A male ISFp's road to self-discovery

[Creepy-ace001-notlogged]

Hi I am new to this forum. I have only recently discovered this personality type information. Since discovering what type I am, I have begun to learn many things about myself. It is all starting make sence now.

Many people don’t understand me, I think they think I am strange. I often feel as though people don’t understand me, and I often don’t understand myself. What is written is what I have learned about myself.

People lead me to believe I was passive aggressive, I’m not. I am very sensitive and only trying to protect my feelings, I can be hurt very easily.

If I am angry with you, you will not know about it, because I hate confrontations. People mistake this as passive aggressive behaviour, it is not. I am just trying to avoid a situation I don’t handle well.

I’m not insecure; I’m very sensitive to the emotions and moods of others. I react to your moods and feelings. Sometimes my sensitivity leads me to become overwhelmed with emotions and I need to withdraw to process those feelings.

If you see me walking around looking vacant and not seeming to engage the world, I am processing information that I have gathered. This is normal for me, let me do my thing, and I will engage the world again in my own time (my mother would often become annoyed with my seemingly aimless pacing around the house and stop me).

If you put me in a large group and expect me to perform well in the spotlight, you will be very disappointed. You are putting me in an environment that makes me feel unsafe and I will do anything to remove myself from it (my teachers would stand me up in class and ask me questions, this terrified me into silence, I got poor grades in school).

Others always seemed to do better than me in school. I was put in the “dumb” class at school. This made me feel stupid, I am of course not stupid. I was being taught in a way that was foreign to me. I needed to get up and move around and experience things for myself. Once you show me what to do I will experiment with it until works for me.

If you confront me and back me into a “corner”, I will feel threatened I will try and get away from you. Don’t be surprised if I just turn my back on you and leave. In extreme situations I will find it acceptable to lash out verbally and physically. I’m not doing this because I am a violent person. I am doing this because I am scared and may be confused about what is happening. Don’t confront me, talk to me and give me time to work it through, I'm just trying to protect myself.

Keep a look out for the little things I do for you, they are very important to me. This is how I show my love for you. Don’t think I do things for you because I want something from you. And don’t think I don’t love you if I do not say, “I love you”.

If you put me somewhere I feel safe and give me time to do my thing, watch me shine! I am very capable if you give me a chance, more so than you may imagine.

I am a very private person. Unless I know you extremely well and I trust you, I will not show you the wonderful world that I am capable of creating for you.

I love children and animals. It brings out the big child in me. If you want to see me open up, watch me play with a child. Don’t think I am not acting my age. Interacting with children and animals is one of the very few natural outlets I have.

99% of the time I have an idea, it may seem strange or odd (that’s not to say they won’t work). The other 1% of the time my ideas will be pure genius. Fortunately I am very creative and I have lots of ideas.

I am not lazy, I just tire very quickly in fast paced environments. I become overwhelmed with everything I am taking in. I need frequent stops to recharge myself in these environments. I really prefer a slower pace though and will perform much better in this environment.

All you have to do to make me happy is make me feel valued. Acknowledge me often, a smile and a kind word will do.

If you marry me, you need to understand I feel emotions very intensely. I may not always let you know how intense it can be. During lovemaking I am very vulnerable, it is a bonding time and I will actually allow my emotions and feelings to overcome me. This will be one of only times you will truly be able to experience how deeply I feel for you. This is very intense time and one of great intimacy for me and can often be more satisfying that the sexual act itself.

If I am stressed I will often lose perspective on reality. I may feel lost and lonely and although I may not ask you, or realise it myself, I need those I love to help me in times like this. Be kind and patient. Guide me and help me to work through my problems.

I have read that out of all the personality types, the ISFP is the least understood because we are so private and rearly talk about our true selves. Welcome to my world, it is one I have never let anyone see before.

[Joy]

welcome

are you an MBTI ISFP or a Socionics ISFp?

[ace001]

welcome

are you an MBTI ISFP or a Socionics ISFp?

MBTI. I have not heard of Socionics.

[Joy]

read these:

http://www.the16types.info/types-ISFJ.php
http://www.the16types.info/types-ISFP.php
http://socion.info/ISFJ.html
http://socion.info/ISFP.html

[Expat]

You do sound more than , so ISFp rather than ISFj in socionics. My father was ISFp and there are similarities.

[taz]

Hi and welcome. Good to meet you.

