Life With a Dual
This is to people who have specifically LIVED WITH a dual who they are in LTR good terms with
( @mrrrmaid @Tommy @Aaron Something ... )
So I’d like to exclude cases where you guys broke up eventually as that hints at some kind of TR or NTR mismatch or less-than-ideal duality, unless you guys dated and lived together for 5+ years or something.
How has life with a dual been different from life without a dual around?
I don't live with my dual.Originally Posted by sbbds
So I do not think I could help much, but i'll still talk... there's a lot of free time to do lots of stuff I normally would do without them around. SLI's give me lots of space and that's something I truly like. Besides the fact that SLI's I know don't get offended by my sense of humour and poking, and they usually know how to retaliate (meanwhile, my female LSE friend just gets mad and punches me, which is also fun), so it's fun.
That’s a useful response anyway. Do you think you’d want to live with or spend more time around your dual? Why or why not?
Totally, I love the physical care they give me and how they can calm my ADHD and anxiety, besides some OCD traits I have.
I didn’t know that you identified with having such traits, but I could imagine it I guess.
You remind me a lot of an IEE guy I met (the only one IEE I went as far as to be romantic with a bit, although I did go on a date with another one who turned out to be way more out there crazy), and I once went to his place and it reminded me of Serial Experiments Lain’s room if you’ve ever seen that anime. It was literally like this
In one room, except spanning an entire room instead of just one wall, and his entire flat was dark/creepy dungeon-esque. It was possible he bought/sold computer parts as a hobby side job, although I remember he told me he was a nurse.
He still has the same creepy single Mickey Mouse/Michael Jackson glove profile picture on his chat app and occasionally messages me, but I moved away from his area long ago.
Cool dude. Yeah, i've charmed people and brough them right in to fuck them while telling them that if I were a serial killer they'd be in deep trouble, that's how I met my LSE friend long ago.I didn’t know that you identified with having such traits, but I could imagine it I guess.
You remind me a lot of an IEE guy I met (the only one IEE I went as far as to be romantic with a bit, although I did go on a date with another one who turned out to be way more out there crazy), and I once went to his place and it reminded me of Serial Experiments Lain’s room if you’ve ever seen that anime. It was literally like this
In one room, except spanning an entire room instead of just one wall, and his entire flat was dark/creepy dungeon-esque. It was possible he bought/sold computer parts as a hobby side job, although I remember he told me he was a nurse.
He still has the same creepy single Mickey Mouse/Michael Jackson glove profile picture on his chat app and occasionally messages me, but I moved away from his area long ago.
Looks like my personal room. Only mine is stuffed with mostly cassette decks ;-)
“I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.” --- Pippi Longstocking
Lmao I’m messaging him now @Aaron Something , why not.
Sex with possible serial killer IEE's is something people shouldn't miss.
Lmao. No offense but I actually subjectively found the sex to be the worst I’ve ever had (along with my EII ex). We had also been drinking earlier on tbf but he just went at it like a jackhammer while constantly asking me if I was feeling ok and not being hurt. I mean I guess it’s technically “caring” in a way lol, he was a nice guy too, but just not my thing personally. Some would probably have liked it but I prefer a more active role and to not be asked things repeatedly during sex. Still I thought he was cute and I enjoyed chatting with him.
Yeah, subjective stuff happens. I don't like asking much for some reason unless I feel the other person is quite not okay.
You prefer a more active role regarding your partners or yourself?
I personally, as a childlike type, like to do stuff with more active partners who also have some sense of care towards me. Women who like riding me are a 10/10.
Until I get bored and want to do it all myself, then I plumet them onto the bed.
enthusiastic consent is the new sexy
i think I felt it was awkward too if the asker (me or them) was acting odd while asking. the asking is good.
it's good 4 us to confidently ask each other.
Are duals really even ideal? What about mirrors?
Mirror is pretty bad. Identical is better.
Sweet eSu Bee Bee Dee eSu,
Technically, I've lived more time with IEI-Fe than with IEE.
I think living with each type is different. But if you want to know why living with your dual is special, I think it depends on each dual couple because what's special or important for me is probably different for another person/type.
Then, whats different? Valued IEs and dimensionality.
I need to use more Si and Te with IEE and IEE actually ask for it and appreciate it and needs it. Also that with other types my relations became static or somehow stagnated and with IEE things seem to be constantly refreshing and changing. I suppose this doesn't feel the same for all dual couples as I said, mb I feel like this because of Ne. IEE is always thinking in ways of getting more money or starting new projects. That requires Te. Also is in constant need of someone to take care of his Si. I feel motivated to do Si related things because of him, because he actually needs/likes it.
For example IEI-Fe attempts to supply and shun my Si with IEI's Si Role (I do the same with Ni, I guess), and we actually feel offended by each other Creative Element (if the IEI is Ni subtype I think this takes longer to appear). Escalating until we both became mean to each other. With the rest of the types irl, I don't feel like its christmas so I become outwardly detached like a broken toy.
Last edited by Hope; 06-07-2020 at 11:30 PM.
So I've been dating a dual for just under a year and we moved in together due to lockdown (which started end of March for us).
*picture removed*
We're pretty much in the worst conditions for living together because it's sooner than we would have liked to move in together, we live in his STUDIO flat and we obviously haven't really been seeing anyone else or going anywhere else. It's basically a recipe for relationship disaster.
