Am I an SEI?

[kittendioxide]

Hey. It’s me back again. Yesterday I asked for typing advice on here- thanks to the help of the people on here I was able to narrow down my options to LII, IEI or SEI. SEI still seems like a viable option, i wanted to explain why and maybe you guys can help me to decide whether to eliminate it, or if SEI is actually a better fit and I should disregard IEI in favor of it. I promise I won’t keep spamming on here I just wanted to see if you guys could help me narrow it down some more.


I should mention I have been typed SEI by someone else in a voice call that lasted a little over an hour. Im inclined to be somewhat open to their judgement as a knowledgeable person, they’d been studying socionics for around three years and they were a lot older than me. However I do not feel they were very thorough. They typed me SEI because i like to cook, I like cozy vibes, I’m polite and lazy and don’t look for the meaning behind every single little thing. I could very well be SEI, but if i were I feel like the reasons would be more complex and deeper than this- a little less stereotypical, so I wanted to expand on that here. Later on, they also told me to consider LII. Im fairly sure on Ti & Fe use, so this post will mostly be talking about the distinction between N & S.


-Yeah, so cooking. I’m good at it, I enjoy it. I can’t taste nuances or subtleties in flavour and can’t concentrate on what Im eating and what it tastes like and such so I bombard the food I cook with intense spices for a strong sensory experience, in an attempt to ground myself and feel something in the real world because I feel so detached from it. I don’t forget to eat, but I won’t know Im hungry until my stomach starts to make noises.


-I have a low tolerance for sensory discomfort. It can make me spiral into a childish rage and frustration, I can’t deal with it. I won’t touch food ever because the feeling of grease or stickiness on my hands annoys me so much, when i sit next to someone and their leg touches mine i get super annoyed. This, to me at least seems like a strong argument for SEI.


-I turn to nostalgic childhood media for coziness and warmth to soothe my inner hectic-ness, rather than the environment. I frequently rewatch movies that I enjoyed as a child - given that I don’t remember too much about them as if I did that would be boring. I don’t experience nostalgia intensely, but rather as a brief pleasant feeling.


-As for meanings, I don’t constantly think about the symbolism or interpretation of everything, i don’t think or talk in metaphors because that would be pretentious. However, this doesn’t mean that I’m okay with surface level and mundane conversation. In conversations I like to go deeper, I like to dissect concepts in society with others if they are open to it. I like to talk about things with no basis in reality - who do you think you would’ve been if you were born in the 16th century? what would you do if you had a time machine? talking about potential scenarios of a dystopian society. I don’t like hearing about how someone’s day was unless something exciting happened to them because that’s just boring. I am also good at assigning meaning to art- art that simply looks pretty is all fine and dandy, I’d rather it had a meaning, one that wasn’t cliche. I think a lot about the artists intent and what they were trying to communicate, I find it fun to talk about what I think the meaning was. With my friends who are artists I often tell them the different interpretations of their work and how it could link into one big intent. I like to write poems, though I don’t know whether others would perceive them as surface level. I’m attracted to symbolism of death and such and couldn’t explain why.




-I can predict how certain people will react to the things i say, I have a good sense of how the relationships of the people around me will unfold. I know what to say to make the group laugh. Of course I can’t tell my friends I just know that they’ll break up with their boyfriends in a years time at the start of their relationships because they’d take it as pessimism or something, but oftentimes i’m right about these things, probably from observing past patterns. I like steering people towards their own future visions, I like to think of these visions together with them, all the routes they could go down. I feel like i understand people well. Because I daydream about my own personal, idealised future so often I’ve always been detached. I am incapable of being present, it’s boring for me to focus on the present when what’s coming next is more exciting. The future has never scared me, I look forward to it. I’ve always been criticised for my detachment- my parents and teachers would ask me why can’t you just focus, pay attention to the world around you et cetera. Im constantly bumping into things, have a bad sense of direction and spatial awareness and can’t shut my mind off enough to focus on the present.

[Metaphor]

Incapable of being present doesn't seem Alpha, have you considered any type other than SEI?