If you put me in a large group and expect me to perform well in the spotlight, you will be very disappointed. You are putting me in an environment that makes me feel unsafe and I will do anything to remove myself from it (my teachers would stand me up in class and ask me questions, this terrified me into silence, I got poor grades in school).

Yes I hate that when teachers do this to me also. Feel even worse if I have to solve a problem and show my work in front of class.

[ace001]

I did the test. I thought it was to long, and I don't really understand the results. The MBTI is a much easier and understandable test.

http://socion.info/cgi-bin/beta3test...302338737.html

[ace001]

Yes I hate that when teachers do this to me also. Feel even worse if I have to solve a problem and show my work in front of class.

Hi everyone.

Why do teachers insist on doing this? I also hated showing my work, if I did it. I hated school. Classes often board me, and I got betten up a lot.

[Elizabeth]

Oh good! Another ISFp. Nice to see you here.

[ace001]

Sensory-ethical Intratim (SEI) .

EDIT: the test says borderline IEI as well, but I doubt it. Your describtion sounds more like the SEI.

I haven't got a clue what you are talking about.

[ace001]

Oh good! Another ISFp. Nice to see you here.

I read that isfp' only make up 6% of the population. And judging by your greating, we are a rear bread.

[Elizabeth]

Sensory-ethical Intratim (SEI) .

EDIT: the test says borderline IEI as well, but I doubt it. Your describtion sounds more like the SEI.

I haven't got a clue what you are talking about.

Yeah, he's using functions to describe your type. I'm still having a hard time catching on to all the theory of Socionics. I learn better with specific examples...then I can see how it actually works. If I can see it applied practically, it helps a lot.

I read that isfp' only make up 6% of the population. And judging by your greating, we are a rear bread.

I think you make number 3 here at the moment. There was at least one other ISFp that used to post, I think she was a friend of Taz. From what I understand there are some types that have never posted here at all. So 3 really isn't too bad. Though there does seem to be a large number of INTj's and ENTp's here.

[Rocky]

Sensory-ethical Intratim (SEI) .

EDIT: the test says borderline IEI as well, but I doubt it. Your describtion sounds more like the SEI.

I haven't got a clue what you are talking about.

Sorry, that means that you are the socionics equivilent of the ISFP.

are symbols for the functions (SiFe).

"Sensory-ethical Intratim" is the socionics name. It means your base is sensing, and you have a prefernce of ethics to logics (F/T). The "Intratim" part means that you are an introverted person. SEI is the abbreviation for this type.

I am a Sensory-logical Intratim... (so SLI instead of SEI, and the functions , SiTe).

As for the type popluation statistics, we really don't know how they are spread out. Right now I am think more along the lines of the population being about 25% introverted... and maybe the SEI (your Type) is somewhere around 4% or so.. not sure. The Intuitive-logical Extraim (socionics equivilent of the ENTP).. or abbreviated ILE... is probably the most common type.. maybe by far.

Is that makeing sense now? Sorry if it seems complicated, it's really not that bad...

[taz]

Yes I hate that when teachers do this to me also. Feel even worse if I have to solve a problem and show my work in front of class.

Hi everyone.

Why do teachers insist on doing this? I also hated showing my work, if I did it. I hated school. Classes often board me, and I got betten up a lot.

Yeah a male ISFP. I don't know why, where I go to school. Some though just a way to keep the person awake and pay attenchin. I often get trusted by alot of teachers so I became the teacher pet. Yes class get me board too unless it art or P.E. class, but I like it being taught one on one.

[ace001]

"Sensory-ethical Intratim" is the socionics name. It means your base is sensing, and you have a prefernce of ethics to logics (F/T). The "Intratim" part means that you are an introverted person. SEI is the abbreviation for this type.

Is that makeing sense now? Sorry if it seems complicated, it's really not that bad...

Thats why I am liking the MBTI system more. If I am isfp, it just tells me I am.

[ace001]

I often get trusted by alot of teachers so I became the teacher pet. Yes class get me board too unless it art or P.E. class, but I like it being taught one on one.

Some saw me as different I guess, mostly because I am big. I was 6'5' by the time I was 15. I'm 6'7" now and have learned to use my size to great effect, but only if I have to. I always feel so guilty if I get into a confrontation and don't walk away. I hate fighting, but I do love to play fight with the kids. One of my friends calls me a big friendly giant

[taz]

Some saw me as different I guess, mostly because I am big. I was 6'5' by the time I was 15. I'm 6'7" now and have learned to use my size to great effect, but only if I have to. I always feel so guilty if I get into a confrontation and don't walk away. I hate fighting, but I do love to play fight with the kids. One of my friends calls me a big friendly giant

Ohh, I hate debates. Yes it fun to play fight though with kids, I agree.

