Mirage relationship, matching subtypes

[myresearch]

I can't even imagine being attracted to LSEs in a romantic or sexual way. However, they can be reliable, trustworthy and supportive as friends.

[The Reality Denialist]

Makes me think what is going on with them and this site shows it is a lot misunderstanding something what was quite clear but less clarified. Seems a lot like blissful ignorance that can be totally fine for a very long time.

I can't even imagine being attracted to LSEs in a romantic or sexual way. However, they can be reliable, trustworthy and supportive as friends.

This mirage vs semi dual thing is reversed between rationals/irrationals.

[myresearch]

Makes me think what is going on with them and this site shows it is a lot misunderstanding something what was quite clear but less clarified. Seems a lot like blissful ignorance that can be totally fine for a very long time.


This mirage vs semi dual thing is reversed between rationals/irrationals.

In my point of view, J functions determines what kind of language that we talk in terms of romance, therefore, how we love/like someone, therefore who we are attracted to. So irrational-mirage being equivalent to rational semiduality always made sense to me, but I always thought that I may think that way because I am rational.

[PinKDiGiT18]

I can't even imagine being attracted to LSEs in a romantic or sexual way. However, they can be reliable, trustworthy and supportive as friends.

See, this is exactly my sentiment with regard to my Mirages (ESE), and why it always blows my mind whenever I see how fondly Adam speaks of his LSI relationships. I almost want to experience that (with an ESE-Si in particular), because there are so many who say our type of Mirage relation (with complementary erotic attitudes) can be very positive

I have found some Mirage women to be objectively beautiful, but never had an attraction to the guys. To be fair, I don't know that many male ESEs. But concerning the ones I know, their high emotionality can be a turn-off for me at times...because I bring enough of it to the table myself.

@Stray Cat, I hope things are still working out!

[myresearch]

See, this is exactly my sentiment with regard to my Mirages (ESE), and why it always blows my mind whenever I see how fondly Adam speaks of his LSI relationships. I almost want to experience that (with an ESE-Si in particular), because there are so many who say our type of Mirage relation (with complementary erotic attitudes) can be very positive

I have found some Mirage women to be objectively beautiful, but never had an attraction to the guys. To be fair, I don't know that many male ESEs. But concerning the ones I know, their high emotionality can be a turn-off for me at times...because I bring enough of it to the table myself.

@Stray Cat, I hope things are still working out!

I am also baffled by Adam and his LSI ex and I am more baffled that his LII sister is married to LSE. I wonder how that even happened As I am informed, it can be due to upbringing.

I find romance styles described by Meged and Ovcharov (IEE-SLI couple) much more precise than erotic style descriptions.

[FreelancePoliceman]

I can't even imagine being attracted to LSEs in a romantic or sexual way. However, they can be reliable, trustworthy and supportive as friends.

Re. dating LSEs, I could see myself doing it if I were much younger and less experienced. I usually like LSEs on a personal level, and Si is sexy, but there’s a certain personal distance I keep from them. I don’t think a marriage would work very well.

I think the main issue is that it feels like they take a domineering and controlling approach to everyone they feel comes under their wing, and it’s a bit much for my taste. I guess EIIs may like being told what to do, but a partner who constantly feels a need to command me in the most inconsequential of situations and genuinely doesn’t see any reason I should ever disagree with these incessant pronouncements does not sound like a good time to me. I really don’t relish the idea of fighting every decision I make. I think for an LII it would be as horrible as dating an SLE, and for similar reasons, just with less initial red flags to scare them off.

I don’t think there are any active LSEs on this forum but I’d be curious to hear their part: what they’d think of dating an LII.

[FreelancePoliceman]

the second last (don’t want to format; on phone) sentence - I don’t like the idea of a dictator-type LSE either lol

i think with us we are capable of receiving LSE’s Te info in a way where we use it as instructed but i don’t want to be micromanaged either. I want someone who can “take charge” as needed and then be receptive and relaxed as needed too.

Lol. It’s a benevolent dictatorship. If you haven’t spent much time around LSEs than you may find you like them better in practice than in theory. They really do tend to mean the best for people and really try to help them out. They can be really wonderful people. They just have a certain way of seeing the world, and if you have a conflicting vision they unknowingly try to steamroll you. If you’re substantively at odds it’s a constant power struggle, and unlike SLEs they don’t even seem to realize it’s a struggle most of the time; they genuinely don’t know how to respond to a challenge and just continue to push for what they want like they’re the walking dead. But it seems like dual couples don’t really impugn or intrude on each other’s sphere of interest too much. These power struggles don’t occur with EII at all from what I’ve seen; EII just feel relieved when LSE give them easy solutions to problems. My grandparents are LSE/EII and despite being some of the most strong-willed people on earth they’ve barely ever quarreled. Another consideration is that EII are bossy in relationships themselves; I see this too in my grandparents’ relationship. They boss each other in different spheres and neither seems to mind. Lol.