[VewyScawwyNawcissist]

SEIs are good at shutting their mind off from what i know
they are stereotyped as being hard to wake up and falling asleep easy
this is my experience with my SEI mother

SEIs are not so good at making the group laugh and it may be related to personal biases/sense of Si (although if u manage to only hang around the kind of people who'd like the kind of humour u in particular are about)

-I have a low tolerance for sensory discomfort. It can make me spiral into a childish rage and frustration, I can’t deal with it. I won’t touch food ever because the feeling of grease or stickiness on my hands annoys me so much, when i sit next to someone and their leg touches mine i get super annoyed. This, to me at least seems like a strong argument for SEI.

this can be as much an argument for IEI EIE EII and autism

I’m attracted to symbolism of death and such and couldn’t explain why.

this doesnt sound SEI to me (except if SEIs keep it to themselves and dont talk much about it unless they somehow make it positive)

Incapable of being present doesn't seem Alpha, have you considered any type other than SEI?

disagree alphas are not special in that they dont struggle to be present

[kittendioxide]

Thanks. That’s interesting. Stereotypes are just that but I find that quite interesting. I am someone who has a lot of difficulty getting to sleep, and wake up multiple times in the night. Likely unrelated to type, but interesting to note. But yeah, this helps.

[Ikite iru]

You seem like an IEI

[VewyScawwyNawcissist]

how do u spend ur day?

[kittendioxide]

how do u spend ur day?

You mean like what do I like to do? I try to make it through work- not enjoyable. I spend the rest of my time destresing with things I like, writing if I’m inspired, playing video games, talking to friends. I try to enjoy my leisure time if I can manage to turn off my brain, usually I can’t though.

[VewyScawwyNawcissist]

You mean like what do I like to do? I try to make it through work- not enjoyable. I spend the rest of my time destresing with things I like, writing if I’m inspired, playing video games, talking to friends. I try to enjoy my leisure time if I can manage to turn off my brain, usually I can’t though.

do u VI as IEI or SEI

[kittendioxide]

do u VI as IEI or SEI

Personally I mostly disregard the visual aspects of socionics. It simply does not make sense to me how someone’s appearance can signify anything about their personality - seems like physiognomy to me and so I call BS. Appearance is genetic and environmental. It has nothing to do with your personality, but feel free to disagree with me on that.

That being said I VI as SEI, IEI and LII. I have IEI “narrow angular” eyes and it matches the description of my clothing sense. I have a roundness and elongation to my face that appears in the description of SEI, as well as expressive eyebrows and short stature. I have the LII “wagging” gait, walking from side to side and medieval looking profile as well as the description of stature, the shape of nose and chin. LII & SEI are the closest in terms of VI. I also have an average weight, not thin or fat- I suppose you could argue that I have a certain roundness in that my body looks more soft than it does sharp- except for my face which is more angular, defined cheekbones etc. but like i said i don’t believe in it at all. facial expressions, clothing sense and eye movements may be a very slight indication of personality sure, but I struggle to see how the size of someone’s nose would say anything about their cognition.

[crazymaisy]

Are you charming, can you be oh so charming to others? That's is very SEI, so ...

[AWellArmedCat]

@kittendioxide It still sounds to me like you could be IEI. I wouldn't type you as SEI just because you like being comfortable and don't like being dirty. That seems well within the scope of Role Si. I like cooking and being cozy too. Though for me personally I've always had a pretty high tolerance for physical discomfort when I directly mean to engage with it

Like there's this one hike I loved to go on not far from my childhood home which basically forced you to crawl under logs through mud, wade through waist-deep water, and scramble over dusty rocks in order to get to this one waterfall, and it was the best thing ever. I loved arriving covered in grime and then jumping into the freezing cold mountain water. When I engage with physical discomfort on purpose like that I can handle a fair bit. Yet I HATE the feeling of my hair being greasy if I haven't washed it recently, so I tend to way over-wash it which I know you aren't supposed to do, but I just can't help it

It may be worth noting some people here type me as EIE

In any case, I don't think your description here sounds especially SEI, but a lot of what you describe doesn't sound particularly LII to me either. Your Ti feels more like HA Ti to me now. I'd very tentatively type you as IEI so far, but that could still change

[AWellArmedCat]

Are you charming, can you be oh so charming to others? That's is very SEI, so ...

That applies to a lot of IEIs too though

[kittendioxide]

This appears in the description of both IEI & SEI so I'm not sure it would be important as you a distinguishing factor, they both use Fe. Is SEI somehow charming in a different way to IEIs?

