Specifically a female




I was working with a person yesterday who I am fairly sure was INFp, and I have some questions:

  • How do INFps prefer to contribute in a group setting?
    The only other type seemed INFj, but she struck me as more a victim - she responded well to assertiveness and direction.
    But when I asked her if she thought something looked right, or was a good idea, she looked at me as if she didn't want to say anything - she didn't want to take blame or responsibility for making a semi-important decision. (A)

    NOTE: In no way am I trying to make this person sound bad, I just want to know how to better work with an INFp, as she was the person I was most unsure about during the event.


(A) - I am reminded of this:
Quote Originally Posted by tcaudilllg
Quote Originally Posted by UDP III
Quote Originally Posted by tcaudilllg
PoLR hits are worst when they come from personal knowledge, as opposed to base. I.E., I'm watchful of ESTp opinion, but what really tears me up is an ISTp attack.
Do you think that has anything to do with your newfound INTj-ENFj status?
...I didn't think it would. My view on the PoLR hit was, ISTp uses as personal knowledge, their function of aggression. That's used to wound. ESTp doesn't use to hurt people, but to help them. ESTp hits INTj unintentionally; ISTp focuses their attack for maximum damage....

Let's look at it from the INTj point of view. We use personal knowledge, so who has the most to fear from our attacks? INFp and ISFp. I've caused some damage to INFps before by attacking their relationship choices...I didn't mean to, it was more of a self-defense thing. It's not easy to notice the damage of course; it's a very deep wound and the wounded try to keep it to themselves....
We were setting up a display, and I probably appeared to take charge of the situation, as everyone was standing around, and it would be a waste of 2 people were doing something and 4 were not. So I began helping other people get started. Later on, when her and I were sort of on our own working on one part of the display, we (or really I) were re-arranging things, one part of a display, and when I asked the INFp for her opinion, she looked like a deer in the headlights. Not that I was seeking her opinion greatly - I was too close to the display to see if everything looked right, so I asked her what she thought.

(This may also have something to do with her not being certain about what to do at the moment or who to pay attention to, as the head of the organization was talking about other things, gossipy stuff. But to me know one was doing anything... so I started re-arranging, and then sought her opinion)
(In retrospect, I may have been looking for an ESFj clear-cut "emotionally expressive response", so I probably asked her a few times, because she wasn't giving me a very useful response. Hopefully it did not come across as threatening - to me I was just looking for an answer)


Could this be what Tcau was referring to? Did it seem like I was questioning her relationship choices (as in, how to arrange things)?
I could see that being so, as things weren't organized as well as they could be, and furthermore, there was other parts of the display that were not up yet, so there were other things I knew about that she may not have known at the time.


There was an outside chance she was not INFp, but she certainly came across as INF, or at least IF. Can you relate at all?
At the end of the event it seemed like everything was fine, but I wanted to ask here to see if the INFp community has advice for how to best work with someone of your type - tips, suggestions, etc.