Originally Posted by Akira
Also remember that a lot of duals who get together don’t know anything about socionics. You might just see each other as nice people from
the start. I think if I were to end up with a dual I’d end up with the ‘nice’ type..or what’s ‘nice’ to me anyway..or at least ‘nice’ for a partner..
There are SLEs I could be friends with- I see the good in them..but doesn’t mean they’d be right for me in a relationship.
I think we all just want to be recognised as good and special and this can feel more real with a dual I guess. It happens with non duals too..observing couples recently..the best ones seem mentally healthy with rewarding careers. (I think hobbies can also make life rewarding.)
I think an sle/ good partner..would help me get out of my head. Stop me daydreaming/ruminating so much and get me off the couch..make my impressions and ideas come more alive in convo with their own complimentary maybe more concrete observations.
re the IEI ‘niceness’..
yes I would want someone to ‘get’ that I ‘need’ to see the good in people. And sometimes this will mean me being critical about other people. Personally I’d want my partner to realise that I need to critique in order to reset..I bloody love people lol. Usually..(in my core mind I do anyway..socionics/big life stuff has messed with this though recently) and of course I can be a dark IEI too but in order to see the true goodness I guess I have to see the badness too.
I have to see the good in people though and want to help them feel special, listened to and like they are a good person. Inspire life into them. Their own goodness inspires me to be better (to live) and I can’t help but root for them. I’m inspired by the littlest things they do..I’m hardly aware of it haha. But then of course, things come apart a bit..I start to see the cracks and my mind (at the back) is like ahh but you’re a wonderful human being I need you to be wonderful, for me, for you, for everyone..
so I vent or discuss until it all makes sense again and I can go back to seeing them as the flawed but heroic person I was first inspired by. (Subconsciously I knew they were flawed from
the start but in my iei mind it’s hard to separate the flaws from the goodness..need to think about this more..) If an sle can help me on this mission, well that’s great haha. Maybe the sle appreciates me doing it for them too. Maybe they can help me see my flaws too and be more comfortable with them.
Last edited by Bethanyclaire; 01-21-2021 at 09:35 PM.
Overall, IEIs offer tactical perspectives when dealing with people - somewhat like a diplomat. Although SLEs can be somewhat strategic and practical in their thinking, they can also be overly transparent in a roguish sort of way and come across as untrustworthy or with hidden agendas - even when it's not true. They're often OK with things but clumsy with people whereas IEIs tend to be the opposite.
a.k.a. I/O
The forecasting between IEI and SLE will relate to more social aspects but it won't be any less important whatever the instinct stackings.
This makes me think of a story. It's about something that happened between me and an SLE that I've known since middle school. In order to understand it you have to know that we were both living in an area with a quite a lot of violence so avoiding bad people was very important.
The SLE used to love hanging out with a guy that in my eyes was the worst piece of shit in the world. The guy was a bully, the real mean and nasty kind. He would harass the weakest and smallest people at school (or the ones who already felt excluded by everybody) just for the fun of it. But for some reason, my SLE friend found him funny.
All throughout middle and then high school I kept telling him to stop hanging out with the bully. Their relationship really got under my skin because it was obvious to me that the bully didn't really have friends. He was smart, manipulative and just liked having a crowd. But the SLE just wouldn't listen.
After high school I moved out of town for my higher education and I lost touch with him. But one day he texted me out of the blue after years of not speaking to each other. He explained to me that the bully from school had just done him extremely wrong.
On a Saturday morning, the bully invited the SLE and another one of their "friends" to hang out. He told them to meet him in the hall of a building where they liked to spend time together sometimes. The SLE declined the invitation saying that it was way too early for a Saturday. The other one however still accepted to meet, but when he arrived in the hall a group of guys came out of nowhere and assaulted him. It was a trap and obviously the bully was in on it. The plan was to get the both of them beat up in a place where no one would see it.
When the SLE told me this I was shocked but I wasn't. I was just mad that it took this little ambush for him to finally realize that he should have listened to me.
It also makes me think of an SLE boss that I had while working for a small business (less than 15 people). When he wanted to hire a new person but wasn't too sure about them he would give me money to take them for drinks or to eat together with other colleagues. Then he would ask me if in my opinion the candidate would get along with the rest of the team.