But I suppose I have some charm. No one has ever told me whether or not I do, but I have been told by friends that I take on a “ringleader” role in groups and speak in a charismatic way. I think that’s basically the same thing as charm. I don’t want to give myself too much credit for this quality and sound big headed but it is one that I’m proud of lol. Certainly as a child adults would always talk about how polite and nice I was, but having to maintain that image frustrated me and didn’t reflect my real nature.

[kittendioxide]

@kittendioxide Though for me personally I've always had a pretty high tolerance for physical discomfort when I directly mean to engage with it

Like there's this one hike I loved to go on not far from my childhood home which basically forced you to crawl under logs through mud, wade through waist-deep water, and scramble over dusty rocks in order to get to this one waterfall, and it was the best thing ever. I loved arriving covered in grime and then jumping into the freezing cold mountain water. When I engage with physical discomfort on purpose like that I can handle a fair bit. Yet I HATE the feeling of my hair being greasy if I haven't washed it recently, so I tend to way over-wash it which I know you aren't supposed to do, but I just can't help it

Thank you for taking the time to respond in such detail to both of my posts, it’s been really helpful. For the sensory discomfort thing it may be worth noting that I do have OCD. Since my OCD isn’t centred on cleaning and hygiene I never know whether or not it’s the root of that trait, but I’ve always thought it might be. Perhaps it’s not so useful to consider. I relate to this point about not minding intentional discomfort though- I don’t have any specific examples but i’m mostly only averse to physical discomfort that is small and distracting.

[crazymaisy]

Gulenko's Manner of Communication IEI

In interaction, a notable trait that allows to reliably identify a person belonging to this sociotype - is an apprehensive, somewhat shy smile, that appears when the IEI feels agitated, or when the conversation subject turns to him in his presence. He is curious about all that is unusual and original. Inclined to sweet chatter about all sorts of interesting trivialities. It's difficult to focus his attention on the essential things.

Gulenko's Manner of Communication SEI

The SEI interacts with people at close personal distances. Usually he is sociable, charming, has friendly manners. Knows how to become liked, how to gain people's sympathies and trust. The nature of SEI's communication is very democratic. Despite the fact that externally the SEI may seem like a mild and soft person, he can exert pressure on others through emotions and words.

Comparing only Manner of Communication from each profile (IEI, SEI) how does that strike you? @kittendioxide

[kittendioxide]

Both fit somewhat, it’s difficult to decide which fits more so. The best fit seems to be IEI-Fe subtype from my own research, rather than either of these descriptions. Frequently I have seen the exact same words used in that SEI description to describe IEI too in different profiles - so how do we make a distinction? @crazymaisy

[Tallmo]

Both fit somewhat, it’s difficult to decide which fits more so. The best fit seems to be IEI-Fe subtype from my own research, rather than either of these descriptions. Frequently I have seen the exact same words used in that SEI description to describe IEI too in different profiles - so how do we make a distinction? @crazymaisy

You can't type yourself from descriptions. You have to compare with real people to actually get a feeling for what a type is and the functions. It's hard to know what exactly to observe in yourself and many people will look at wrong things. The type is such a basic configuration that we often disregard it. We just think that "that's how things are".

Si can be a little hard to become aware of because it is experienced as a kindof "background impression" of the environment that seems unimportant even though the person has a natural preference for this. It's too vegetative and unproductive. But, when you interact with some other type you can become aware of the contrast. Or if you interact with a fellow SEI one might notice that there is a similar orientation.

Or maybe you are some totally different type.

[crazymaisy]

Both fit somewhat, it’s difficult to decide which fits more so. The best fit seems to be IEI-Fe subtype from my own research, rather than either of these descriptions. Frequently I have seen the exact same words used in that SEI description to describe IEI too in different profiles - so how do we make a distinction? @crazymaisy

SEI and IEI share the hidden agenda of "to understand" with a subconsious need for Ti. This makes it a bit harder to decide between two different types like you are.

Basically, read all the profiles for IEI, then read all the profiles for SEI, then start comparing portions of a profile you identify most with (from IEI or SEI) to opposites profile that matches author's... does that make sense? Or take each profiles one at a time comparing if you wish.

