I block off all my free time to think about my thoughts, though I have trouble speaking about them because I always feel weird talking about them.

Our relationship is mostly fine, but again he will come up with "Oh well it will just be better in real life because we are duals" or I don't know some bad explanation of things. I guess only I can help myself in this situation and it is something I must do for myself by myself.

Well I just feel abnormal for some reason...


I know my main problem is that I have trouble making short term goals and I have no help in that area... So if I focus a little more on making my to do list for the week I will feel slightly better. The main objective is to at least be able to move toward my main goals and try not to get distracted with excess thoughts...

Ah yes I am lonely, but it is my fault and I haven't really done much to fix that myself. I just feel like I don't get any help with things, but I realize that I shouldn't rely on anyone but myself to help myself.