Quote Originally Posted by discojoe
Yeah, that's it. It is essentially backstabbing. It is indecent, cowardly, pathetic, horribly unattractive, and borderline evil. I absolutely do not tolerate the way these girls go about their relationships.

With guys it is not quite as bad. While I am against violence as a means, at least it is usually more upfront and direct. True, a lot of guys will pick on others when they're with a gang of their friends, and some guys will pick a fight without the other knowing that he's concealing a knife or gun. These things are dispicable, and just as bad as the female equivalent. But with guys there's less subterfuge most of the time.
You know what, though? I know plenty of conning, manipulating men, too.

Disco, perhaps what you want and need in your life are open, direct and straightforward people of both genders and especially female. I'd focus more on what you want than what you don't want. You already know what you don't want, so be glad you've learned that, and let go of the resentments about it. NOW go find someone you DO want! :-)

And I also know many men who use tactics with their s/o's to try to "keep them in line." As a matter of fact, all men seem to do this at least a little. They're socialized that way; to be large and in charge. When I hear women complain about how they are victimized by their men, I try to help them to see that they don't have to allow tactics to control them and their decision-making.

It's gender politics. Takes awhile to get the hang of.