You might also perceive LSEs as more laid-back than I’m making them out to be. They are, in a way.

[FreelancePoliceman]

yeah I imagine two logical types can butt heads

(...and I generally still don’t like LSE-Tes from the ones I’ve met; not that I’ve closed myself upto that subtype completely or even totally opened up to the other one. Just everything seems to go wrong from the get go and I see them as a little too squeamish about the unexpected...anyways)

I think I do prefer a generally relaxed and receptive and kind LSE with an undergird of confidence/authority like he can “catch me” if needed but is otherwise pleasantly gentle and receptive to my...intuitiveness lol

Duals aren’t really like that from what I’ve seen unless you’re willing to accept a middle-aged partner; someone who’s much more mature than what I’d guess is likely for your age. It takes a lot of experience in life to appreciate your duals, especially since duals don’t tend to spend much time in each other’s society. LSEs’ Fi-receptivity to EIIs is something that comes naturally to them and has to be developed. The good news, since you seem to want to date an LSE, is that most people develop a need to integrate their weaker valued functions into the ego, so sensitivity to your feelings is something an LSE will feel the urge to develop. You would also hopefully develop appreciation for the LSE’s nature and temperament yourself, since it seems you’re mostly thinking in terms of what an LSE would do for you, and because you don’t seem to appreciate their outlook and temperament too much yourself and want them to be more similar to you.

[necrosebud]

Duals aren’t really like that from what I’ve seen unless you’re willing to accept a middle-aged partner; someone who’s much more mature than what I’d guess is likely for your age. It takes a lot of experience in life to appreciate your duals, especially since duals don’t tend to spend much time in each other’s society. LSEs’ Fi-receptivity to EIIs is something that comes naturally to them and has to be developed. The good news, since you seem to want to date an LSE, is that most people develop a need to integrate their weaker valued functions into the ego, so sensitivity to your feelings is something an LSE will feel the urge to develop. You would also hopefully develop appreciation for the LSE’s nature and temperament yourself, since it seems you’re mostly thinking in terms of what an LSE would do for you, and because you don’t seem to appreciate their outlook and temperament too much yourself and want them to be more similar to you.

idk, I don't think that's true. I don't think there's one true type of LSE and should I not "appreciate them" that I "don't appreciate LSEs"

with anyways I adopt a bit of an Ni mindset, what will be...will be. (That some people simply click and connect for whatever inexplicable reason and some don’t; I don’t want to force that initial connection)

I also disagree "duals cannot really be like that" (pleasant and compatible, essentially).

If I've had part of it with an SLI it really shouldn't be so much of a stretch for behavior in an LSE. I didn't have to learn to appreciate that SLI; I just naturally trusted him like I've never anybody in my life and all he needed to do was be himself. I disagree that this cannot be recreated, even better, in duality.

...anyways, this thread is about mirage so...won't derail further.

I also don't think I want them to be "similar" to me; what I have described here and elsewhere is an opposite, a contrast. With some similarities of course. I would take on their traits as they would mine. Anyways, I think you may have misunderstood what I’ve communicated here and elsewhere as I’m not a stranger to te (lead) behavior as for “not appreciating their temperament and attributes.” My father is ILI and my brother LIE. I manage to keep some Te egos around me usually.

[Zyan]

idk, I don't think that's true. I don't think there's one true type of LSE and should I not "appreciate them" that I "don't appreciate LSEs"

with anyways I adopt a bit of an Ni mindset, what will be...will be.

I also disagree "duals cannot really be like that" (pleasant and compatible, essentially).

If I've had part of it with an SLI it really shouldn't be so much of a stretch for behavior in an LSE. I didn't have to learn to appreciate that SLI; I just naturally trusted him like I've never anybody in my life and all he needed to do was be himself. I disagree that this cannot be recreated, even better, in duality.

...anyways, this thread is about mirage so...won't derail further.

I also don't think I want them to be "similar" to me; what I have described here and elsewhere is an opposite, a contrast. With some similarities of course. I would take on their traits as they would mine. Anyways, I think you may have misunderstood what I’ve communicated here and elsewhere as I’m not a stranger to te (lead) behavior as for “not appreciating their temperament and attributes.” My father is ILI and my brother LIE. I manage to keep some Te egos around me usually.

Maybe for someone who hasn't matured a day in her life, the "what will be...will be" mindset might seem fitting for them but the reality is people change and adapt all the time, if you're constantly learning and don't grow stagnant you will change. You also learn new things about yourself after each serious relationship, so unless you just had nothing to take from them(which honestly might just mean you're more of the issue) you will grow and probably become better in the process.

[Kalinoche buenanoche]

my current take on the ''what will be...will be'' thing is that it helps with taking perceptual breaks and this can be nurturing. I doubt that anyone can go around trying to make sure they apply this 24/7 because that would be the opposite of ''what will be...will be''. It's part of experiencing how observation and trust can play out for oneself.