[The Reality Denialist]

Getting agitated over Si sounds role Si even by Jung. Typical role.

[crazymaisy]

I can tell you from experience, my dad was SEI loved other people so much charming, and oozy so charming even to total strangers. A very extroverted introvert.

My daughter is IEI, she is polite to strangers but reserved like an introvert tends to be. She is like a typical IEI and spends a lot of time alone, her preference. Not a very extroverted introvert.

DCHN brings in more differences for sub-types to confuse deciding. Basically, looking at just the types SEI and IEI: are you fairly social, or do you have more of a prefer to be alone.

Do you daydream a lot, or not.

Social SEI not daydreamer

Loner IEI daydreamer.

Would either one of those divisions be more suitable to you than the other?

[Aquamarine]

I don't think being social or not is a good determinant of whether you are IEI or SEI.

For example, I'm SEI and very much an introverted introvert.

[kittendioxide]

By that description, the loner daydreamer fits me more without a doubt. As I mentioned I can’t get out of my own head. My charisma is contained within my friend groups - but to total strangers i come off as an awkward, quiet mess. I was always the quiet kid in school who got scolded by peers and teachers for not paying attention and daydreaming too much. @crazymaisy

[kittendioxide]

Getting agitated over Si sounds role Si even by Jung. Typical role.

Interesting, thank you.

[kittendioxide]

I’d agree with this. I also think SEIs are likely to be people who are stuck in their own heads and daydreaming a lot too, though you can confirm or deny that. Since you’re an SEI I wanted to ask about how you experience present-ness. Do you struggle to exist in the present moment at all? @Aquamarine

[Aquamarine]

I’d agree with this. I also think SEIs are likely to be people who are stuck in their own heads and daydreaming a lot too, though you can confirm or deny that. Since you’re an SEI I wanted to ask about how you experience present-ness. Do you struggle to exist in the present moment at all? @Aquamarine

Yes. I think it's something that a lot of people might struggle with. For me it involves talking things out in my head sometimes instead of actually experiencing it, not really paying attention sometimes when out and about that I miss seeing certain things, or even when talking to people sometimes I don't really stay focused long enough. I do daydream but I can't say how much as I've never fully thought much of it.

I also relate to the sensory issues. It's worse for me when it involves a lot of people just chattering. It's too overwhelming. I feel like screaming and yelling at them. I used to have to leave the class sometimes in high school because I just couldn't take it.

[kittendioxide]

@Aquamarine and this makes the distinction even more difficult haha. Are you able to focus on the physical environment at all? for me I suck at this and to this day I can’t even catch a ball and still haven’t developed a sense of direction, i’d really like to get better at it. I relate to the thing about people chattering - sometimes i can disregard it but sometimes it bothers me so much and I can’t even tell why. But SEIs being depicted as very “here and now” present focused people seems somewhat inaccurate to me. I know i shouldn’t bring mbti into this, but the ISFJs, ISFPs & ESFJs i’ve met (types i associate with SEI) have all had a disney princess-esque dreamy quality to them, including my closest friend.

[Aquamarine]

@Aquamarine and this makes the distinction even more difficult haha. Are you able to focus on the physical environment at all? for me I suck at this and to this day I can’t even catch a ball and still haven’t developed a sense of direction, i’d really like to get better at it. I relate to the thing about people chattering - sometimes i can disregard it but sometimes it bothers me so much and I can’t even tell why. But SEIs being depicted as very “here and now” present focused people seems somewhat inaccurate to me. I know i shouldn’t bring mbti into this, but the ISFJs, ISFPs & ESFJs i’ve met (types i associate with SEI) have all had a disney princess-esque dreamy quality to them.

I always felt it was somewhat inaccurate too but alas.

I think I can focus on the physical environment to some extent. I don't think I lack a sense of direction. Maybe I shouldn't say that lol. I've never thought I was bad at it, but I also never been put in a situation where I had to use my sense of direction. I've always assumed I'd be able to find my way but that's probably overestimating my abilities.

[kittendioxide]

@Aquamarine I doubt the sense of direction thing even has any real relation, it’s just something i experience that ties into my complete inability to be present no matter now hard I try - which may be vaguely linked to type depending on how you look at it. If you’ve read through my post (and it’s long, so i’d understand if you haven’t) i was wondering whether it was relatable to you as an SEI?

