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Thread: Does Fat Shaming Work?

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    Default Does Fat Shaming Work?

    Does making fun of people for being fat actually make them want to slim down? Discuss.

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    Quote Originally Posted by xerxe View Post
    Does making fun of people for being fat actually make them want to slim down? Discuss.
    I think shaming people for being fat probably does make them want to slim down, but "wanting" and "being able" are two different things.

    I've been slim all my life, up until the last few years of my marriage, when I gained about forty pounds from drinking and eating too much and being in complete denial about my unhappiness. I took a picture of myself on the day after my last drinking session, unshaven, hung over, after my last drink ever, and a few years later, I showed it to my mother. She said, "Who is that?" I said, "It's me, mom." She said, "No." Lol. Let me tell you, I'm not posting that picture anywhere on the web.

    After my ex left the marriage, I lost thirty pounds effortlessly. And I mean, I expended zero effort towards losing weight and it just came off. Unfortunately, I started looking like a skeleton. A very old skeleton. Most of my more recent pictures on here are after I gained back fifteen pounds.

    I'm still heavier than I want to be. But I can't seem to lose any weight. Maybe I live too close to the refrigerator.

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    Quote Originally Posted by xerxe View Post
    Does making fun of people for being fat actually make them want to slim down? Discuss.
    not an incisive, strategic method.

    even the aim is a problem, though. Look up the stats on the huge group of skinny unhealthy people and their risk of heart attack, diabetes, and cancer. Then look at sizeable portion of people who are carrying around extra energy and yet are NOT AT ANY INCREASED RISK.
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    Of course not. It implies the fat shamer actually has positive intention but in reality they just want to be a jerk with no consequences. 'I'm being mean and harsh for your own good' doesn't really work that well in reality.

    I mean in theory I guess I could be motivated by somebody shaming me but it would have to be such a strong Fi bond and I would have to really be close and know the person for that to be 'okay.' Some random bully and asshole idiot thinking they could treat me that way under the guise of 'Help.' Ugh. No. That's more revolting than just being mean.

    reminds me of how I feel about the Milo guy. While I agree with him, PC culture can be abusive and overly rigid and authorative- at the same time his Mean Girl faggy comments just adds fuel to the fire and doesn't really help anything either.

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    When I was a kid, my nickname in my family was just “fat girl” in Chinese. Instead of my name they would just call me that. At school, some of my friends called me “beluga whale”.

    It only works if you have the resources to get away from stress and slim down / be healthy. If you’re in a situation where you’re a) large to the point of being unhealthy and/or b) going to be mocked for your body or other superficial reasons, then the problem is your situation, not your body.

    PS I wasn’t even really fat lol, they were just being dicks.

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    Probably not but encouraging obesity and unhealthy living is not a good thing either

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    I mean it can probably help people who are just a bit overweight to slim down but i think when it's like chronic obesity they already reached a stage where they can't fully and consciously be bothered by what other ppl think, even tho the shame may subconsciously be there. I dont really understand the psychology of obesity but seems complex and i feel for them

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    Shaming annuls any claim you're doing it for the good of the person being shamed.

    If you claim you're doing it because a universal healthcare system takes extra strain for every overweight person, well, then in theory, the first thing you do is stop giving free treatments for directly weight-caused health problems, to the extent that that unhealthy weight is in fact the result of poor choices and not uncontrollable factors. Hypothetically, of course.

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    Sometimes people just need a kick in the ass to reach their goals and stay on track, and a bit of "tough love" is needed to be given, even with me.

    The psychology of food really does suck here in America at least, they put high amounts of sugar (or some form of it), fats, and sodium in pretty much everything on the shelves, so everyone is cracked out all the time even if they don't realize it. Luckily as a kid I couldn't stand soda, Kool Aid, or Hawaiian Punch because I was boring so I only drank water (deadass, I only drank water until I was 17 or so because soda burned my throat lmao) so I didn't run around high on sugar or anything. But the people here really do become dependent on the foods they eat since they're so high in sugar, fats, and sodium, and even the foods marketed as healthy are usually high in these in some form (dates, nuts, so on).

    The truly healthy food that's free of sugar, lower in fats and sodium, higher in fiber, is much more expensive and not as accessible for most people. Even homemade recipes are not feasible for most since produce is expensive in certain states.
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    Works for the person doing the shaming, usually makes them feel better / superior / etc.
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    Who cares if it works? It's fun and fat people deserve to be mocked.

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    Everyone shamed me for not seeing the movie "Dirty dancing", for a while now, and just last night the idea finally popped up into my head to watch it. Maybe the shame was buried deep into my subconscious?

    What would be considered fat-shaming though? Telling them to hit the gym or straight out making fun of them? Some people consider the former fat-shaming.

