How do ESIs perceive SLEs and vice versa?
Do you know any successful relations between these types? What do they look like?
What steps would be needed to avoid or mend conflicts and misunderstandings?
ESI-SLE Supervision
How do ESIs perceive SLEs and vice versa?
Do you know any successful relations between these types? What do they look like?
What steps would be needed to avoid or mend conflicts and misunderstandings?
@Bento, I know a female ESI-Se who dated a female SLE-Se for a while. They were both about 21 and exploring relationships. When they were together, being around them was like being in a hothouse for orchids, the Se sexual chemistry just dripped off them.
However, I caught the ESI giving the SLE a disdaining glance as if she were saying, "How can you be so stupid?" I expect their relationship will devolve into distant acquaintances, because the SLE intended to move away.
Supervision can work in a limited kind of way in some cases, particularly if the two people have a lot in common and a lot of shared interests. But ultimately, it has some very serious drawbacks.
ESI are not subtle about their Fi. They will question the living heck out of your morals, they will emotionally manipulate you to come see them "hum? why haven't you come see me? are you mad at me or something?" yeah maybe their Fi supervises everyone lol
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Dual type(as per tcaudilllg)
Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?
I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE
Best description of functions:
http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html
from my perspective as a ESI, SLEs are intimidating and ‘ morally confusing ‘. I feel their presence, it’s quite strong to me. They seem so stoic and serious by themselves, but with friends they’re so cheerful ( I’m the same way ).
I know a SLE guy . He’s physically confrontational, provoking. He liked teasing me back then and would poke fun at one of my interest ( which is ironic because he ended up liking the same thing soon after).
The SLE was relentless in his teasing like his ILE brother. I noticed from my experiences with fi polrs that keeping distance from them or cutting communication with them for a while after they did something wrong makes them realize how much of an ass they were, and they leave you alone for a while.
When the SLE teased me, instead of looking at him angrily or defending myself, I ignored him and stayed quiet. I don’t remember how long I did this but it was for a couple of weeks/months(?). That made him reluctant to talk to me as freely as he used to and was more nicer. He was more careful with what he said and I could tell he felt like he had to tip toe around me.
It’s hard for me to understand fi polrs and I’m sure it’s hard for them to understand fi bases. He sees me as judgy, closed off/not communicative.
My experiences with SLEs have been rocky but I don’t dislike them. I do believe we can get along if both of us put effort like any other relationship.
I think the ESI needs to realize they don’t need to take things so personally. The SLE also needs to be mindful to how they can come off as insensitive or especially confrontational.
It depends on subtype too, he’s a SLE-Se and I’m a ESI-Fi. SE subtypes are more unpredictable and intimidating to me, too much SE stresses me out!!
Last edited by virtualization; 05-28-2024 at 09:44 PM.
YES ! Exactly! Finally! Someone understands me! I Have been on the internet yelling this for what feels like ages. With Fi PoLR if they are pissing you off, act like they don't exist. This is exactly what's worked with Me (EII) and my friend ILE, supervision relations. They will not try to break your silence, it is literally a trump card. I only learned it by total accident becaue I got so exhausted of my ILE friend that I decided not to hang out with him for a week and viola! On his best behavior when we decided to hang out again. It's temporary though.Originally Posted by virtualization
With silent treatments though I'd wager the SLE would just judge you as being passive aggressive and difficult, furthering their confusion as they don't understand in the first place that something was done wrong.
Silent treatments are hella passive aggressive. Not to be confused with "saying nothing if you have nothing good to say".
I think the trouble gets going when Fi seeks to "sort things out", or "sort out the relationship". For Fi polr, this feels to "on the nose"
Sounds a lot like me, I have a ESI friend who continued to ignore me when I called him white-washed Sasuke and told him he looked like a human paint brushed when he tried to cosplay Kakashi for the first time. Looking back at it, he actually laughs at it, now that he has stated that now he actually considers me a friend.
Sounds scary, better to tell them directly.The SLE was relentless in his teasing like his ILE brother. I noticed from my experiences with fi polrs that keeping distance from them or cutting communication with them for a while after they did something wrong makes them realize how much of an ass they were, and they leave you alone for a while.
When the SLE teased me, instead of looking at him angrily or defending myself, I ignored him and stayed quiet. I don’t remember how long I did this but it was for a couple of weeks/months(?). That made him reluctant to talk to me as freely as he used to and was more nicer. He was more careful with what he said and I could tell he felt like he had to tip toe around me.
Fi summarized: Tone of Voice, Mutual Influence, Respect (in terms of kindness), Conscience, Honor, Dignity, Love, Desire, Hatred, Dislike, Attraction or Repulsion, Relationships.It’s hard for me to understand fi polrs and I’m sure it’s hard for them to understand fi bases. He sees me as judgy, closed off/not communicative.
My experiences with SLEs have been rocky but I don’t dislike them. I do believe we can get along if both of us put effort like any other relationship.
A lot of this boils down to 1D Fi being extremely weak and experienced based. Usually depending on others for help, clueless in some cases, and not really normative in most cases regarding Fi. That a SLE would rather than change around a certain individual after undergoing some experience that finally got the message through their heads.
Similarly, while having to tip toe around Fi base users, weak Fi still indicates difficulty in changing one's attitude towards other people in the majority of cases.
Even more so, SLE is -Fi than +Fi, keeping themselves at a distance than to cause flair ups(-Fe, the dwelling of negative emotions, preferring +Fe to focus on the positives). Fi being mental in both SLE and ESIs case makes it where they both consciously aware of it, and the ESI is not afraid to pick out the mistakes bad by the SLE's weak Fi(which they know they are bad at).
The SLE may not get the hint of what his audience is, make jokes that repulse them, not keeping in mind what his audience would actually prefer to hear depending on their own personal like and dislikes and sensitivity levels.
More or so, as aushura has stated,"This is the so-called place of least resistance (PoLR) of the human psyche, the main source of all conflicts, hurt feelings and misunderstandings."
The relentless teasing coming from the SLE part is just sloppy use of Fe, Fe mobilizing, picking fun at others to seek a reaction and joke around. Not necessarily trying to inflict any negativity in others.I think the ESI needs to realize they don’t need to take things so personally. The SLE also needs to be mindful to how they can come off as insensitive or especially confrontational.
It depends on subtype too, he’s a SLE-Se and I’m a ESI-Fi. SE subtypes are more unpredictable and intimidating to me, too much SE stresses me out!!
End of the day, if we focus on gaining the experience to balance out our lower-dimensional functions, we run into less trouble and the easier we can understand others.
Last edited by Muira; 06-02-2024 at 10:28 PM.
Library because this site has become sort of an idiocracy
Honestly I think they get a bad rep. I think they understand people better than most, why they act in certain ways, their thought processes but I wouldn't expect to be empathized with if at all. Then again that's with everyone so no discrimination here. A friend of mine likes to poke fun and try to rouse me up, most of the time I'm serious so we don't click as much as we should. But she's okay, I see myself in her a little. I think they have a little bit of a blind faith with certain people in their lives... And it's like, that person doesn't like you and here's their motivation for xyz. It kind of scares them if you say that or they won't take it as serious as you would.
It's a pretty neutral, stale relationship we often don't trust each other but we manage to keep peace and do whatever we have to in the same vicinity. I don't care about my type but that's my opinion from experience. If we take into the account this theory holds true in reality, then yeah, cordial relationship only.
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