Hello, long time that i've been on this site. For the people who don't know me, i used to be very active member, but havent been active on the site for 5 years.
There is some interesting new stuff i found, i thought you geeks would have already figured it out too, but it seems not
The 4 tendencies from Gretchen Rubin is VERY INTERESTING if you like typology and relationships.
The book/theorie is around already for 3 years.
First I will summarize the typology (very simple) and then the relationships (which Gretchen overlooked for half the types), so you guys are up te date.
It is simply dichotomy, just answer these two questions:
How do you deal with outside expectations, you resist or you try to fullfill them. How do you deal with your own expectations, you resist or you try to fullfill them.
The upholder: Fullfill, Fullfill
The questioner: Resist, Fullfill
The obliger: Fullfill, Resist
The rebel: Resist, Resist
Now a lot of your behaviour will start to make sense. In my own experiences: Upholders are often complaining about other people not doing things right. They keep everything tidy and often in service of others. The questioner is compettive, seductive and a taker/salesperson and asks a lot (nosy) questions. The obliger is a pleaser, often chubby can't keep a diet and sometimes used by others. The rebel doesn't care about rules, feels free to do whatever he wants.
As you might notice, and Gretchen Rubin noticed it somewhat too, there are 2 dominant types and 2 submissive types. Gretchen noticed that rebels and obligers often were a couple.
She didn't mention questioners and upholders, however i think they are a couple too. The reasoning is like this:
Both the rebel and obligers are 'givers', since they don't want much for themselves.(both resist inside expectations) But the rebel is the leader of the pair and the obliger the follower.
Both the questioner and the upholders are 'takers' since they want to fullfill their own expections. The questioner is the leader of the pair cause he doesn't care to much to fullfill others expectations, and the less assertive upholder is the follower in the relationship pair.
So here we have a new kind of duality(complementary) going on. VERY INTERESTING. Ofcourse this is not just theory, cause i experiment these things in real life :-D and it does seem to work out like this.
For me socionics is still very relevant, the tools a person possesss, instinct stackings the path in life they follow, and the tendencies are the role they have in a relationship(!)
Try to figure these people out in your close surroundings, and you'll notice a lot of similarities and patterns!