Benefactors & Beneficiaries
I think there is this genuine affection & empathy with beneficiary and benefactor relationships that I really like. At least in my own experiences there is. I genuinely like ESIs and LIIs, and LIIs and ESIs genuinely like me and it's really nice cuz there is a lot of cruelty in the world and it's refreshing sometimes to experience simple kindness and affection. I'm not sure.... you can 'do' anything with this affection per se like in a real tangible way lol but it's nice. I've also noticed in real life, I feel like I can approach ESI a bit easier even tho I'm shy withdrawn & victim-y- like they very organically help me be more confident and outgoing.
I mean I get the 'dark side' too. I think sadly you can't help but come across like you feel like you're better than your beneficiary because of the logical placement of the functions. But it's like I get that they don't do it 'on purpose' it is all deeply psychological stuff- so I usually don't get pissed at ESIs when they act uppity.
This is how ESI-IEI-LII beneficiary ring feels to me. I'm sure it might feel different for other rings, or other IEIs will have very different experiences with their ESI-IEI-LII rings. What do you feel about your benefactor-beneficiary ring? Maybe it's not as positive as mine, or more positive or... idk, share your thoughts.
I would say I have usually pretty (or even very) positive relationships with my beneficiaries (EIIs) and not that close, but still okay/cool/good relationships with LSIs. Probably based on Fi vs Fe difference.
Originally Posted by BandD
Beneficiary: I donít know any ESEs other than one aunt who I donít even like or say anything to. The whole family says sheís stupid and although I agree, I donít say anything terrible about her.
Benefactor: Itís not like I get along with every LIE, but I havenít met one I dislike. Usually they come to me if they want to give me professional advice or provide me mentorship. Iíve had several mentors who are LIEs, one Iím still friends with after 10 years. We met at the gym.
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I admire SLI for their skill in anything they do. I admire IEI for their ability to get along with almost anyone and their writing abilities.
I really like my beneficiaries/benefactors too
I tend to get along with my benefactors (SEI)
Not sure about SEEs
I feel safe with them, as the power dynamics are fairly well established immediately; however, the power is not completely disproportional, and the Benefactor still appreciates what the Beneficiary can bring. For example, I know almost immediately when I meet an EIE that I have the "upper hand"; however, I still find them lovely company - Fe + Ni matches Ne + Fe well. Same thing with LSEs - I always sense quite quickly that they have the upper hand; however, they appreciate my jokes and antics. Also, as we both are Ne + Si + strong in T, I communicate with them very well in business settings; they are not nearly as cut-throat as Gamma and Beta thinkers and I actually get a much stronger sense that we are working together to "build" something than I do with many other types. Also, as we are both extroverts we are both typically willing to go out for a beer after it all and talk about things.
I am really drawn to ILEs but I seem to come off as a wet blanket to them.
SEEs are fun but exhausting to me.