[ace001]

Hi Elizabeth,

You are an ISFP female. Do you relate to my original post at all? or do you have a different outlook? What is diffrent between a male and female ISFP?

[ace001]

Hi Taz,

Are you tactile at all? I am always picking stuff up and looking at it, touching it etc... I also don't like being touched at all by people I don't know. I am even uncomfortable with them standing close to me. Often I am not comfortable with people I do know touching me or being close to me, unless I really like that person and then I will seek out being close to them.

I am also not very articulate verbally, but I'm OK in a medium like this.

I also get distracted very easily with noises and movements and I am almost hopeless in large gathering cause there is so much going on.

Are you the same? Is this normal for my type or is it excessive?

[taz]

Hi Taz,

Are you tactile at all? I am always picking stuff up and looking at it, touching it etc... I also don't like being touched at all by people I don't know. I am even uncomfortable with them standing close to me. Often I am not comfortable with people I do know touching me or being close to me, unless I really like that person and then I will seek out being close to them.

I am also not very articulate verbally, but I'm OK in a medium like this.

I also get distracted very easily with noises and movements and I am almost hopeless in large gathering cause there is so much going on.

Are you the same? Is this normal for my type or is it excessive?

Hi Ace001. Well sometime I'm tactile, say for sure I get easily distracted , like to day dream alot also. I don't like strangers touching me either, but was force to be hugged alot in the past so I kinda got use to it. If the stranger get too close to me, I feel uncomfterable also. I'm not sure if I articulate verbally or not to be sure. I get lost if there is so much going on around me fast. It probably normal for your type is my opinion.

[Elizabeth]

Ok...this is kind of long. I thought I would bold things I can relate to plus I added some of my own comments in blue.

As for differences between male and female ISFp's I'm not really sure what they are. I actually think you may be more sensitive than I am as an ISFp. I think I'm more of a sensing subtype, perhaps you're more of a feeling subtype.


Many people don’t understand me, I think they think I am strange. I often feel as though people don’t understand me, and I often don’t understand myself. What is written is what I have learned about myself.

People lead me to believe I was passive aggressive, I’m not. I am very sensitive and only trying to protect my feelings, I can be hurt very easily.

If I am angry with you, you will not know about it, because I hate confrontations. People mistake this as passive aggressive behaviour, it is not. I am just trying to avoid a situation I don’t handle well.This is exactly how I am.

I’m not insecure; I’m very sensitive to the emotions and moods of others. I react to your moods and feelings. Sometimes my sensitivity leads me to become overwhelmed with emotions and I need to withdraw to process those feelings. I'm like this sometimes. It depends on the person and the situation. I do end up feeling overwhelmed which will sometimes cause me to avoid a person after a super emotional encounter, but usually only if I get the feeling that they'll become clingy.

If you see me walking around looking vacant and not seeming to engage the world, I am processing information that I have gathered. This is normal for me, let me do my thing, and I will engage the world again in my own time (my mother would often become annoyed with my seemingly aimless pacing around the house and stop me).I notice that sometimes when I'm in a group I'll be less aware than other times. I feel like I'm in outer space and don't really know what's going on. Other times I'm VERY aware of what's going on around me. That usually happens when I have a lot on my mind. In that case what I should probably be sitting somewhere thinking rather than being out with a group of friends.

If you put me in a large group and expect me to perform well in the spotlight, you will be very disappointed. You are putting me in an environment that makes me feel unsafe and I will do anything to remove myself from it (my teachers would stand me up in class and ask me questions, this terrified me into silence, I got poor grades in school).In school when a teacher would ask me a question on the spot I would either never respond or say that I didn't know. I can't function when I'm put on the spot. I loose all concentration and I'm useless.

Others always seemed to do better than me in school. I was put in the “dumb” class at school. This made me feel stupid, I am of course not stupid. I was being taught in a way that was foreign to me. I needed to get up and move around and experience things for myself. Once you show me what to do I will experiment with it until works for me.I did just fine in school and got very good grades. I learn best when I can work with something hands-on and actually see how it works. When a teacher is explaining something I need specific examples of what they mean. I often have a hard time understanding when something is ambiguous. I deal best with facts. Math and History were my best subjects in school.
An interesting thing I do is make something work for me. For instance: I used to be interested in HTML. I would work and work and work with it until I got it to do what I wanted it to do. I wouldn't quit until I had it right. Also, a few weeks ago a friend of mine needed help replacing the cord on her dryer but couldn't get the screws to come loose. I had a very difficult time as well. There was a point where I thought I wasn't going to be able to do it and I felt so defeated, but I decided that I had to get it unscrewed. Eventually I got it unscrewed with the help of several different tools. I wouldn't give up...I made it work. I do stuff like that all the time. (Though I don't do that with people, it's quite the opposite with people.)