Being useful is only one aspect of duality. SLEs are weak IEIs on the inside, and IEIs are weak SLEs on the inside. The functions complement each other in a way that's hard to explain. A SLE "doesn't lack" Ni, they have it, but it is weak, and the IEI "doesn't lack" Se, they have it but it is weak. Simply the presence of the inferior function will have a positive effect on the partner.
The decisive thing is not the reality of the object, but the reality of the subjective factor, i.e. the primordial images, which in their totality represent a psychic mirror-world. It is a mirror, however, with the peculiar capacity of representing the present contents of consciousness not in their known and customary form but in a certain sense sub specie aeternitatis, somewhat as a million-year old consciousness might see them.
(Jung on Si)
Well people aren't Swiss army knives or whatever. You should ideally be liked for who you are, not how 'useful' you can be to a person lol. That is just unhealthy narc crap regardless of sociotype. I cringed sometimes when watching Thomas the Train and they called Thomas a "really useful engine." Ugh fuck that Te valuing shit. FUCK YOUR TE SIR TOPHAM HAT!!!
I wouldn't get that infatuated when a SLE spits in ur mouth either or whatever- because chances are they do that to most everybody they meet anyway. It takes more than 4D Se to impress me - especially now since I'm not a teenager anymore lol. Instead I would teach them basic morals. You're supposed to be a morality and ethical pill they can swallow unlike EIIs. The IEI is supposed to be 'uhh don't do that, you'll go to prison lol' and the SLE should listen. ((instead the IEI not telling them due to infatuation and the SLE going to prison anyway.))
If I'm disrespected even once in a relationship- I immediately leave and let them known it won't happen again. I don't like the erotic attitudes being called 'victim' since I usually like to be on top in bed anyway as they have the most surge of power. Yet it does sometimes make me vomit to the type of abuse some IEI females seem to attract. ((I probably projected a lot of what IEI women deal with to 'all women' and I apologize for that, but forgive me as I do have lots of IEI female family members & friends.)) I personally wouldn't deal with that level of masochism lol. They don't seem to even like it much anyway- they always rant and complain to me about it. They like the emotional drama aspect of it but don't do well with the real sadism of it. Unhealthy relationships are unhealthy- I think there can be a thin line between being a 'submissive' and putting up with abuse.
Some things ur meant to masturbate in the bathroom or whatever as a fantasy. Ur not supposed to make 'everything real' like some IEI women try lol.
I tried to be sassy gay friend and avoid their fate but it didn't work like it did in the videos lololol
Last edited by Hot Scalding Gayser; 01-24-2021 at 04:02 AM.
Concise, and really hits the mark
Hahahaha, you're great. My sides . I love Ni base.
pretty sure Fe isn't about morals, see here: https://socioniks.net/article/?id=119 Fe is more like managing the social atmosphere kinda like being charismatic, passionate and such. Reminds me of the D&D Bard class managing the mood of the party.
What IEIs offer SLE's:
Source: http://wikisocion.net/en/index.php?t...ulenko#IEI-SLE5. Ni: dual-seeking function of ESTp and program function of INFp
IEI periodically makes "program" function statements that concern planning, since he sees very well the potential negative development of person's actions over time. He remembers past events and is able to use them to "catch" a person, to expose his cunning by use of a certain plan. The SLE listens to these statements, not questioning them as a whole, since that easily leads to an irritated reaction from the IEI. The SLE periodically comes to IEI for advice concerning this function, asking questions about forecasting the behavior of people: "What can be expected from this person?", "Is he being sincere or dishonest?", "Friend or foe?", etc. Commentary on this function should be issued in small portions and in the correct form. Not receiving advice regarding potential threats, the SLE is deprived of the point of application of his efforts. When the SLE does receive such a program, he becomes impassioned and starts to act resolutely.
