Although to be fair every single photo of me when young I seem to be clearly mischievous/happy and there’s no disconnect. My dad said I also had a careful temperament tho so maybe both then

and some point k become reserved and my mom said I suddenly withdrew and became very sad after starting school and they don’t know why. I don’t remember any trauma tied to something like this personally

all I know as far as I remember I have in fact avoidant attachment with my parents
anxious attachment with romantic interests

ie disorganized attachment overall. The most messed up one apparently