If you confront me and back me into a “corner”, I will feel threatened I will try and get away from you. Don’t be surprised if I just turn my back on you and leave. In extreme situations I will find it acceptable to lash out verbally and physically. I’m not doing this because I am a violent person. I am doing this because I am scared and may be confused about what is happening. Don’t confront me, talk to me and give me time to work it through, I'm just trying to protect myself. Often when I feel threatened by a person I'll avoid them until I feel as though things have calmed down.

Keep a look out for the little things I do for you, they are very important to me. This is how I show my love for you. Don’t think I do things for you because I want something from you. And don’t think I don’t love you if I do not say, “I love you”.I never expect something back if I've done a kind act. Never. Actually, I would feel bad if the person felt like they had to do something for me just because I did something for them. I'm doing it out of pure kindness and because I care. I will tell the people I'm closest to that I love them, like family and a few very close friends.

If you put me somewhere I feel safe and give me time to do my thing, watch me shine! I am very capable if you give me a chance, more so than you may imagine.

I am a very private person. Unless I know you extremely well and I trust you, I will not show you the wonderful world that I am capable of creating for you.I'm very private as well. Especially when it comes to members of the opposite sex. I'll let very few get close to me and I will let them close only when I have some sort of like for them beyond friendship. I won't let guys I'm not interested in get close to me because I don't want to lead them on and then have to deal with a very awkward situation if they decided they have feelings for me and I don't reciprocate. I know exactly what you mean in the second sentence.

I love children and animals. It brings out the big child in me. If you want to see me open up, watch me play with a child. Don’t think I am not acting my age. Interacting with children and animals is one of the very few natural outlets I have.I like kids...they seem to like me as well, though I don't normally go out of my way to interact with them. I like animals too, but have a little trouble with big dogs. I love cats on the other hand.

99% of the time I have an idea, it may seem strange or odd (that’s not to say they won’t work). The other 1% of the time my ideas will be pure genius. Fortunately I am very creative and I have lots of ideas.

I am not lazy, I just tire very quickly in fast paced environments. I become overwhelmed with everything I am taking in. I need frequent stops to recharge myself in these environments. I really prefer a slower pace though and will perform much better in this environment.I admit, I can be lazy. Haha. Though I know when I'm being lazy and often feel guilty about it. I can be ok in a fast paced environment just as long as I know what I'm doing and I'm confident in it. Though if a lot of problems arise I can feel overwhelmed and not know what to do first.

All you have to do to make me happy is make me feel valued. Acknowledge me often, a smile and a kind word will do.It really doesn't take much to make me happy, just do enough to let me know you care and are genuinely interested in my well being.

If you marry me, you need to understand I feel emotions very intensely. I may not always let you know how intense it can be. During lovemaking I am very vulnerable, it is a bonding time and I will actually allow my emotions and feelings to overcome me. This will be one of only times you will truly be able to experience how deeply I feel for you. This is very intense time and one of great intimacy for me and can often be more satisfying that the sexual act itself.I can't exactly say here, I've never been sexually intimate with anyone.

If I am stressed I will often lose perspective on reality. I may feel lost and lonely and although I may not ask you, or realise it myself, I need those I love to help me in times like this. Be kind and patient. Guide me and help me to work through my problems.Ah yes. When I get stressed I can really freak out. My friends can tell when I'm stressed because I get a little emotionally weird, normally I'm a very stable person, but when I get stressed I feel out of control and like I don't know up from down. I hate feeling that way and do what I can to balance things back out again and get back to stability. Even if it means suppressing emotions or feelings.

I have read that out of all the personality types, the ISFP is the least understood because we are so private and rearly talk about our true selves. Welcome to my world, it is one I have never let anyone see before.I don't feel misunderstood for the most part. Although I do have a couple of very good trusted friends that I can talk to about almost anything, so I'm sure that helps a lot.