hell yes Ti figured it out once again! nom nom
What IEI wants from SLE:
e_e further.. SLEs aren't criminal in general or such, they just don't understand relationships with other ppl well or the relationships amongst other ppl, they may assume someone is their friend, when they are not and then be surprised when they get "stabbed in the back" and such or they may react badly to something that wasn't intended as such. Very hard for them to figure this whole social relational stuff out. In contrast e as LSI I'm just overly suspicions of pp, not oblivious nor is it a complete blind spot for me, but for the SLE it is.1. Se: program function of ESTp and dual-seeking function of INFp
The SLE periodically makes "program" function statements about the need for resolute action, but never requires it to be undertaken immediately. The main requirement of his sensing "program" is the achievement of major objectives with application of force only when it's absolutely necessary. SLE's strategy is an open declaration of conflict with subsequent pressure exerted on his opposition through individuals who are able to exert such an influence. The IEI listening to these "program" statements shouldn't question them as a whole. Any remarks on this aspect should be made in small portions and in proper form. Criticisms of this kind are not possible because the IEI unconsciously seeks such manifestations of such resolute activity and willpower within his environment. On this same function the IEI turns to SLE for advice regarding abilities of different people, their strengths and weaknesses, their progress forward, etc. He seeks consultation regarding the degree of his own actions and efforts; not receiving advice of this kind the IEI being unaware of it advances with his/her own harsh "program".
Even SLE - IEI Fe interaction is something entirely different from moralizing4. Fi: vulnerable function of ESTp and demonstrative function of INFp
SLE poorly sees what relations are developing between people. He fears that his personal relationships will be put on display or used against him. It is difficult for him to openly express his sympathy for another person. He often makes mistakes when he assumes that someone relates to him well. Moving towards his purpose, he risks evoking bad attitudes in others when they notice his quality to not to stop at anything. IEI refrains from openly criticizing this function and treats it with understanding. Lecturing and annoying hectoring over this element can lead to a sharp deterioration of SLE's mood. The IEI unconsciously produces large psychological distances on this element, he as if slips away from his conversation partner, closes himself off behind a meaningless smile. Events that are relayed by his conversation partner do not affect him deeply. It is exactly these kind of elusively polite relations that seem inviting to the SLE, creating for him the stability of the external psychological situation.
To sum it up IEI provides SLE with guidance regarding goals, who to trust, who is friend or foe, where to maneuver and what could most likely happen. The SLE then accepts this and executes, flexibly maneuvering according to the IEI's advice and his/her own logic.6. Fe: activating function of ESTp and creative function of INFp
SLE feels uncomfortable when it's necessary to show negative emotions: blow some steam, start a personal quarrel, cry or yell at people. Therefore, he hold himself in an accentuated cool and confident manner and prefers to state things directly and succinctly: "I don't like this", "Leave, and go to another place" rather than raise any commotion. At the same time SLE requires periodic "charging up" with positive emotions. The IEI lifts his spirits with humor, funny antics and stories, and that he loves to fool around. Without such input SLE's vitality decreases. At the same time the "product" of IEI's ethical function, "to cause emotional reactions in people", is smoothed out by the fact that SLE will initiate emotional quarrels only over significant and important for him issues.
Last edited by SGF; 01-25-2021 at 01:52 PM.
Ok so because im new here i don't know how to respond to your paragraphs separately in neat blocks
I agree with BandD that IEI's improve SLE's morals but this is not a deliberate or conscious way sometimes. I've had a few SLE's say I made them want to be a better person. I didn't realise i had this effect, it came as a surprise to me. cuz I don't ACT like an ethical do-gooder all the time, for example i have a notorious history of cheating (yeah i know, im a piece of shit), i tell white lies for convenience, and i can stereotype certain groups of people who i think have bad intentions
Strat describes Fe in IEI's as "exceptional sincerity, sensitivity and tact (+Fe)" from the dual description https://www.the16types.info/vbulleti...Stratiyevskaya
IEI periodically makes "program" function statements that concern planning, since he sees very well the potential negative development of person's actions over time. He remembers past events and is able to use them to "catch" a person, to expose his cunning by use of a certain plan. The SLE listens to these statements, not questioning them as a whole, since that easily leads to an irritated reaction from the IEI. The SLE periodically comes to IEI for advice concerning this function, asking questions about forecasting the behavior of people: "What can be expected from this person?", "Is he being sincere or dishonest?", "Friend or foe?", etc. Commentary on this function should be issued in small portions and in the correct form. Not receiving advice regarding potential threats, the SLE is deprived of the point of application of his efforts. When the SLE does receive such a program, he becomes impassioned and starts to act resolutely.