    But better to be shamed for obesity than praised for being unhealthy, I guess, since it's something totally under your control.

    Makes me think of Jared from the subway commercials
    Last edited by fireee; 08-27-2020 at 11:46 AM.

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    We should all embrace the HAES movement...

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    verbal abuse is never good for anyone's mental so no
    it might help to some extent but who's to say that person is even in the proper state of mind to take such words?
    someone could be at their breaking point to kill themselves and u wouldn't even know
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    Quote Originally Posted by Synchrony View Post
    We should all embrace the HAES movement...
    as long as nobody is expecting me to find obese ppl "sexy".


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    Treat a morbidly obese person how you would treat an anorexic one. The mental complexes can be just as labyrinthine.

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    Quote Originally Posted by shotgunfingers View Post
    as long as nobody is expecting me to find obese ppl "sexy".

    Ha I was joking around. HAES kind of scares me tbh.

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    Might make them eat more...to me it seems like an addiction, similar to a drug addiction. I feel like major life changes is what usually makes people loose weight, usually not of their own choosing. But from what I’ve seen shaming and nitpicking doesn’t usually help, especially longer term. And it’s just assholish imo. Do you really want to be that asshole?
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    Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
    Might make them eat more...to me it seems like an addiction, similar to a drug addiction. I feel like major life changes is what usually makes people loose weight, usually not of their own choosing. But from what I’ve seen shaming and nitpicking doesn’t usually help, especially longer term. And it’s just assholish imo. Do you really want to be that asshole?
    Yes. It is an addiction... often classified as Binge-Eating Disorder.

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    Shaming only makes people try to hide problems as they grow even more out of control. If it does anything, it's making things worse and hinting that the shamer is actually full of shame over their own self-image ime.

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    Quote Originally Posted by sbbds View Post
    When I was a kid, my nickname in my family was just “fat girl” in Chinese. Instead of my name they would just call me that. At school, some of my friends called me “beluga whale”.

    It only works if you have the resources to get away from stress and slim down / be healthy. If you’re in a situation where you’re a) large to the point of being unhealthy and/or b) going to be mocked for your body or other superficial reasons, then the problem is your situation, not your body.

    PS I wasn’t even really fat lol, they were just being dicks.
    My aunt's childhood nickname was 'gorda.' Same meaning as yours. Everyone in the family called her that well into adulthood. I always wondered if that wasn't a little tough for her, although there wasn't shaming intent behind it (seen as more cute).

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    Quote Originally Posted by ninaus View Post
    My aunt's childhood nickname was 'gorda.' Same meaning as yours. Everyone in the family called her that well into adulthood. I always wondered if that wasn't a little tough for her, although there wasn't shaming intent behind it (seen as more cute).
    Did she seem distressed by it or do you know if she saw herself as fat? In my case there was definitely a shaming aspect at least sometimes.

    I will still remember these 2 instances for the rest of my life:
    - My ESI classmate / later friend grabbing my arm and calling me “fucking fat bitch” in Chinese in the 3rd grade
    - 2 of my aunties (IEI and ILE) discussing whether to give me 1% or 2% milk in the same room as me and laughing assholishly

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    It works, but not much. People reduce the weight mainly by other reasons.
    Types examples: video bloggers, actors

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    I haven't asked her about it directly. She has been slim for most of her adult life but was chubby as a kid. It's definitely a different culture and a common term of endearment, where "gorda" would be used more like in the same context as "fofa" or something similarly affectionate. Still, it's the sort of thing where the offense could vary depending on individual sensitivities and specific context. What you went through sounds so harsh, it's terrible, just bullying.

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    Guess I could add my mom is overweight and my dad would do the whole fat shaming thing to her once in a while and I would see how she would react to this kind of thing. Suppose it also depends on the person, how they react to it. Some people are a lot more sensitive. She didn’t handle it too terribly, calls it her ‘Pollyanna attitude’, but I know she’s really insecure about it. She tells me about how she wants to loose weight and can’t, then tells me what she’s eating (which usually is not ideal weight loss food), but she likes good meals, likes food. Sometimes people say they want to loose weight but they have a hard time giving up the stuff they like, don’t want to actually take the steps to do it. She did lose weight once, after something terrible happened to her. But she ended up gaining it all back. I think a lot of it is genetics and the way she is built. She is built a lot like her father, who had same problems.
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    I'm against it, even if it "works" in a few cases.


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    Quote Originally Posted by onfireee View Post
    Everyone shamed me for not seeing the movie "Dirty dancing", for a while now, and just last night the idea finally popped up into my head to watch it. Maybe the shame was buried deep into my subconscious?
    did you watch it
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kalinoche buenasnoches View Post
    did you watch it
    i did. it was great

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    It's not about whether it helps or not, it's that they deserve it

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