[crazymaisy]

IEI have a superior rich inner life, fantasy even, depending on what they ingest for hobbies.

Ni makes for visual rich imagination. That sort of daydreaming.

[kittendioxide]

@crazymaisy do you have any examples? I definitely live in a fantasy, for years I was unable to snap out of fantasising about an ideal future life for myself in the distant future. I built stories and scenarios for future me a lot. It’s cringey to talk about, but i was obsessed with this fantasy genuinely. Is this the kind of thing you’re talking about? But I think everyone experiences that to an extent, so what distinguishes Ni visual imagination from other types?

[crazymaisy]

@crazymaisy do you have any examples?

IEI - Thinking in pictures, feelings, ideas, building deep stories, all inside your head, contempative, but future optimistic in most things.

As an ILI-ni I have lots of pictoral imaginings, but more like reliving the past, imagining things that I didn't experience from the further past as if I did, the future as well, all in movie-like form. I'm always struggling to keep focus in here and now if I have to.

If you are S you would focus on things around you naturally. N de-focuses from reality naturally.

Gulenko's profiles have a section near then Recommendations for self-improvement. Both profiles start that as below, which may give you a better idea comparing them. The SEI food thing sound more like what you talked about. My daughter IEI is not a foodie at all. She can cook but doesn't like to, doesn't like to HAVE to. She makes cookies and stuff like that though, happily.

IEI
Your forte is developed intuitive perception that allows you to learn from the mistakes of the past in order to ensure a better future. You envision the future in optimistic terms. You are imaginative and romantic in nature, enjoy beauty and art in life. Your creative nature does not tolerate banality and mediocrity. You bring elements of elegance and originality into anything.

SEI
Your strong point is the ability to select for activities and occupations that you truly enjoy, which bring joy, enjoyment and pleasant experiences. You are irreplaceable for organization of leisure and relaxation with friends. Delicious food, beautiful tableware, interior design, as well as a warm, relaxed atmosphere of communication - this is where you show yourself creatively. You know how to derive joy from life and how to share it with others. You prefer a beautiful natural landscape that resonates with internal state of your soul to more active ways of spending your time.

[kittendioxide]

@crazymaisy very interesting what you said about imagining things from a distant past or future as if you experienced them but never did. I frequently imagine my life as a 16th century king or something like that, imagining what I would do. Or how I would function in some dystopian future as a completely different person. Is this the kind of thing you mean or am I way off? Sometimes i think in feelings that are impossible to verbalise, vaguely nostalgic. I’ve always approached the future with optimism and been excited for it to arrive, having a sense that everything will always work out no matter what. I am a foodie though, to an extent. I do not like cooking every day as it feels like a chore, but every few days I’ll have fun experimenting with a dish, making it look nice and taste unique. I have favourite foods which I get cravings for. I know everyone gets cravings though. I care little for beautiful landscapes and home environments and such. If my home environment looks nice it’s just kind of whatever, i don’t really care, it’s nice and all but i don’t go to effort to make it look nice- feelings of warmth come from within, not the external environment. I already mentioned that I can’t notice what’s around me at all, to a point where everyone notices and points out how spaced out I am and i’m constantly asked if i’m lost or get scolded for not focusing on the world around me. Is this similar at all to what you experience?

[crazymaisy]

@crazymaisy very interesting what you said about imagining things from a distant past or future as if you experienced them but never did. I frequently imagine my life as a 16th century king or something like that, imagining what I would do. Or how I would function in some dystopian future as a completely different person. Is this the kind of thing you mean or am I way off? Sometimes i think in feelings that are impossible to verbalise, vaguely nostalgic. I’ve always approached the future with optimism and been excited for it to arrive, having a sense that everything will always work out no matter what. I am a foodie though, to an extent. I do not like cooking every day as it feels like a chore, but every few days I’ll have fun experimenting with a dish, making it look nice and taste unique. I have favourite foods which I get cravings for. I know everyone gets cravings though. I care little for beautiful landscapes and home environments and such. If my home environment looks nice it’s just kind of whatever, i don’t really care, it’s nice and all but i don’t go to effort to make it look nice- feelings of warmth come from within, not the external environment. I already mentioned that I can’t notice what’s around me at all, to a point where everyone notices and points out how spaced out I am and i’m constantly asked if i’m lost or get scolded for not focusing on the world around me. Is this similar at all to what you experience?

