I can't bear the pain any longer. I have some things keeping me going, and I overall don't want to die, but I know I'm better off dead. But suicide is a major sin in islam.
I can't bear the pain any longer. I have some things keeping me going, and I overall don't want to die, but I know I'm better off dead. But suicide is a major sin in islam.
Every time I see a Muslim Facebook friend expressing their wish to die, there is one thing that goes through my head: let's suppose you die, are you prepared for what comes after death?
Souls know their way back home
Good point. Allah promises that men will have 72 virgins, but not which gender they are.
https://viruscomix.com/page462.html
Narrated Anas bin Malik:
The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "None of you should wish for death because of a calamity befalling him; but if he has to wish for death, he should say: "O Allah! Keep me alive as long as life is better for me, and let me die if death is better for me.' "
حَدَّثَنَا آدَمُ، حَدَّثَنَا شُعْبَةُ، حَدَّثَنَا ثَابِتٌ الْبُنَانِيُّ، عَنْ أَنَسِ بْنِ مَالِكٍ ـ رضى الله عنه ـ قَالَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم " لاَ يَتَمَنَّيَنَّ أَحَدُكُمُ الْمَوْتَ مِنْ ضُرٍّ أَصَابَهُ، فَإِنْ كَانَ لاَ بُدَّ فَاعِلاً فَلْيَقُلِ اللَّهُمَّ أَحْيِنِي مَا كَانَتِ الْحَيَاةُ خَيْرًا لِي، وَتَوَفَّنِي إِذَا كَانَتِ الْوَفَاةُ خَيْرًا لِي ".
Sahih Bukhari , hadith no 5671
Souls know their way back home
1- There is not even a single strong hadith that specifies the number of Houris
2- When the Qur’an talked about them, speech is in the feminine form , and actually, some books, such as Fath al-Bari in commentary on Sahih al-Bukhari , and Al-Bahr al-Muhit in interpretation of the Noble Qur’an , present a second opinion : the Houris are actually the believer women themselves, God recreates them as virgins and pretty .
Souls know their way back home
I'm back. So I haven't died. Just putting it out there.
As it is in Catholicism/Christianity. I can only say that I've been there myself and as I was about to jump in a carefully calculated angle to ensure I broke my neck and thus died most efficiently it hit me.
My enemies, my rivals, the people who hate me the most (demons most definitely included), etc. They all want me to kill myself. If I do this (my own neurons firing just in time to keep me from going through with it) I'll be giving the most evil and hated enemies of mine exactly what they want!!!!
Yeah no. Not doing my most hated and most reprehensible of my adversaries what they want. Living out of spite towards literal demons isn't a bad end goal for one's existence. Christ (and all the saints before and hence) did exactly that. I'd rather follow in the path of saints and saviors. Let the Great Enemy commit suicide. I'll live on if only to spite them!
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30
It may be illegal to commit a suicide
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_legislation
I wonder if they could face a capital punishment.
In North Korea it may result in a concentration camp for the whole family, though.
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Sincerely yours,
idiosyncratic type
Life is a joke but do you have a life?
Joinif you dare https://matrix.to/#/#The16Types:matrix.org
Watch Eckhart Tolle's videos. That helped me a lot go through pain in the past.
Flirt with ideas
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Was having a bad struggle with limerence and PTSD, but I'm working on it in therapy, and by focusing on my goals, and my own self improvement and self care. Also, chatgpt sure is one hell of an assistant. Might even be willing to call it an AI therapist. But not quite. It's not quite at the level where it would replace a human psychologist or therapist, but in some ways its more useful, in that it is always available, and free, and has enormous amounts of data, and is non-judgemental, and causes you to judge yourself when you think you've fooled the AI, although I suspect that's only with some socionics types, and people who don't have certain personality constructs like Machiavellianism. I've also decided school is not for me, at least not 4 year school. I'm going to trade school for 2 semesters, and then going straight to work. I've literally done only 1 class in 2 and half years after I got my associate's degree and tried to transfer from community college to a 4 year program. And that 1 class was also at a community college/junior college. I'm going to study something in the tech industry. Make a ton of money. Live a little (without haram). Then worry about women once I get my shit together. EDIT: Another help was the istikhara prayer. EDIT: Oh, that, and I got really religious. Based on the lunar calendar, and based on where you live, it's already eid ul fitr, which means ramadan is over. (The official day of eid starts on the 4th prayer of the day, at dusk, before the day of eid, on the last day of ramadan, so days start at dusk)
Glad to hear you are talking with a therapist. Have you considered medication for the depression? I personally take 20mg citalopram daily and it has been a big help.
It is good to hear you are relying on your faith.
As for school, I have a four year degree but it hasn't made me much money. You probably will be better off learning a trade that is in demand.
Don't forget to ground yourself. Walking in nature, even barefoot, is said to help with grounding.
I am not sure if you are familiar with Rumi and his poetry, but he was of the Sufi mystic tradition of Islam and is much beloved worldwide.
"All nations will place their hope in him."
