School was nice. Living with conflictor parents it's always been nice to have a place to feel comfortable in. Generally all my classes were pretty pleasant to be in aside from literature(which was the one class where things almost always consistently felt like useless busy work). Best literature teacher I ever had was in 8th grade, he had a degree in journalism and seemed pretty ILE-ish from retrospective. In fact there have been alot of alpha teachers which I've seen over the years in school(especially in elementary and middle schools), which probably explains why the gamma equivalent of this thread includes alot more frustration than this one. Always tried to get into the hardest classes I could get into, because I found that the harder it was the more engaging, and doing busy work for a class where the topic was too easy made it so that I'd manage to get an A+ in an advanced Algebra 2, but only a A in health because I wasn't bothered to actually pay attention. There were 2 experiences that I had in school that I think really shaped my personality though, and formed me into a much weirder ILE than I would've been if I ended up staying roughly the same from elementary onwards. Both happened in middle school, in 7th grade.

First was inside of my math and science classes(of which my high school offered us advanced versions of for 7th graders), where I managed to earn a reputation of being the smartest kid in the room. I had a nice teacher in math(possibly LII), who would teach, and I would immediately understand whatever they were talking about. I'd be able to hold casual conversation in the middle of class with him, really engage in a way no one else in the room could, so I ended up getting the nickname "robot". Since those people happened to be in my other classes, (including my science in which I also did very well), I was able to basically be put on top of the highest pedestal, having the kids in the "smart" class all praising me as the smartest. I was a pretty quiet and easy to miss kid before, but after that I became so high off my own ego. It died down by high school, but I've still got some of it in me, just the assumption that I'm smarter and more capable than everyone else. It wasn't really an expectation to me either, it just simply was, since I could just be my natural self and have people praise me for it, and even though I would always get good grades, they weren't what defined me as smart.

Second was during an extracurricular I was, science olymiad. If any of you don't know what that is it's basically a kind of science competition where there's a bunch of events where you have to either answer questions or do activities. Overall I'd say it was very fun and stimulating for me, as the activities looking back required a college level understanding to really do. I did good too, the one subject I really got into was something that had to do with circuits, and I ended up getting a gold medal at regionals for it. It was very stressful and taxing though. I had nothing really done anything as big as that by that time, and so it was definitely a taste of what real hard work would be. One day, I was walking through the hallway to get from the computer room to work on something to the main room, and I saw one girl who was working on the hallway. I was walking with this other girl that I was working closely with on a couple of events, (who all I can really say concretely is that she was Fi polr), and before walking into the hallway I was thinking about how this girl who were about to walk past had somehow made us lose an event or something, idk I don't remember the specifics. The important thing though is that I decided I had to shame her for it. I walked down the hallway, talking to the other girl, and managed to maneuver the conversation in a way to maximize the impact, so that when we walked past her I said "ya [Name]" to basically blame her for our loss.

I then went back, did my stuff and completely forgot about what I had just done, until a little while later I was called out and I got to figure out what happened. She had, unsurprisingly, a mental breakdown when combined with the stress and made me have an "oh god what the fuck have I done" moment. My Fi polr had inadvertently fucked up so bad that I had to realize I had just managed to truly hurt someone, and I felt an incredible sense of guilt. Still feel guilty about it honestly, but what really cemented in was what happened during the rest of year. I eventually went up and stood in front of her some days/weeks later for probably around a minute or two, where she got to lambast me and maximize the guilt as much as she could. Kept me there until I almost ended up crying myself, before another girl who was there got her to stop so that I got to go back to another room and cry silently by myself. When we went to state and I was so tired after it was over, I cried the whole way on the bus ride home with my thoughts to myself. The girl I was talking with became a nightmarish figure to me, in my very thin inventory of dreams that I remember I remember having one with her where I felt helplessly trapped with her in a restaurant where she acted almost like a demon in my mind. Thing is two that working with and sharing trauma with the two girls meant that they were the closely that I had ever experienced intimacy up to that point, and since it was so pivotal now I've got guilt installed into intimacy, so now those things have been linked in mind and will probably fuck at least a bit with my future relationships.

So ya school was pretty fun overall.