Passions are the reason we do anything at all. Therefore, everything, even truth-seeking, must be done in their service. When a truth overrides the ego's own will to exist, it's akin to a mind parasite.
It can't be overemphasized that these "holy books" began with these very wisdom traditions predicated upon such "higher truths." They gained the appearance of incoherence upon layers of layers of divorce from their initial contexts and traditions, until now, naive moderns see them as the apotheosis of incoherence. It is not our age that is an age of anachronism and schizophrenia, it is every age but the first.In what way are they higher truths may you ask? What makes them worth suffering for? In that they lessen suffering not now, but ever after. They lessen suffering not only for you, but for everyone. Because they transcend my or your life; they make you strong. The truths you like are like candy; they make you lazy, weak, dependent on some holy book in order to understand the world around you; but you were dependent of your tastes all along anyway, weren't you? Higher truths give you the choice to accept life as it is; they give choices! and only with this gift, free will, can you start to suffer for something instead of from something. You have the choice; will you make life better for everyone?
We suffer not for our desires, but when our desires conflict with our surroundings. The will to live alone is a noble enough reason to fight; a loftier reason will not give us any greater means to achieve it, it will only be less attainable and breed more suffering. And ironically, fighting for "something greater" is a loftier battle than simply fighting for one's own meager self, and being satisfied with that alone.
You speak of "holy books" with the subtle connotation that they are mere dogma the ruling class commandeers to control us; when ironically, desiring "something to believe in" is equally a call of enlistment to holy war, for a cause with no guaranteed reward.
Suffering, or suffering for anything, is not noble in a vacuum. What causes pleasure is good; what causes suffering is bad! There is no need to invert this! To romanticize one's own suffering is the cope of the beaten dog. He has no guarantee his pain will amount to any good in the end; he must tell himself it will in order to treat the pain. But how can a wound be desirable because it compels us to numb it with morphine? Better had the wound never been inflicted, and the morphine never needed.
If I willed death, I'd calmly accept the mark for death Nature has placed upon my head, rather than kick and scream for my own good. If suffering for something is noble in itself, I'm on the right track.You say you oppose "every truth that refutes your will of life"; but isn't this struggle the negation of the will of life itself? You are engaged in an never-ending cycle of suffering and struggle, diminishing with every revolution, undermining your strength with each fight. In that state, what will of life are you talking about? Shouldn't it be better referred to as a will of death?
You refuse to make sacrifices to the "selfish God of Truth", but let me ask you: who is selfish by never wanting to suffer? You! Projecting your selfishness on truth is just another trick of your ego to make you run away from pain.
The hard boundary of selfish and unselfish is an illusion. If a collective were infinitely unselfish, it would willingly serve the interests of even its enemies. That a group will act to preserve itself demonstrates its selfishness. Moreover, a group's self-interest requires not only the continued existence of some number of its parts, but also the integrity of the connections between them. Whereas an individual's self-interest, in the end, asks nothing but the continued existence of that individual. He asks little, he binds few people to his own will, the ties around him may form and break as they please, but in the end, he wishes nothing but to Be.
Which then is the more rapacious, the more fecund and all-consuming? The one who seeks only his own good, or the engine that demands expansion and compliance? Which one grows and devours more of the heavens, infinitely replicating itself over the immense beauty and diversity that once was, replacing it with concrete, drab, uniform, consistency?
Certainly not the selfish individual. Only the selfish group. The selfish truth. The Selfish God.