(Mt 12:21)
You wanting die is a lie in that people aren’t static in feelings.. So right now, you wish to die… In the last, you have at some point wished to live, and once you realize this bias and separate present mishaps and assuage pain, you will go on to live future times where you wish to live, even if you wave back into times you want die…
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
16T doesn’t let me edit (it acts up sometimes and does of this).. Last is intended be past..
Your pain is valid and seen.. But this doesn’t make you wanting die a fixed mean… You will have gone on in this very day I speak, and the day you had even of this written, having moments in living where you wanted live. Even if not conscious, you’re fed yourself and drank water that very day… Self-preserving of life actions. What I believe and what would be true, is that at times, your conscious wishes die as a coping mechanism to avoid pain that you cannot yet ameliorate, lacking perspective, place and what needs (be it skills, relations, or comforting actions or places) to sever that need.. As you’ve developed this outlook from having needs unmet in some fashion— pain relief being one, but that’s symptomatic of what causes pain in of first places.
These things will come at their own time, but it’s a matter of patience. They may not lend as fast as you would imagine. This takes inner work paired with action that comes from inner understanding to more accurately meet this need..
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
An idea I just thought of, would be to make characters out of your emotions and their time frame, as different people, maybe having dialogue, making some story of it.. As I feel this idea I just thought of, would make aware of more bias and give simultaneous catharsis..
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
Or rather, that day* you wrote that, and likely many moments in time since, you had wanted die… But you don’t “wanna die”. You want die in moments, and there are many times this recent at least unconsciously, and definitely throughout other tines in life prior trauma, you wanted life and have preserved self to do so.
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
“Wanting die” would be someone who has their entire life— as a static outlook wanted death. This is no human. No one wants die, a body is programmed to live, as is its mind. There are moments people take that result in their own death, this doesn’t mean they wanted die, they gave into the illusion time would wash away, as much as time itself is illusory..
I cannot promise any betterment in your life at this time, but what you can be sure of is life, coming in waves as it orbits and repeats, will always give you good times as well.. These are worth loving for, for your own soul evolution. You cannot say they aren’t worth it, when you’ve not yet felt and been in this future.. You can pull the future now into the present and life as if it has come, intrapsychically. You don’t have to live interpersonally if that into much, just withdraw away then, as much as allows from your own environment..
Only when needs from an environment aren’t met, does death exceed the consecutive moments one can be in a phase.. Needs can be met if ways find will, which is hard, as I have quite a poor volition and exertion of force.. And live in my own intra self… But there are ways and sometimes things come without action, if one aligns inward enough to where they can catch when it falls in..
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
CH-EII-1Ne | 4(w5)96 sx/so | ELVF | INFP
Please help my baby dragons grow by clicking on each one!
I mean, what I said more has do with time frames.. Even a person who both wants live and die would still only have those warnings of death at some points in time. I agree death shouldn’t be feared upon, and even death should be seen as a spiritual thing, as it was meant happen for every human, but the thing is that when someone dies prior to their own time that would happen by natural cause, it is a bad thing and this type of death should be avoided.
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
16T still hours later has not resolved its phase of being unable edit.. Warnings should be wantings.. (autocorrect changes words that don’t exist in plural form).. I know you recently have written about your own SI (suicidal ideation).. This forum, or at least I assume that’s what you’d meant, I don’t remember the exact post, other than the therapist and the SI.. Maybe it can also mean self-injury, but that’s less likely..
I know this would affect your outlook as of now. I’m not saying this outlook is invalid or that the feeling is any less real, but you need imagine if you’d want die if your needs were met in your life now and in the past when this coping mechanism to handle pain, the brain wiring which affected chemical secretion, began of… I know, it is easier said than of done.. And think about your own time, what it means, in a way beyond yourself and the natural law and will.
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
Since needs can meet and good times in life as how one has dreamed before or now are guaranteed to come (not all dreams, but at least some of what is wanted) if a person survives that is, to a time of a future, it is worth willfully living for those. If your time comes by natural cause before then, this is okay.. It is neither good nor is it bad, unless you had unresolved means..
Life is a cycle of good and bad and neutral.. Good times coming only in waves makes these more meaningful and looking forward to.. Bad things shape one to evolve into a deeper person and have the illusion of bad if one actually evolves and gains the lesson instilled this in.. And the neutral is the bearing in between the tidal extremes that just keep moving about the orbit.. Everything has its own place, one just needs realize this place relative to their own intra life and to gain what each time gives into..
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
What does your suicidal ideation tell you beyond its own voice? What does it imply in a life lesson… And what does it say about unmet needs now?.. What does it say of your own inner limits, real and perceived, as if one keeps living, their unconscious at least can keep going on, just the conscious can’t.. Which is an issue, given the conscious occupies the everyday dwellings, it isn’t the fuel, but it’s the steering wheel..
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
And if someone wants both live and die, this would have its own implications of meaning, as well. This is even more likely to be a coping mechanism.. A “I can’t carry more, so I have this wishing of death as the table to set it down on.. When things are too heavy to carry, and I can go out living now that I’ve set down some weight and if more comes to myself, I can put it there and hold what needs, even maybe means to kill my own self in that baggage, on the side”.. type of thing..
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
I mean that’s how I see most SI as especially if they seek help
anyways don’t want to comment further on misfit’s thread about this.
