1. What is beauty? What is love?

For me, beauty is something that evokes a feeling. For example, I'm really into vintage aesthetics cause they transport me to that decade. True beauty makes me feel at peace and takes my fear away. It can also be simply a color palette that reminds me of something that I like, or looking at an art piece that is just simply inspired or unique and I become absolutely obsessed with it. Beautiful things send a message, sometimes even more than words can. Some parts of beauty are objective, like the color wheel and I'm fond of color seasons, but others are more subjective like animation styles and favorite fashion pieces. While beauty is lovely, you can even have a soft spot for ugly things, like an ugly doll, an "uglier" cat breed or an ugly piece of furniture.

To me, love is reliability. Who do you go to when you're sad? Who can you count on for a laugh? Who can I simply trust? It's also knowing the person inside and out, their passions and interests and quirks. It means that we can have fun together, and that our walls are down when we are with each other. Relaxed, casual, but also meaningful and memorable. It means honoring each other's individuality and merging with them at the same time. Using creativity to appeal to each other, to give the best gifts. Intimacy, respect, watching each other grow, just being another's person.

2. What are your most important values?
I place a lot of value of doing things that knowing else has thought of, being resourceful and looking for alternatives to everyday life. I value being thoughtful and putting effort into what I do and having depth/not being superficial. I love animals, so of course I value being good to them, whether scaly or furry(my favorites are scaly, though). I value being able to compromise in arguments, open mindedness, being polite/not a sleazeball. Freedom. Self expression. Self awareness and being able to grow and develop new skills. Being open minded to new cultures, unless there's something I can't respect. Finding a way to bring my passions to the real world, like finding the right job to do so.

3. Do you have any sort of spiritual/religious beliefs, and why do you hold (or don't) those beliefs in the first place?
It's tough, I've dabbled in many religions. I was Christian for a while, but got a lot of intrusive thoughts due to it (worrying everything is a sin). I've also dabbled in Wicca, and the idea of Summerland is fascinating and having my divine objects but it's hard to focus on one thing for that long. I've gone to mystic fairs and it was one of the best feelings in my life as there's something beautiful about all the gems having these different properties. I have been attracted to Unitarian Universalism cause well, the united feeling of people from all places. I think there is something out there after death, because there's so much thought that goes into the design of the universe, and plus energy can't be destroyed. My mom was a Christian and was homophobic(this is the only time she brought up religion mostly), but when I got older and met my new family they were all different religions so I felt free to explore and it was nice.

4. Opinion on war and militaries? What is power to you?
War sucks, but it's one of those things that just is. I'm fascinated by the military when it comes from a history standpoint(WW2 is especially fascinating to me and the 1000 day war thanks to Encanto), and I even love RTS games since I can strategize and form my army from a different culture. I'm also interested in military anime like FMA and Attack on Titan and seeing how society is affected by it. From a more realistic standpoint though, military is just a necessary evil. The army is something I've dreaded joining and have never been interested in except maybe the Airforce. We say, "Thank you for your service" to veterans(it feels so forced though and I wouldn't want that said to me), yet we don't give them housing.

For me, power is something that I feel like I don't have a lot of the time due to my withdrawnness and indirectness. It's something I don't desire when it comes to groups, but I want a sense of power from within to get what I want done. I do get a lot of big ideas, and that provides me power until they get shot down. Power can go to a lot of people's heads, unless given to the right person, as some people stay passive even when granted the power.
5. What have you had long conversations about? What are your interests? Why?

I've had long conversations about many things really. Typology and how it applies to my favorite shows and my pets, languages, the beauty of the seasons and how weather changes, my favorite animals, favorite characters, how things change from humans to what's changed in the past decade. My interests include decadeology(comparing and contrasting different decades), trying new foods from other countries, traveling, reptiles, history of everyday things, animation, making odd collages(either online or with random materials I find), and really just anything obscure. I also love thrifting/going to flea markets to find said obscure things, and online shopping to get freebies and also old stuff like I bought myself a VideoNow on Etsy.
6. Interested in health/medicine as a conversation topic? Are you focused on your body?
Sometimes, I have some nerdy fixations like a show I like called Mystery Diagnosis where you see people go through hell to get diagnosed with something and it ends up being a really rare disease. As a foodie, I'm interested in nutrition as well and find it fascinating all the different properties a certain food has. I'm focused on my body in that if I notice a change, I'm worried I'm developing some sorta illness even though I'm still fairly young. Idk why I'm like this, maybe I want to be on a medical show. I like the idea of having routines for my health, but I can't keep them up that long though I admire people who do and like watching their content(like skincare is interesting then I can't follow it).