This is interesting. I thought this was what everyone did, keep track of consequences of what something (health, relationship, activities) is progressing towards. The thought of not doing that would throw me off kilter
About the part of being aware of people's motives, I regularly consult my ILI friend to confirm or invalidate my suspicions, since I am not that clever and I project my own assumptions of what is wrong and right. For example: *Older man is overly friendly to me and makes a few questionable comments*
*in my head: Hmmm, this is a bit weird, but he wouldn't dare pass that boundary. He must know I'm too young for him. I'm just going to assume he's being friendly.*
*Later on, someone tells me yes it is weird, and i fearfully have my suspicions confirmed*
One way I make commentary on the character quality of others is I tell people close to me whether I think the company they keep is good for them or if they are below their standard and dragging them down. I am surprised when I see someone consistently spending time with a low-life that doesn't positively benefit them at all. Move onto greener pastures I say
Also, a question for you, do you see yourself similar to the ILI type?
What are the major differences?
I have the hardest time telling these types apart.
@shotgunfingers
You misunderstand. The point is people need help with their polr the most and sometimes the 4D functions of the 8th function can be conflictor-ish and seemingly ego at times to help the other person truly grow. I think people have this misconception that demonstrative function is about overly coddling somebody's weaknesses , which disgusts me. On the same token if an IEI refuses to face any Te and just floats in outer space- a SLE can't save them either no matter how much they 'love' them. So many times dual relationships can be 'supervisor-lite' or 'conflictor-lite' for this reason.
And yeah look at how shitty their Fi polr is. Am I supposed to pretend it's not shitty because I like them and cuz of 'duality'? lol they certainly aren't doing that for my Te.... they need a harsh EII to offend them sometimes really. ILEs protect my Te better but then again I don't like them as much either.
I don't know any healthy SLE-IEI couple that worked out because of infatuation, which is a huge moral flaw. Yes usually the IEI will be 'infatuated' with the SLE in a weird way and get a weird one-sided crush and confuse some logical mechanical moments of psychological protection as "romance." But this infatuation is so dangerous to be overly nice to somebody and look over their flaws because you like them and often these aren't a 'relationship' so much as the person just being used and manipulated in a completely one-sided way. In the end they just end in disaster.
Fi is what makes you capable of real love & the means to truly protect a relationship, if it's your weakness- you have huge issues. You can't even be in a relationship in the first place lol there's nothing. They need corrective of that weird immoral shit. I'm not going to be like 'aw how cute a sociopathic asshole' like some typical air headed demented IEI that needs to be euthanized.
/summons Maritsa the Berserker class on y'all.
The "us vs them" mentality is supposed to be stereotypical beta quadra tbh. I do it as well. IEIs have 4D Fi creative in model G at least, so their Fi is as strong as a EII's, however it isn't valued, so it manifests like this:
"2. Realization Function —R — Relations Ethics aka Fi
IEI reinforces her attitude with actions. For loved ones, she will do a lot.
She becomes enterprising if she feels she is gaining sympathy from others.
She reliably performs her present duties only in a team with an established
system of interpersonal relationships. She warns that personal enmity and
disagreement will lead to the collapse of the business. She does everything
she can to ensure that business relations are accompanied by favorable
informal ties. She introduces a harmonizing force into the work collective.
Capable of persuading people, she manages her relationships in such a way
that the business turns to its advantageous side. She successfully uses
acquaintances and personal charm."
IEI Fe:
Demonstrative Function +E — Emotional Ethics aka Fe
She is well-versed in the laws of the emotional lives of people. She is
able to make requests at the right time (when a person is in
a good mood), so it is difficult to refuse her. She reacts sensitively to the
funny things in life and she loves humor. She jokes, fools around, and
bothers people close to her, creating positive emotions in a variety of
ways. She is peaceful and cannot tolerate quarrels between people who are
close to her. She forgives easily and is willing to make sacrifices for the
sake of remedying a conflict. She is inwardly anxious. IEI experiences a
lot, but hides excitement and a bad mood behind a soft smile.
as you can see neither is really about morality, which imo is something unrelated to socionics.
