When are you "ready" for your dual?

[Aria]

Comment below with your type and what you think will make you and your dual "ready" for each other. Or do you think this idea of "ready" is nonsense because it's duality and you don't have to be?

In other words, when can this relationship be the most mutually beneficial without descending into the hell that Stratiyevskaya describes between duals who (in my opinion) seem severely lacking in self-awareness or even basic human decency.

Musing how--at earlier times in my life--an SLE would have either scared or repelled me and I would have just ignored them. Now I've noticed that if I actually speak my mind to them it seems to change something in them, which was surprising to discover. (They actually think about the feedback I give! They actually LIKE my inclination to play psychologist and dig into their emotions. Mind-blowing...)

"Ready" for the IEI:
-A strong sense of self. This is essential but seems to take IEIs time to develop, unlike Fi doms.
-Not being swayed from their vision. If the SLE doesn't line up with the vision, it's not the right SLE.
-Personal boundaries that are enforced without apology. This seems to be one of the only ways to create real respect.
-A life outside the relationship (probably a good idea for all the types): healthy routines, friendships, therapy, exercise.
-The ability to be very, very direct. Again, this takes time to develop for an IEI. The Strat article describes the IEI (in what I would call an "unconscious" state) as someone who has to use emotional manipulation to get what they want from the SLE, but I think this is what fuels the unhealthy dynamic. Learning to be direct is the best.

Still pondering what makes an SLE the most ready for the IEI....