Quote Originally Posted by YXPR View Post
ESTPs are not perfect. I've never met an SLE who could cook, clean, garden, surf, row boats, shoot, hunt and survive without complaint in the wild. And you might find their Fi polr endearing but most people don't. It's a pain in the ass for them just as much as your Te polr is a pain in the ass for you. I do think that duality is great but here you are idealizing your duals way too much.

You should look up threads about Fi polr on the forum. It might help you to understand how IEIs' Fi dem can help SLEs.

Please forget about all that stuff about IEIs having to keep SLEs happy and helping with their mood swings. This sounds a lot like submission and it's not the way to go. It's not your duty to make anyone happy.

When I think of my relationships with SLEs IRL I feel like I bring them the exact same thing that I bring to everybody else, they just seem more enthusiastic about it. Try to identify what you truly want to bring to someone in a relationship; that's what your dual will want to receive (and if they don't then they probably aren't the right dual for you).
Idealizing duals way too much... yeah, you're right. I expressed a lot of vulnerability in this post. Possibly relevant is my age. I'm very young and sorely undeveloped. To see someone be able to do all the things I struggle with such as 4D Se and 4D Te has inspired an inferiority complex and a grandiose impression of the sociotype.

Never met an SLE that does all that? Well I currently live in a rural setting. That could play a role. I've met ESTp's that live in the city and they do not have the arsenal of hobbies like this one does. Yeah, I guess I can see how Fi PoLR would be just as bad to them as Te is to me, I just ignore the occasional rudeness and uncouth outbursts, as well as the explosive and sudden way their insecurities manifest. I can tell that it is hell for them and they hate themselves for being bad at it but also cannot use the function properly. An ancedote that has suddenly come to mind is an ILE gave a compliment that was sweet enough in words - "You look cool", but the delivery was very aggressive and abrupt.

Thanks for your advice, I'l be pondering over it