[Elizabeth]

As for what you asked Taz. I really don't like to be touched by people I don't know either. I don't mind my close family touching me and some close friends...others I just feel weird about touching and having them touch me. But I won't jerk my hand away or say anything if someone touches me.

There's this girl I know who likes to sit on people and she'll do weird things like rub her butt on them. I absolutely cannot stand that. Ugh! She even licked my face once. That was really weird and it grossed me out. I've never said anything to her though. It just makes me really uncomfortable. Hmm...I wonder what type she is. haha!

[diamond]

I agree ewwwww.

[ace001]

Hi Ace001. Well sometime I'm tactile, say for sure I get easily distracted , like to day dream alot also. I don't like strangers touching me either, but was force to be hugged alot in the past so I kinda got use to it. If the stranger get too close to me, I feel uncomfterable also. I'm not sure if I articulate verbally or not to be sure. I get lost if there is so much going on around me fast. It probably normal for your type is my opinion.

Glad I'm not alone on this.

[ace001]

do end up feeling overwhelmed which will sometimes cause me to avoid a person after a super emotional encounter

I also try and avoid people if I can't read them. I am very uncomfortable if I can't read a person because I don't know where I am with them.

I notice that sometimes when I'm in a group I'll be less aware than other times. I feel like I'm in outer space and don't really know what's going on. Other times I'm VERY aware of what's going on around me.

I am always moving around in large groups. I can't concerntrate for long. I constantly jump from one group to another to see what is going on. I like small groups of 3-4.

In school when a teacher would ask me a question on the spot I would either never respond or say that I didn't know. I can't function when I'm put on the spot. I loose all concentration and I'm useless.

Yip thats me to.

I can't exactly say here, I've never been sexually intimate with anyone.

I've had sex but it was not fulfilling. I wasn't in a relationship with them. It felt empty because I couldn't connect to them. I haven't had sex now for almost 10 years. I'm just looking now for the right person.

When I get stressed I can really freak out. My friends can tell when I'm stressed because I get a little emotionally weird, normally I'm a very stable person, but when I get stressed I feel out of control and like I don't know up from down. I hate feeling that way and do what I can to balance things back out again and get back to stability. Even if it means suppressing emotions or feelings.

I have a real hard time coping with stress. I can handle pressure, I used to be a firefighter. But stress, especially for long periods, I tend to lose the plot. I have a great friend though, she is good at drawing me out and giving me a boost. She is really a good ancor for me and I am confortable talking to her. She drives me nuts though because she is so disorganized and always on the go. She's got no sense of timing at all and its hard to pin her down, but when I do, she gives me the time I need to vent. Even though she is a good friend, I can't even talk to her about how I truely feel. My original post here is the closest I have ever come to that.

[taz]

There's this girl I know who likes to sit on people and she'll do weird things like rub her butt on them. I absolutely cannot stand that. Ugh! She even licked my face once. That was really weird and it grossed me out. I've never said anything to her though. It just makes me really uncomfortable. Hmm...I wonder what type she is. haha!

That is gross . They would notice if my face turn red.

she is so disorganized and always on the go. She's got no sense of timing at all and its hard to pin her down

Then I would drive you nuts there if you know me in person. Well except that I'm usualy never on the go.

Quote:
I notice that sometimes when I'm in a group I'll be less aware than other times. I feel like I'm in outer space and don't really know what's going on. Other times I'm VERY aware of what's going on around me.


I am always moving around in large groups. I can't concerntrate for long. I constantly jump from one group to another to see what is going on. I like small groups of 3-4.

Same here. I hang out in 2 or 3 different groups at school during lunch.

[taz]

I can't exactly say here, I've never been sexually intimate with anyone.

ACE:
I've had sex but it was not fulfilling. I wasn't in a relationship with them. It felt empty because I couldn't connect to them. I haven't had sex now for almost 10 years. I'm just looking now for the right person.

I have strong firm what I believe about having sex. I refuse to have sex until I'm married , I hate it when guys play really dirty jokes or jokes about having sex with me but that just me.

But Ace and Elizabeth do you like to compete in sports or at least play sports. I do but I love it when the guys compete with me instead of going easy on me cause I'm a girl type of thing, and are good at making it a fun rival not hatred rival. Oh do you tend to get irritated when you see mistakes writing letters(I do but thinking that an NT thing) and end up correcting it at least 3 times? Last one do you often have trouble deciding on stuff or are very forgetful about doing things cause I do? Just woundering don't have to answer if you don't want.

[Elizabeth]

Hey Taz!

