind of a person who wants relationships not to have people to influence or to have power and will over but people, family, friendships around for emotional stability. You ask how people can provide emotional stability; they can if you have the need to give, to create a microcosm of Humanity. A circle of love acceptable. In this way, I act to unite people, but never with future complaint that they are not doing something right for me and others (SeFi), but with positive potential, ever increasing hopeful adjustment of ethics and faith that different things should be tried to maintain these relations; in this way, I'm not black and white about what people do as being right or wrong as my duals are; I'm forgiving, sometimes excusing of others actions but never with emphasis on the "barrage" of problems created out of this activity (FiSe). My duals appreciate that about me, love, family, relationships they value, cohesiveness...it warms their heart and it gives me interesting people to be around.

LSE do a lot for me too. I get strait out nuts when I have to focus on my health and facts or dynamics (what to do next, sequence of decisions, considering factors, and deciding on a course of action - Te SEE also benefit from LSEs resolute and clear course of plan implementation here) and I let my duals direct me in this area; I would rather just detach my brain from my body and let them take it to the doctor and get it all figured out without my mind knowing and stressing about what's going on, but until that happens, we'll create a symbiotic relationship.

You don't take much with you when you go, not your possessions and trinkets, nice things you collect, you do need people who love you to joke around with you, to give you attention, hugs etc.

It warms the heart of this dual pair, the unity, family, and bond. Even if the bond is not realize fully in reality, real reciprocation, it's enough sometimes to feel, from actions of others, like family members that the person loves you or has come to love you and accept you. It would be nice if when people got together that they acted on this love, like making considerable gestures to this regard, maybe giving a hug and joking back without retrain and attention to "offending" (within reasonable boundaries, or maybe not ) but just be there.

[mu4]

I am more attracted to Benefactor.

To be fair, I don't have a lot of experience with duality... but the first time I talked to a benefactor it was like being punched in the gut, very intense... And from the descriptions I've read, duality is something you "grow into" over time, the effect of your dual on you is at first subtle and hard to capture.... the effect of the benefactor is usually instant respect and admiration for him/her. (but not always)

I think duality relationships can be hard to start esp for someone who's never experience one. All the duality relationships I know off started fairly late life.

[Dionysus]

Benefactor, but...

The Beneficiary thinks of the Benefactor as an interesting and meaningful person, usually over-evaluating them in the beginning. The Beneficiary can be impressed and delighted by their partner's behaviour, manners, thoughts and their ability to easily deal with things that the Beneficiary conceives as complicated. When partners are together, the Beneficiary involuntarily starts to ingratiate themselves with the Benefactor, trying to please them without any obvious reason.

http://www.socionics.com/rel/bn.htm

[Beautiful sky]

Dual!

Think about it. I'm the Delta NF; a mind of a person who wants relationships not to have people to influence or to have power and will over but people, family, friendships around for emotional stability. You ask how people can provide emotional stability; they can if you have the need to give, to create a microcosm of Humanity. A circle of love acceptable. In this way, I act to unite people, but never with future complaint that they are not doing something right for me and others (SeFi), but with positive potential, ever increasing hopeful adjustment of ethics and faith that different things should be tried to maintain these relations; in this way, I'm not black and white about what people do as being right or wrong as my duals are; I'm forgiving, sometimes excusing of others actions but never with emphasis on the "barrage" of problems created out of this activity (FiSe). My duals appreciate that about me, love, family, relationships they value, cohesiveness...it warms their heart and it gives me interesting people to be around.

LSE do a lot for me too. I get strait out nuts when I have to focus on my health and facts or dynamics (what to do next, sequence of decisions, considering factors, and deciding on a course of action - Te SEE also benefit from LSEs resolute and clear course of plan implementation here) and I let my duals direct me in this area; I would rather just detach my brain from my body and let them take it to the doctor and get it all figured out without my mind knowing and stressing about what's going on, but until that happens, we'll create a symbiotic relationship.

You don't take much with you when you go, not your possessions and trinkets, nice things you collect, you do need people who love you to joke around with you, to give you attention, hugs etc.

It warms the heart of this dual pair, the unity, family, and bond. Even if the bond is not realize fully in reality, real reciprocation, it's enough sometimes to feel, from actions of others, like family members that the person loves you or has come to love you and accept you. It would be nice if when people got together that they acted on this love, like making considerable gestures to this regard, maybe giving a hug and joking back without retrain and attention to "offending" (within reasonable boundaries, or maybe not ) but just be there.

I have expressed this sentiment several times.

[jet city woman]

I have expressed this sentiment several times.

Now you're scaring me. Do you "forget" things that are frightening for you? And just pretend everything is okay, when it's not. If you're detaching from self, no telling what may happen to you.