Quote Originally Posted by Tommy View Post
:3

I know.

I think most ppl has unrealistic expectations concerning duality (or any relationship for the matter). Duality makes ppl change, grow and make them do efforts that otherwise they won't feel like doing.Nowadays ppl seem to look for love as they look for any other product, it must be perfect and instant.Today, all kind of relationship that involve "effort" means its not the "right" person for you. They bring that postmodernist perspective of duality when socionics doesn't even suggest that whatever they have in their "ideal" and fantasies is going to comply.

Romantic relationships affect the most intimate areas of a person's functioning, so dualization in this area will have the greatest affect on a person's life. The early stages of a dual romance may be similar to any other relationship where infatuation is present, but what is different is the psychological distance between the partners. The naturally close distance causes partners to relax internally and be more spontaneous than they would be in most other relationships. Duals quickly recognize that their partner is not overly concerned with their weaknesses and is not going to criticize sore spots. In romance dual partners quickly move from stereotyped romantic behavior to what is actually natural and sincere for them. Partners may find that they "discover themselves" through the dual relationship. By seeking out their true desires and natural tendencies and ignoring societal expectations, they actually enrich the relationship and gladden their partner. If a person has not enjoyed dual relations before, experiencing them for the first time will likely be a transformational experience. In the initial stage of a dual relationship, partners often "drop out" of society for a period of time to devote energy to the new relationship and the exciting process of self-discovery.

After infatuation diminishes, stable romantic relationships between duals generally grow into tender friendships with a strong element of playfulness.

Dual relations in romance develop partners' individuality, and different dual pairs may exhibit different external behavior. Some couples may seem like they fight a lot; in actuality, they are expressing emotions that neither partner takes personally, and letting off steam and demonstrating playful aggression may well be part of the "game" that the partners have developed. Other couples may seem businesslike or even disinterested in each other in public until you get to know them better. In each case, the couple's behavior will center around the elements of each partner's Ego functions — especially the base function.

Dual romantic relations can have elements of conflict just like any other as irritation and stress build up and the couple experiences external pressures. The key difference is the inherent psychological comfort level and the letting down of barriers that automatically occurs in dual relations. The conflicts that do arise are usually worked through carefully (which means different things for each dual pair) and ultimately enhance the relationship and partners' individuality.

Dual relations are a "closed system" in that partners in a successful dual relationship (see disclaimer below) satisfy most of each others' psychological needs and become a self-sufficient unit. They may seem closed off and inaccessible to some outsiders, but partners have simply become more selective about their activities and outside contacts as they help each other remove unnecessary irritants and stresses in their lives. Such conditions encourage self-realization, which requires focusing energy on things that are important to you and ignoring much else.

Some romantic dual couples who spend the vast majority of their time together may experience an "identity blurring" effect. In this circumstance, the couple may lose most sense of distinction between one another, functioning not as two parts of a whole, but merely as a whole itself. This can be accompanied by a distancing of the idea of the individuals' physical selves and names from the actual conception of the partner. This can eventually reach point where the partner becomes difficult to conceive of or even picture externally-- as though images of them or their name are actually referring to some third old friend whom the partner has not seen in a while. Duality in this form could well be termed "integration"; neither partner could fully define their identity without some inclusion of the other. source

I even get bored if the person is too easy to solve. My SLI is protective of me and super cool and logical and I honestly like that. I've always wasted my time with ethical women and honestly they bored me, and i don't like that ethical drama, it's not attractive, i have enough with that in myself lmao