Yeah, I used to play tennis when I was in high school. I LOVED to play against guys because I could play as hard as I could and not feel like I had to hold anything back. I had nothing to lose so I'd do risky things and it helped me get a lot better.

Yes, I totally get irritated when I see mistakes writing letters, posts, emails, etc. I read over what I write several times before I'll send it. I too thought this was odd for an ISFp! So maybe it is an ISFp trait after all. Haha!

I also get annoyed when people write with abbreviations like...how r u? and talk 2 u l8r. I never say anything to people when they do it of course, but it's a secret pet peeve of mine.

I don't always have trouble deciding. It depends on what it is. Like if I'm out driving around and I want to stop and get something to eat, I don't have much trouble deciding where. Now if I was with a group of people I would have difficulty because I'd be worried that certain people wouldn't want to eat here or there. So in cases where another person is involved I have much more trouble deciding. I guess I also have a little trouble deciding when it has to do with BIG life decisions. I often feel afraid of doing the wrong thing and getting myself into a mess. So I take a lot longer to make big decisions.

I am forgetful about things. I'll forget that I've told someone I'd call them. Or I'll forget to do something someone asked me to do. Last month I forgot to pay one of my bills and didn't realize it until I received the statement with a penalty. But this is rare, I'm usually good with getting things paid on time.

Is there anything else you do besides checking over letters several times that doesn't seem ISFp-like? I'll try to think of some things I do. Maybe they're more ISFp-like than we think!

[taz]

That is sweet. Thanks. That helped.

[ace001]

I have strong firm what I believe about having sex. I refuse to have sex until I'm married , I hate it when guys play really dirty jokes or jokes about having sex with me but that just me.

I was young then but now I'm older and a Christian so sex is out till I get married.

But Ace and Elizabeth do you like to compete in sports or at least play sports. I do but I love it when the guys compete with me instead of going easy on me cause I'm a girl type of thing, and are good at making it a fun rival not hatred rival. Oh do you tend to get irritated when you see mistakes writing letters(I do but thinking that an NT thing) and end up correcting it at least 3 times? Last one do you often have trouble deciding on stuff or are very forgetful about doing things cause I do? Just woundering don't have to answer if you don't want.

I like to have fun, but I can get competitive. Yes I do get forgetful.

I just finished a job and now I am having a hard time desiding what I want to do. How do you deside what jobs you want to do?

[Elizabeth]

I just finished a job and now I am having a hard time desiding what I want to do. How do you deside what jobs you want to do?

I have a hard time too. Right now I have a job I like. Though, really, I need to find another that pays more because I can't support myself completely on my income. It's a huge circle for me. I like my job and I'm afraid to leave it for another because I don't want to get to the new job and find out that I don't like it or be there for a couple of months and find out that they're laying people off. The job I have right now is very secure and not stressful at all. I like that I don't have to think about my job after I've left for the day or on the weekends and I don't have a boss hovering over me all day, I'm pretty much left up to my own devices.

So basically, if I had to look for another job, it would have to have a lot of the qualities of the job I have now. Not stressful, secure, something I can stand doing (I don't have to love it, but I have to like it), no boss/supervisor/co-workers constantly telling me what to do, something that's busy enough but not too busy to where I feel overwhelmed, a job where I can leave my work at work.

As to a specific desire for a career, I don't really have one at the moment. All the things I really wanted to do kind of fell through, so now I have to figure something else out. I have no idea what. I'd have to get more education most likely, I have a very generic communications degree. I REALLY don't want to go for more education right now. So basically I'm clueless beyond what I'm doing at the moment and until I figure out something that I'd much rather be doing, I think I'll probably stay right where I am. Yeah, I'm sure it sounds lazy and unmotivated, but I really have no idea what I want to do at this point in my life.

[taz]

[quote]

I have strong firm what I believe about having sex. I refuse to have sex until I'm married , I hate it when guys play really dirty jokes or jokes about having sex with me but that just me.

I was young then but now I'm older and a Christian so sex is out till I get married.

That awesome cause I am too.

I like to have fun, but I can get competitive. Yes I do get forgetful.

I just finished a job and now I am having a hard time desiding what I want to do. How do you deside what jobs you want to do

Oh yes I can too. I have finally decided I want to be a P.E. teacher this year. I still wouldn't have found a college to go to if my mom havent been pushing me to find a college and scholarship. For a job to earn just money I haven't be push to get a job but I know for me also it would be hard to find a job I would enjoy in my town before college.