[B]
Also, a question for you, do you see yourself similar to the ILI type?
What are the major differences?
I have the hardest time telling these types apart.
Yeah, I think this is true. The point I'm trying to make is that Fi isn't rly about morals its mainly about interpersonal relationships.. so the IEI is passively improving the SLE's ability to form better interpersonal relationships and interpret these without annoying the SLE due to Fi while excellent in strength not being valued by the IEI. I guess one can say that makes the SLE a better person.. but the SLE could just stay an asshole with bad intentions benefiting from the IEI helping them interpret and make more sense of their interactions with others. There is a difference between results and intention imo and I see this more from a deontological perspective and not from a consequentialist one. If the SLE's results in interaction improve, but his/her innate core motivation is not there.. that just means he/she is unintentionally appearing to become a better person.
In reverse the SLE might be genuinely a good person with good intentions, but due to Fi PolR the results in relationships with other ppl end up bad. In this case the IEI would have a similar effect of helping the SLE appear to become a better person, but the SLE was like that from the start
^^' EXIs are not saints ye know.
Last edited by SGF; 01-27-2021 at 06:17 AM.
Good reminders before my date with a red-flaggy SLE....strongly agree with what you said about Fi, too.
Don't wanna discourage you too much @Emily but yeah be careful and love yourself first most of all. <3
Not discouraging at all, more like a good reality check
HEY YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT ME
im the airhead IEI infatuated with an SLE...that needs to be vaccinated
i agree with you on most parts because you have some really original insights, but I'm not sure that SLEs really do care about Te PoLR.
in fact the SLE i am currently with, the inspiration for my embarrassing post, offered to support me entirely on their income. They also don't ask triggering Te questions like "so what are your plans for work/schooling/etc", "you should really get xyz and z going and then you can xyz" that awkwardly draw attention to my lack of practical acumen.
On the contrary when I was with an SEE they bugged me a lot about Te stuff. SEEs (and gammas in general) are the ones that wanna push you and make you work. Before the SEE I was with an ESI dude that pushed me in the same manner. Under Te in dual descriptions, Gulenko: Intrusive tips and annoying reminders about how to handle money (IEI is wasteful, uneconomical), the need to work, to be thrifty, to not be lazy, etc., can easily ruin IEI's mood and serve as a latent reason for quarrels. - Yeah, shamefully this was the situation.
My SEE was an ungrateful asshole, so he'd probably seem like an SLE, and he typed as a logical when he took the test. Maybe all sensor assholes get put down as SLE. But some are real sweethearts and even coo when they see a cute animal.
How I see Fi PoLR, removed from just being an asshole = not being able to open up about personal sentiments and feelings, needing a lot of alone time/being anti-social in the sense that their social battery is very low, low patience for polite small talk and/or pretending to care about what someone is talking about, being unable to "tolerate" people and be patient with them, not being able to indulge someone confiding about private stuff, being paranoid about negative signals in body language or tone, blurting out awkward remarks. Even being OVERLY polite is something I've noticed in Fi PoLRs, at least in the beginning. And that's where the IEI or SEI comes in and jokes about them being so polite, and then the tension goes away, and banter ensues >
@shotgunfingers
Aha yes, us vs them. I find it easier to quickly find a familiar language with Gammas than alpha/delta because of this because they're also edgelords.
yeah, i agree. i started off in life with empathy but no morals, if that makes sense. Morals are learnt. I think morals require a deeper understanding of a situation/person. If you ever have kids have them read Enid Blyton around the age of 8. Her books are very morally enriching.
Brain chemicals may play a role too. Serotonin/dopamine levels, thyroid metabolism, drug use, mood disorders, childhood trauma. My moral compass goes away when my blood sugar drops and I start to think like an animal. We are influenced a lot by our bodily tides. I know a drugged up EIE that resembles an SLE caricature.
Makes sense. LSI and SLE I noticed always have to be physically occupied with something and hate lazing around, unless they're drinking alcohol. I hate lazing around too but I feel like I also need a reason to move, lol
Hmm.. other things, well I'm more comfortable and willing to engage someone in a physical confrontation aka a fight. I may discharge aggression by impacting the physical world aka break shit when angry.