CH-EII-1Ne | 4(w5)96 sx/so | ELVF | INFP
Please help my baby dragons grow by clicking on each one!
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
The reason I said that someone doesn’t truly want die unless it is static, is because people aren’t the same in their emotions, views, or even the manifestation of inherent traits (which are fixed, how they can potentially manifest is not).. A current self that is living, relative to emotion feeling, outwards stressors affecting the inherent manifestation of these traits.. And current view, relative to things going on in their life, that have shaped their inherent traits a certain way, elicited emotions, and thus informed a view.. It is a rotating lens that has its own phase.. It is just one view.. It isn’t permanent, and it is only a moment. It would only be accurate to say one wants die in a moment or a phase.. And yes, you can both want live and die.. Especially if you were conflicted about afterlife or you had other motivators to remain, such as loved one impact or a deep unconscious knowing in future..
I am not here to say the moments one feels suicidal are invalid, or not deserving of any compassion— sympathy and consoling.. This needs give, if this is what needs to begin with, as a cause of being suicidal, and this would even regulate serotonin itself.. I am here to say it is invalid to say someone “wants die” as a firm belief. That belief isn’t fixed.
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
I know when the clouds obscure the view and sit in that time frame over the emotional lands of one’s inner world and pour down and wet the person, it is a miserable feeling and it may seem forever.. But whilst weather comes about annually in some places, moving to a new location where this isn’t would better this.
For the record, I am not put off by melancholy at all, I just am making figurative metaphors to illustrate.. As this is how I operate..
And I know, that this site will have many who are plagued with suicidal downpours and I have them myself at times.. Reflection in my view is the key.. I don’t want anyone to feel rather feelings are invalid. Feelings are never invalid.. Only when they are acted upon in ways untrue to one’s sum, and of natural laws and the divine, do they become invalid.. No one can ever say how one feels is invalid, unless that emotion leads to an invalid, delusional outlook (not talking about suicide for this). The outlook would be invalid, but one would need tune in emotionally to realize the bias that came from not being aware of the feeling in what it means.
Last edited by Braingel; 04-28-2024 at 08:12 PM.
I am in my head; not society.
Yes, that is who I am, hence the bold am. Also, a brain angel. (+ my own incarnation of a Zelda concept).
My thoughts align w action to succeed what needs (at least in my dreamed ideal, they do)…
Dragons:
Babies, click them to make them grow up into Kara’s Dragon Museum
My favorite adult Museum Exhibits
It is here in Christianity as well. I can only recommend what kept me from taking my own life many years ago and still drives me to live on no matter what despair I encounter.
Live out of spite. Live to defy the great enemy and his sad sorry servants their victory. Live so that you may see the glory God/Allah has promised those who hold to and believe in him during the darkest of nights. Live because he wants you to live on so that you may see the glory of his plan and the vital role you played in it when you refused to give into despair when everyone else thought you would!
You're not Christian but I do recommend you look up a guy called Chad Ripperger. He's a Catholic Exorcist and regularly deals with demons. He tells everyone to never hate themselves because that's what the demons do perfectly. Their fall was and is a perfect act of self-loathing. As will our own be if we do indeed damn ourselves. Hating yourself is thus the first step towards becoming like them and joining them in Hell.
Don't be like the Demons folks. Hell is a thing so terrible you ought never wish it upon even your worst and most hated enemy. If you can Grok that concept you're likely well on your way to heaven even if you won't confess that Jesus is the Christ.
@End, when I read you I hear Bishop Fulton Sheen's voice in my head ! I have to say that I admire your writing style, it's quite remarquable.
EIE
(I suspect that he was as close as one can be to a "pure type")
I've actually read the book of matthew in the new testament, but I still have my problems with christianity and the resurrection of jesus, which I won't get into because I'm not qualified to proselytize, and I don't want to start a flame war. All I can say is I'm perfectly content being a Sunni Muslim of no particular orientation. (No I'm not a gulenist anymore) EDIT: Then again, it might be that almost all the people I know are Muslim, and I was afraid of persecution, especially my mom's nagging and constantly checking "did you pray your salah" because I did consider becoming a christian on some occasions but my mom emotionally blackmailed, manipulated, and forced me back into islam. EDIT: One of the main problems I have is that there was an earthquake around the time jesus was in the tomb, so couldnt his body have been sunken into a rock or the soil, and islamically speaking, it was the imposter jesus, and the real jesus appeared to the apostles? That is, if the bible is still intact. EDIT: Also, I'm broke and live with my mom. I'm waiting to finish my certifications and get a job and move out.
Last edited by Misfit; 05-13-2024 at 01:27 AM.
It doesn't matter, and no one here really cares. You will be forgotten, here and elsewhere. Even if you were to kill yourself right this moment, all you would be doing is displacing the pain you feel to someone else. Is this something you want to happen? But beyond that, and regardless of what you want or think, the side effects from your passing will also fade very quickly. And you're going nowhere and no further than the closest cemetery. Once you realize how unimportant you are in the grand scheme of things, and how short your life is compared to the life of the universe, you may no longer find death attractive. No more attractive than life at least.