Therapy

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

oh I feel like I've already talked about this to death- but yeah I haven't had a good experience with most therapy. Besides the LSI therapist I gush about, most therapists have been Delta and really clash-y. Many of them blamed me for things that weren't even my fault, were jerk-ish and asshole ish. Didn't have any true empathy and compassion. One particulary evil one would even totally make up sexual abuses that didn't happen just so she could report the person to the police and have them arrested. None of it was true she was just being a cunt.

I felt better and healed only by being therapied by Betas I think. The best therapist advice I think I got was 'you don't need to be here. Just go out and explore- do what you want to do etc.' The best therapist gave me confidence- but 90% of it took it away. I was already vulnerable and 'low' and they just made it even worse. Or even if they were nice and not harmful and well-intentioned I still didn't respond to it that well usually. I'm not trying to say that all therapy is evil or bad for everybody ((but I still think many/most of it kinda is...))

oh maybe it also has something to do with my type 5 to 8 integration. Therapy is sorta like the opposite of type 8-ish and ironically I've felt healed more by 8 crap. Like the LSI gave me a lot of official responsibilities and I made it to the highest level of the group home lol (sorta like me becoming a moderator here I guess...) It's like I grow by getting power, not by talking about my feelings. I guess that's fucked up but it works for me.

[Aster]

oh I feel like I've already talked about this to death- but yeah I haven't had a good experience with most therapy. Besides the LSI therapist I gush about, most therapists have been Delta and really clash-y. Many of them blamed me for things that weren't even my fault, were jerk-ish and asshole ish. Didn't have any true empathy and compassion. One particulary evil one would even totally make up sexual abuses that didn't happen just so she could report the person to the police and have them arrested. None of it was true she was just being a cunt.

I felt better and healed only by being therapied by Betas I think. The best therapist advice I think I got was 'you don't need to be here. Just go out and explore- do what you want to do etc.' The best therapist gave me confidence- but 90% of it took it away. I was already vulnerable and 'low' and they just made it even worse. Or even if they were nice and not harmful and well-intentioned I still didn't respond to it that well usually. I'm not trying to say that all therapy is evil or bad for everybody ((but I still think many/most of it kinda is...))

oh maybe it also has something to do with my type 5 to 8 integration. Therapy is sorta like the opposite of type 8-ish and ironically I've felt healed more by 8 crap. Like the LSI gave me a lot of official responsibilities and I made it to the highest level of the group home lol (sorta like me becoming a moderator here I guess...) It's like I grow by getting power, not by talking about my feelings. I guess that's fucked up but it works for me.

yeah, going off what you said about therapist reporting things, I feel like that’s one reason I couldn’t entirely benefit from it. I would want to feel like I could tell one anything and not have to worry about that, but the fact of the matter is, you do, especially nowadays, people just report anything. I even googled things not to say or tell a therapist before I went, and what they were legally required to report, to be on the safe side. So yeah, I feel like I filter probably, and it takes away from the experience. Because I mean I wouldn’t even want to go down a road where they would even think I would be sexually abused, so I might word things or direct the convo away from them wanting to even think that.