I would hedge a bet then for IEI. Sounds right.

[Aquamarine]

@Aquamarine I doubt the sense of direction thing even has any real relation, it’s just something i experience that ties into my complete inability to be present no matter now hard I try - which may be vaguely linked to type depending on how you look at it. If you’ve read through my post (and it’s long, so i’d understand if you haven’t) i was wondering whether it was relatable to you as an SEI?

I think I relate to everything except the cooking stuff. Also the predicting things part. I don't really care about predicting anything. Only future I fantasize about is the perfect life I imagine for myself, dreams, goals and that type of stuff. Oh and hypothetical scenarios.

[kittendioxide]

Oh yes this is also what I meant by thinking of the future. I think of an idealised future life, which I don’t even know if that’s what people refer to with Ni. But instead of focusing on my real life I retreat into that fantasy lol. I think everyone visualises their future life to an extent, I just base my present off that as well and i don’t know how healthy that is. thanks for responding! @Aquamarine

[Lycantrope]

You mean like what do I like to do? I try to make it through work- not enjoyable. I spend the rest of my time destresing with things I like, writing if I’m inspired, playing video games, talking to friends. I try to enjoy my leisure time if I can manage to turn off my brain, usually I can’t though.

This sounds more Ne-Si to me. Which implies you are more likely from Alpha or Delta quadras and less likely from Beta and Gamma.

I don’t constantly think about the symbolism or interpretation of everything, i don’t think or talk in metaphors because that would be pretentious. However, this doesn’t mean that I’m okay with surface level and mundane conversation. In conversations I like to go deeper, I like to dissect concepts in society with others if they are open to it. I like to talk about things with no basis in reality - who do you think you would’ve been if you were born in the 16th century?

This sounds more Ti than Te. But a bit too intellectual for SEI. Have you considered LII?

[kittendioxide]

Which parts of the first statement sound like Ne-Si? Just curious as I just listed what I like to do in a day & my hobbies rather than delving into any personality traits and would like to learn to identify function use better.

I have considered LII, but I believe my Fe is stronger than my Ti is. Ti is not a constant mode of perceiving things for me- I don’t analyse every single concept I see, rather it’s something I engage actively and consciously for fun, to understand things better and to connect with others. I can analyse concepts alone, but I enjoy it most when I am talking to someone else about these thoughts, I kind of throw my thoughts at people which could be high Ne- after this i try to get to the core of analysis and figure out a main point, rather than having multiple points I always have one solid overarching argument which everything links back to and go back to the “core” of things. So basically I have a tendency to link all my ideas together into one big theory which I emphasise following the process of brainstorming, and I mould all evidence and ideas to fit that point even if it doesn’t fit initially I have a need to make it fit- all evidence has to tie into this big idea. My Ti is rigid rather than adaptable - I try to come up with universal laws for things and so subjective information can bother me as I am constantly searching for one real ultimate truth, and I have a tendency to use Ti to condense people into archetypes and understand them better to predict their behaviour. Ne seeking is also still possible as I have a desire to experience all that life has to offer in certain things i’m interested in- e.g. Im interested in foreign cultures, so I want to travel to as many places as possible before I die. I’m interested in food and cooking, so I want to try many exotic and unique dishes in my life. I also enjoy changes in life.
@Lincatrope

Apologies as I deviated a lot in my response here, I just wanted to give as much information as possible so that I can get a more accurate opinion from you.

[nickelslick]

ITT: LII theorizes why she could in fact be SEI.

Cut it out already.

[kittendioxide]

Haha I really don’t know about LII - my Fe is a strength of mine, though I do struggle with it at times. The only reason I could think of as to why it would be well developed would be some unconscious gender performativity shit. Im not just theorising that Im actually SEI based on nothing, rather I’ve been typed SEI by someone else who’s judgment I was inclined to trust. @nickelslick

[crazymaisy]

Haha I really don’t know about LII - my Fe is a strength of mine, though I do struggle with it at times. The only reason I could think of as to why it would be well developed would be some unconscious gender performativity shit.

What struggles do you have with Fe? Also, you do sound irrational over all, so LII would be out the window. Very IEI still to me.