[snegledmaca]

After reading this thread I'm almost positively convinced I'm ISFp. Yeeey .

Oh do you tend to get irritated when you see mistakes writing letters(I do but thinking that an NT thing) and end up correcting it at least 3 times?

This is soooo true for me. Sometimes it can take me hours just to write a single post, but that has more to do with expressing myself and rearranging my thoughts so they appear consistent written down on paper.
At least three times double checking everything to make sure I haven’t missed anything in my expression.

Last one do you often have trouble deciding on stuff or are very forgetful about doing things cause I do?

Yes, very much, the forgetting to do stuff. Not so much on deciding. Sometimes.

[Elizabeth]

This is soooo true for me. Sometimes it can take me hours just to write a single post, but that has more to do with expressing myself and rearranging my thoughts so they appear consistent written down on paper.
At least three times double checking everything to make sure I haven’t missed anything in my expression.

Good! So I'm not the only one who does this! Oh man, it takes me forever to write some of my longer posts. I just keep going over it and over it. Sometimes I'll even email it to myself to look over later to see if I can think of anything else to change or add. I used to wonder if there was something wrong with my brain. I guess it just takes ISFps longer to get their thoughts organized and put together.

[snegledmaca]

Believe it or not that is soooo nice for me to hear .


I actually write all of my posts in microsoft word, to eliminate spelling errors, to rephrase wrongly phrased sentences, and then after I check everything I double check some more just to eliminate my paranoia. Then I put it in a new post, already finished, where I continue with several successive detailed inspections and tweaks of my post before posting it. Some final inspection is required after I post to guaranty that my post has been worded properly.

But I do none of this when I’m in a playful mood. Then I stop making mistakes (At least I think I do), I express my thought with crystal clarity and do not concern myself about it being misunderstood or wrongly phrased. And it never is.

[Elizabeth]

Hmmm...this is very interesting.

How about in school? Were you always one of the last ones done with tests? I did very well in school but I was almost always one of the last ones done with tests and in class assignments...those sorts of things. I always thought that I had some sort of problem, but perhaps not.

I think it just takes ISFps longer to get things sorted out in their minds to say what they really want to say.

I'm also a slow reader. I have to take my time reading to let things sink in. To really grasp something I have to actively think about it and maybe go over it a couple more times. It's like I have to put myself in a different mindset. Sometimes it's such an ordeal that I won't even bother. Like some of these socionics articles and such. It takes effort for me to really just sit and think about it and try to understand the functions and all of that. I learn best by doing and experiencing. So when I do post something here it's based on observations I have of myself or a person of another type that I know well. I can't really understand things like these intuitives and thinkers do, it takes me a long long time, it's like some other dimension...my brain just doesn't work that way. If I could just see things work rather than everything be so abstract, I would have a much better understanding. And it's not that I can't understand at all, it just takes extra effort and often I just don't feel like putting in that effort. Actually, writing all of this out made me feel kind of stupid, but that's not the truth. I just have a different type of intelligence that's not very well reflected on this forum.

Can you relate to this at all?

[snegledmaca]

I can very, very, veeeery much relate to all that you have posted.

Being that I am still in school I can tell you my first hand experiences. With the test, no, not really. I don’t really care because I have a reputation of being, well let’s just say ambiguous. People expect me to be that way so I feel no pressure to perform.
But, on the other hand, regarding things where my performance is a reflection of myself and not of their preconceived image of myself that I have presented them with, then there is a problem because my work can never be good enough and there always feel more room for improvement, or that something is out of place, or that I have missed something or something like that. All I want is to provide the person who is depending on me with a reflection of perfection, because it is only the best for them from me, when in need, they should expect. And get.

Lol, I also very much share your troubles with reading articles and heavy theory. It really needs time to sink in. It overwhelms me like water being purred into a full bucket. You said it best actually.

Like some of these socionics articles and such. It takes effort for me to really just sit and think about it and try to understand the functions and all of that. I learn best by doing and experiencing. So when I do post something here it's based on observations I have of myself or a person of another type that I know well. I can't really understand things like these intuitives and thinkers do, it takes me a long long time, it's like some other dimension...my brain just doesn't work that way. If I could just see things work rather than everything be so abstract, I would have a much better understanding. And it's not that I can't understand at all, it just takes extra effort and often I just don't feel like putting in that effort.

