IEI - SLE Duality discussion and stories (INFp-ESTp)

[Brilliand]

Circumstances are getting in the way of what you know would be a good thing. Can you change the circumstances?

[ESTP]

Circumstances are getting in the way of what you know would be a good thing. Can you change the circumstances?

Circumstances being that he's leaving the country to go for school for a year ..max two. So, it would be long distance, and he doesn't want that. He also is considering not working in the country of origin...and he thinks that I'm rooted here and wouldnt be willing to "move" i guess you can say.

The case being, that he tried long distance before and it didn't work. However, I know how I feel and the fact of the matter is, I would uproot for him. I would adapt to the circumstances because he is worth it.

He accredits his decisions as "not wanting to disappoint me" due to the fact that his past relaionships that were long distance didn't work.

He also said, that this decision isn't a question of love or a question of not feeling anything. He basically said he feels things for me, but right now he cannot commit. So, that's why I want to just back off and let him do his thing. His life is crazy, and he's all over the place, quite frankly I'm the same, but willing to give it a go, because I don't see how things would be any different from now with the exception of saying "it's just you". He went on to say that, right now he cannot commit but he wants something down the road. Whatever that road is...or whenever it is...I think it's the things you overcome and how you handle the obstacles that makes a relationship work. If it wasn't hard work, it wouldn't be worth it.

I don't know how to articulate that to him, and find that he's making decisions for me in a sense that he is trying to protect me from something I don't want to be protected from.

At the end of the day, I don't know what to do...because I still feel the same but don't want to force a relationship on him, and want to let him do his thing.

[Satan]

Circumstances being that he's leaving the country to go for school for a year ..max two. So, it would be long distance, and he doesn't want that. He also is considering not working in the country of origin...and he thinks that I'm rooted here and wouldnt be willing to "move" i guess you can say.

The case being, that he tried long distance before and it didn't work. However, I know how I feel and the fact of the matter is, I would uproot for him. I would adapt to the circumstances because he is worth it.

He accredits his decisions as "not wanting to disappoint me" due to the fact that his past relaionships that were long distance didn't work.

He also said, that this decision isn't a question of love or a question of not feeling anything. He basically said he feels things for me, but right now he cannot commit. So, that's why I want to just back off and let him do his thing. His life is crazy, and he's all over the place, quite frankly I'm the same, but willing to give it a go, because I don't see how things would be any different from now with the exception of saying "it's just you". He went on to say that, right now he cannot commit but he wants something down the road. Whatever that road is...or whenever it is...I think it's the things you overcome and how you handle the obstacles that makes a relationship work. If it wasn't hard work, it wouldn't be worth it.

I don't know how to articulate that to him, and find that he's making decisions for me in a sense that he is trying to protect me from something I don't want to be protected from.

At the end of the day, I don't know what to do...because I still feel the same but don't want to force a relationship on him, and want to let him do his thing.

the onus is on him to open you up.

[Satan]

Circumstances being that he's leaving the country to go for school for a year ..max two. So, it would be long distance, and he doesn't want that. He also is considering not working in the country of origin...and he thinks that I'm rooted here and wouldnt be willing to "move" i guess you can say.

The case being, that he tried long distance before and it didn't work. However, I know how I feel and the fact of the matter is, I would uproot for him. I would adapt to the circumstances because he is worth it.

He accredits his decisions as "not wanting to disappoint me" due to the fact that his past relaionships that were long distance didn't work.

He also said, that this decision isn't a question of love or a question of not feeling anything. He basically said he feels things for me, but right now he cannot commit. So, that's why I want to just back off and let him do his thing. His life is crazy, and he's all over the place, quite frankly I'm the same, but willing to give it a go, because I don't see how things would be any different from now with the exception of saying "it's just you". He went on to say that, right now he cannot commit but he wants something down the road. Whatever that road is...or whenever it is...I think it's the things you overcome and how you handle the obstacles that makes a relationship work. If it wasn't hard work, it wouldn't be worth it.

I don't know how to articulate that to him, and find that he's making decisions for me in a sense that he is trying to protect me from something I don't want to be protected from.

At the end of the day, I don't know what to do...because I still feel the same but don't want to force a relationship on him, and want to let him do his thing.

Maybe you should just say that you don't need protecting. And that you just want to give things a go for the time that he's around. You may die tommorow. And circumstances always change. There's always going to be something coming, something changing, but that doesn't mean you should put your relationships on hold. And it'll make it easier to reconnect when he gets back, if that's what you both want at the time.