7. What do you think of daily chores?
I don't mind chores too much, but I am a big multitasker when it comes to chores. I'll do dishes while watching YouTube and talking with friends and so forth. It gives me something to do I suppose. If I do my laundry, I get more outfits. I don't care for vacuuming though, I don't like lugging that vacuum out. Also, my pets would die without said chores. I remember as a kid, I didn't dislike chores as a kid per se but I remember I'd get a chore list and I asked if I could pick my own since I liked certain chores more than others and I wanted to cook for my family since I had a Food Network phase. I remember cleaning my room was a pain too, and my mom would assign me to a certain portion of the room when I wanted to start in a different place so I could find toys I hadn't seen in a bit.
8. Books or films you liked? Recently read/watched or otherwise. Examples welcome.

Recently, I've gotten into audible, so I've done more reading or listening, whatever you wanna call it. I'm enjoying Understood Betsy-it's from 1916 and I like reading books from that period since I actually feel immersed in it rather than just reading historical fiction(I mean, I like that as well but this feels the most genuine). Lately, I've been into YouTube documentaries more than actual shows since I like learning about the most obscure info possible(last night I watched a documentary about Emergency Broadcast sounds). I have been on a Fullmetal Alchemist kick though and plan to get into even more dark/sad anime. I'm also a fan of Steven Universe, Winx, House and Cold Case. Sometimes I go on kicks where I like 80s shows, since I like that even though they're seen as corny there's often a hidden darkness to them because of the social messages(those shows were used to keep kids inside).

9. What have people seen as your weaknesses? What do you dislike about yourself?
People often describe me as unassertive, indecisive, and indirect, sometimes even flaky. They aren't wrong I gotta say. I expect people to know things without me saying it, and it's like why am I like this? I'm also not very good at actualizing my dreams since the technical parts can be confusing like paperwork, and often the idea of things is better than the actualization. I'm not very good with conflict and being firm with others and even myself(forcing myself to do things/cut things off). I'm very quiet in person, even though I'm buzzing internally so it feels like my internal self doesn't match my outer self. Why am I so low energy and high energy at the same time??
10. What have people seen as your strengths? What do you like about yourself?
Other people see me as open minded, kind, chill, and compliment me often on my love of food and art and just overall creativity. I like these things about me too, and that I have a good aesthetic sense/good taste in fashion and film. I love my insatiable curiosity about random things, and that even though I'm a passive person I'm active in areas I'm passionate about. I also have a good sense of humor, even though it can be cringe at times but I have a good dark sense of humor. I often think about what is forgotten, the underdogs, what is underrated in life and want to take the unexplored path. I'm very resourceful and can make something out of anything.

11. In what areas of your life would you like help?
I'd like help being more decisive since being indecisive gets in the way of my goals. I'd like to get out of my head more and just, live. I'd like to be better at just adulting in general, and speaking up more. I'd like to be better at mechanical things(both in the literal sense and being able to fill out forms better). I need to make things happen more rather than letting them come to me. While I value open mindedness/fluidity greatly, sometimes I wish I was more solid in my thinking. I just want more self-confidence, really, so I can live my existence and explore life to the fullest.

12. What qualities do you most like and dislike in other people? What types do you get along with?
I like people who are grounded, but not too grounded that they can't handle my whimsical thinking. I like people who aren't quite like anyone else and are a good mix of casual/deep thinkers. I like people who I can talk about anything with and that have a good sense of humor. I dislike it when people are close minded, steamroll too much and have little wiggle room in their thinking. People who complain too much and have set ways of seeing things. People who are shallow and just have little self-awareness, pervs, animal haters. I do have a soft spot for grumpy people since I enjoy dark humor and getting things off my chest with them.
13. A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward and outward reaction?
Outwardly, I'd challenge them in a more passive way, like provide a different point of view without saying how full of BS they are. Or, I'll bring up something that doesn't specifically advocate that viewpoint but mention something I saw that makes me see their viewpoint but not agree with it in the end. On the inside, I'd be like, why are you like this? Who raised you? Why do you have to be so set in your ways? It'd be hard to just exist around them from now on. I'd try to avoid bringing up that topic to my friend in the future, but advocate for it in my other spheres. If it was too severe, I'd separate from them all together.

14. How do you choose your friends and how do you behave around them?
Since I'm shy my friends choose me more than anything. However, I choose them if they respect me and are open with me, and we have interests in common(although this isn't as hard of a rule as it used to be since it's hard to talk about interests sometimes at work). Working at a grocery store, I've met people from all different backgrounds so I'm willing to be friends with them if they show interest in me from the start. Around my friends, I'm shy but also have a trollish side, self-deprecating and am a good listener. I'm the one who goes along with everything for the most part and am somehow the high energy and low energy one at the same time.

15. How do you behave around strangers?
I'm generally uncomfortable around strangers and don't really know how to react so I wait for them to talk most of the time. I just get nervous going up to people out of the blue. I also just feel left out/inherently different around them. However, as a cashier I meet strangers every day, so I have to be talkative to a point. I try to relate to them by asking what other plans they have after shopping and point out foods that look tasty on the belt, as well as joke around a bit. There are certain customers that make me uncomfortable though, like older men and people who ask me about my age and get touchy with me. Also, when people just straight up ignore what I say, that's annoying.