Also do you have a problem with being misunderstood and not voicing yourself? I get misunderstood but tend not to voice it because the other person does not, and often cannot or will not, understand me. I try not to force anything onto others. If they wanted to understand they would have attempted to do so. I present them with an image of that which they want to see and let them, in a way, choose what they want from me. I never object to their decision, but then again, I’ve never open up to anyone. I really should, I want to, but I find nobody desirable who is willing to know me. They are all drawn by what they want me to be.

Also, do you tend to repeat yourself? I do that a lot.

[Elizabeth]

Also do you have a problem with being misunderstood and not voicing yourself?

Hmm...well, when I'm misunderstood I usually try to correct the other person. Unless I just don't care. I guess it depends on the person and how they misunderstood me. If it's something negative I'll be much more likely to correct them. It's probably somewhat of a pride thing because I can't stand it when people think negatively of me. Yeah, so in a case where someone believed something negative about me, I would almost definitely try to set the record straight and try to fix whatever it is to get them think positively about me again. Then if they don't accept my apologies or whatever it is I offer to fix the situation, I let them be.

I don't try to force anything on others either. Rarely ever do I seek out friendships. The friendships I have right now either just kind of happened or the other person sought me out for the friendship. Also, it seems that with my friendships I let the other person call most of the shots and I'm usually game for whatever unless it's something I REALLY don't want to do. I might suggest things that I would like to do but I never push anyone to do what I want. Unfortunately, this sometimes leads to people taking advantage of me, but often I either don't realize it, or don't care. Only every once in a while do things get to a point where I feel really taken advantage of, most of the time I just don't care. When that happens I'll probably back off for a while, not answer my phone, avoid the person, that kind of thing. Then when I feel the weight lifted I'll come back around and act like nothing ever happened and things will go back to normal. To sum it all up, I'm a passive people pleaser who hates confrontation.

I also don't force my own opinions, values, beliefs, etc. on people. I kind of just leave it up to them to believe what they want...if I understand you correctly :wink: , perhaps like you said here:

I present them with an image of that which they want to see and let them, in a way, choose what they want from me.

I’ve never open up to anyone. I really should, I want to, but I find nobody desirable who is willing to know me.

I've always had a hard time opening up to people. I'm a very private person and have always been so careful about those I open up to. I only open up to people when I trust them, know them well, and they provide a safe atmosphere. It takes me a really long time to get to know people and let them get to know me. It does, it's so much effort. Right now I have two close friends I can open up to a dual (ENTp) and a semi-dual (ENFp). There is so much comfort in both of these relationships and I'm very appreciative of them. I would be miserable and lonely without them. I have complete freedom to be myself around them and I know they're not going to judge me or think poorly of me. It's so so so very nice. I'm sure you'll find someone to open up to. I didn't have these close friends until just a few years ago, or last year in one of the cases. They'll come along.

Also, do you tend to repeat yourself? I do that a lot.

Oh yes, all the time. I've probably done it several times in this post. I'm the queen of redundancy. I'll even do it in the same sentence. I think I do it to clarify, to make sure there aren't any misunderstandings or at least not as many of them.

[snegledmaca]

I have a long time ENFp friend who I know from a very early age. It’s nice with him and all but he doesn’t understand me. He says I’m an enigma to him. We have serious communication issues. It takes us hours to get ideas through. Well actually, it takes me hours to get ideas through to him anyway.

It’s not that I don’t appreciate him or anything like that, it’s just that I’m just tired of trying to be all these things I'm not. All I want is somebody who'll understand me and know where I’m coming from.

I always try to be what people want me to be. Maybe I’m wrong. I don’t know.

But I don’t know how to be anything else. All my life I tried not to be conspicuous, only lived on the sidelines. I know change must come from within me, but nothing is driving me to make such a change. All my hopes, dreams, aspirations go unrealized and all I can do is sit and watch as my chances, one by one, pass me by and can see myself one day standing alone yearning for those times when my future was full of possibilities.

The time to act is now. I know this, but still nothing happens. I cannot change despite my wishes. It frustrates me. It saddens me to. I feel let down, abandoned and alone where all I wish is a little glimmer of hope.

Blah, sorry for this rant, but I’m kind of frustrated with my life and my situation and need to vent my feelings a bit.

So anyway, describe me you mind, your thought process. I know I have a pretty, hmmm, *unique* way of thinking. So people tell me anyway. I want to see how well I can relate to you so I’m not going to post it now so I don’t corrupt your response.

[diamond]

*bump*

I just read this whole thread. You guys are so cool, over here having an isfp conversation.

I wish I knew some isfp's IRL!