Oh yeah, I see it. I've seen an LSI angry before. It was quite scary. Someone kept moving his stuff. Socionics is right when it mentioned that LSI's really hate their belongings being tampered with.
I think you're right - which is why a few SLEs I know might be mistyped. I think I just playing a "victim" role tho and wanted to be proven wrong though to make myself feel better as I realize my post was dramatically negative and subversive, so thank you.i agree with you on most parts because you have some really original insights, but I'm not sure that SLEs really do care about Te PoLR.
But I still think it's stupid to be infatuated with them. They are really awesome though right. <3
Np bb girl
I think you're right - which is why a few SLEs I know might be mistyped. I think I just playing a "victim" role tho and wanted to be proven wrong though to make myself feel better as I realize my post was dramatically negative and subversive, so thank you.
But I still think it's stupid to be infatuated with them. They are really awesome though right. <3
I have the same. I just want to be proven wrong sometimes when i purge my negative projections.
It is stupid to be infatuated with them, yesinfatuation is like a person being your drug of choice and it's very unwell behavior.
they are awesome, yeep
IEIs can caution SLEs from fake friends and give advice on how to handle ethical matters.ESTp's are so perfect. They can do anything. They can cook, clean, garden, surf, row boats, shoot, hunt, survive without complaint in the wild, make a bedside table.
IEI"s are useless and we don't do anything
So called Dualisation has just brought impending doom upon me. An ego death to the max. A bundle of insecurity and self jabs. I kind of realized how crap my psycho-type is only when a SLE enters the picture. Their social skills aren't even as bad as I thought they'd be for a Fi PoLR, their blasé attitude is very endearing. So I can't even feel more competent in that aspect. Being an IEI is a cursed existence.
What the hell do we bring to the table?Why don't SLE score a hot and confident ESE instead?
Ok so a few questions. First, if you are IEI, do you have something similar in the presence of an SLE? Do you feel bedazzled and paralyzed by their sheer competence, "can do" attitude, strength, everything. How do you deal with this. I cannot function in the presence of a god.
And secondly if you are another type or IEI yourself, what the hell does the IEI supply the SLE? How can IEI be useful to them? And it also be a fair exchange?
Is it an equal trade off (IEI helps soothe the SLE's mood swings, is all patient with their impulses and keeps them "happy", and the SLE is all practical and useful and physically motivated), because the SLE is good at and enjoys being active, but the IEI not as much, so it's actually no biggie *shrugs nonchalantly* for the both of them? Is that it?
I still think it's more about the ESTps mood swings than advising about how to pick friends.I honestly don't think I ever give advice on the latter (maybe if asked, okay, but it's not that this situation comes up a lot usually.).
Also the making duality work article mentions this specifically: "Despite these natural inclinations, many members of this type are not even aware of their enormous potential and often suffer from lack of confidence, or hold some irrational notions. They need a partner who demonstrates inexhaustible optimism and faith in the success of any endeavor. The main thing is to rid these people of their anxieties, suspicions and doubts – the rest they will overcome themselves."
I find it hilarious that as an EII, your description of the SLE made me want to barf. 😂
I’ve known quite a few IEIs (and SLEs). Personally, I don’t think SLEs would ever be able to truly actualize their ambitions without the support of an intuition that is on par with IEI’s. They talk very big and will never approach any endeavor without giving off the impression that they are completely resolute and confident in their ability to accomplish exactly what they want; but what actually seems to happen is that SLE starts running in circles because there is no underlying purpose to propel them forward in the direction they took.
IEIs are undoubtedly the most cunning type. You observe and absorb details like a sponge, creating a framework that enables you to insert yourself into any situation you please with your charm. It’s hard to lose with that ability, which SLEs, although they may try, cannot replicate. So the IEI is the missing piece to the “victory” SLE is always struggling for
I would not describe myself as cunning..just saying.
As an SLE, every IEI I've met inspires me. It's what they say, believe & think. It isn't just they're relationship to SLE but the inspiration they can bring to the world. They might not always be correct but I dig hearing them out anyway
With not being an id**t and as**ole. with having 24/7 sex with me. (this is priority of all, physical! f**k romance and these sh**y things, just sex and physical touch!) with not betraying me. with not pretending she isn't interested (because if she isn't, the door is open)
also, with not being an Asian.
simple things. I, as an SLE, love simplicity of things. I don't like deep and meaningful things. sc*ew them. f**k them.
period.
bringing sensitivity towards difficult people when I would tend towards callous
bringing diplomacy when I'm cool with burning the bridge and being done with it
keeping me connected to groups/society when I have no faith in people
knowing my tastes and bringing me interesting Ni stuff to dig into
injecting a sense of wonder & doubt into everyday life I would get bored with quick otherwise
going with the flow
taking me in stride so I can be myself without having to hold back
being discrete
I actually don't "expect" anything from IEI or "need" anything from them. That sounds utilitarian. When IEI fully realize themselves & self actualize it's fucking cool. Just having a cup of coffee with a person like that is nice. I've met IEI veterinarians who were the most beautiful people not cause I wanted something but because they were making a difference in way that gave them meaning
Know the best time and place to X Y and Y
-
Dual type(as per tcaudilllg)
Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?
I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE
Best description of functions:
http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html
SLEs need to accept that not every person has a use.
They are personal cheerleaders and give fate for continuation to SLE's. Simple as as that.
MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
Winning is for losers
Sincerely yours,
idiosyncratic type
Life is a joke but do you have a life?
Joinif you dare https://matrix.to/#/#The16Types:matrix.org
This sounded so much like me, I've been officially typed as an SLE but I still kind of think of myself as an EIE, but this sounded so close to me.How I see Fi PoLR, removed from just being an asshole = not being able to open up about personal sentiments and feelings, needing a lot of alone time/being anti-social in the sense that their social battery is very low, low patience for polite small talk and/or pretending to care about what someone is talking about, being unable to "tolerate" people and be patient with them, not being able to indulge someone confiding about private stuff, being paranoid about negative signals in body language or tone, blurting out awkward remarks. Even being OVERLY polite is something I've noticed in Fi PoLRs, at least in the beginning. And that's where the IEI or SEI comes in and jokes about them being so polite, and then the tension goes away, and banter ensues >
I am terrible at connecting to other people, I'm not an asshole although I can be one. It makes me depressed that I can't connect with other human beings in any effective way.
I worked with an obvious ESI and she was one of those really strident SJW types of girls. Almost everything I said was offensive to her and I had no idea what I should say that wouldn't offend her. I'm not saying I say offensive shit, but there's a softer touch I need or I'll get very uncomfortable.
For example:
The ESI was talking about never wanting to get married (bare with me lol, she really is an ESI) she said if she did get married she would just get married at a courthouse and not worry about a ring.
I laughed at this openly and said that you will want a ring with a real diamond like all women. (I know that this wasn't appropriate but I wasn't thinking.)
An SEI then laughed at me and asked me how I know what all women want.
I immediately knew that I put my foot in my mouth and corrected what I said.
The ESI was silently fuming.
This sort of thing happens often.
The ESI was also constantly obsessed with all of the things celebrities said and who should and shouldn't be "canceled".
I don't want to perpetuate that bad Fi makes you an evil sociopath but I do feel like Patrick Bateman a lot, where I'm basically pretending to be human. I care about people but I feel distant from them.
…there is an idea of a Patrick Bateman, some kind of abstraction, but there is no real me, only an entity, something illusory, and though I can hide my cold gaze and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable: I simply am not there.
It could be just my personal background (my parents were distant and abusive) but it also sounds like Fi PoLr.
I supposed the SEI or IEI would help place me within society and social groups and show me where I fit and where I belong.
The Barnum or Forer effect is the tendency for people to judge that general, universally valid statements about personality are actually specific descriptions of their own personalities. A "universally valid" statement is one that is true of everyone—or, more likely, nearly everyone. It is not known why people tend to make such misjudgments, but the effect has been experimentally reproduced.
The psychologist Paul Meehl named this fallacy "the P.T. Barnum effect" because Barnum built his circus and dime museum on the principle of having something for everyone. It is also called "the Forer effect" after its discoverer, the psychologist Bertram R. Forer, who modestly dubbed it "the fallacy of personal validation".
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