Despite that it's definitely the nicest living arrangement I've had with someone else. My actual flat mate is ESI and she's fine but our lives are too different so we have just ended up in cordiality. My worst living experience was with an LIE, some of which was NTR, some was victim/pseudo-victim mismatch and some IE mismatch. I also dated an LSE and an SEE and spent a lot of time round their houses obviously. The situation with SEE was much more combative and we found it harder to come to resolutions. LSE was very similar to LSI but just.. wrong. Some of the same characteristics I admire in LSI I HATED in LSE.
LSI feels very natural and has done since the beginning. By temperament we're completely different. But despite this and the fact we grew up in different countries we have almost identical life stories. The themes are the same even if the details are different.
On good stuff, he brings a lot of joyful, humble routine to my life. I asked him yesterday what he wanted to do for his birthday and he said "coffee, blowjob and X-files." I thought it was boring since we do at least 2/3 of those everyday anyway but I realised afterwards that this just means he's living his dream life everyday. On the other hand, I am constantly striving for something. So he forces me to slow down, take walks and actually enjoy my coffee rather than just drink it whilst working. He's actually better at self-development than me though because he actually has follow through. He set himself a goal of going to university and he's been studying everyday. He took a 22 day push up challenge from youtube and ACTUALLY did it. I find it inspiring to be around someone like that. I'm also a lot tamer now than I was a year ago because of his influence.
For my part, I'm usually the one who notices if something is unsaid or not right in the relationship and can actually do something about it. He also was overwhelmed at the idea having too many choices for the future. One day I cornered him and made him think about it, then explained which of his options was best for his desires. This led to him deciding to go to University and like I said, he's now studying harder than I ever have. He needed me to narrow down the options and suggest a path but then he's the one who can actually follow through. I think that's the clearest example I have of someone responding to my type-based strengths.
There are plenty of issues but we seem to be able to resolve them quickly and end up better for having the argument, which is not something I can say about the SEE or LSE I dated
Last edited by SaveYourself; 06-10-2020 at 06:27 AM.
"I take back like half of the exclamation points.....they make me look....eager to please. Which I AM....but I don't want anyone to KNOW that"
- Carrie Fisher
I read the blowjob part over and over again, i'm now hornySo I've been dating a dual for just under a year and we moved in together due to lockdown (which started end of March for us).
pic for verification under spoiler but please remove if quotes - I'll remove by tomorrow!
We're pretty much in the worst conditions for living together because it's sooner than we would have liked to move in together, we live in his STUDIO flat and we obviously haven't really been seeing anyone else or going anywhere else. It's basically a recipe for relationship disaster.
Despite that it's definitely the nicest living arrangement I've had with someone else. My actual flat mate is ESI and she's fine but our lives are too different so we have just ended up in cordiality. My worst living experience was with an LIE, some of which was NTR, some was victim/pseudo-victim mismatch and some IE mismatch. I also dated an LSE and an SEE and spent a lot of time round their houses obviously. The situation with SEE was much more combative and we found it harder to come to resolutions. LSE was very similar to LSI but just.. wrong. Some of the same characteristics I admire in LSI I HATED in LSE.
LSI feels very natural and has done since the beginning. By temperament we're completely different. But despite this and the fact we grew up in different countries we have almost identical life stories. The themes are the same even if the details are different.
On good stuff, he brings a lot of joyful, humble routine to my life. I asked him yesterday what he wanted to do for his birthday and he said "coffee, blowjob and X-files." I thought it was boring since we do at least 2/3 of those everyday anyway but I realised afterwards that this just means he's living his dream life everyday. On the other hand, I am constantly striving for something. So he forces me to slow down, take walks and actually enjoy my coffee rather than just drink it whilst working. He's actually better at self-development than me though because he actually has follow through. He set himself a goal of going to university and he's been studying everyday. He took a 22 day push up challenge from youtube and ACTUALLY did it. I find it inspiring to be around someone like that. I'm also a lot tamer now than I was a year ago because of his influence.
For my part, I'm usually the one who notices if something is unsaid or not right in the relationship and can actually do something about it. He also was overwhelmed at the idea having too many choices for the future. One day I cornered him and made him think about it, then explained which of his options was best for his desires. This led to him deciding to go to University and like I said, he's now studying harder than I ever have. He needed me to narrow down the options and suggest a path but then he's the one who can actually follow through. I think that's the clearest example I have of someone responding to my type-based strengths.
There are plenty of issues but we seem to be able to resolve them quickly and end up better for having the argument, which is not something I can say about the SEE or LSE I dated
Last edited by Dr PissBender; 06-09-2020 at 06:46 AM.
I liked @mrrrmaid’s EIE candidness. As an LIE, I totally understand that.
But @Aaron Something, as an IEE, shouldn’t you be getting horny to Disney movies?
I don't know. Does your dick even get up, Mr. Robot?
I also think the strengths of dual compensate his/her weaknesses so it keeps things working somehow. It doesn't happen with less favored ITRs. But is definitely a wrong understanding when ppl think dual has no weaknesses at all or idealize duality.
I wanna have sex with @Adam Strange and @NightHawk. I'm your benefactor, therefore you might call me "daddy".
mods please delete this
i ship it
I've had poor luck with Benefactors, @Aaron Something. And "daddy" is not what I call them.
^this made me laugh a lot. Thank you @Adam Strange
Y'all have a sucky sense of humour.
You can call me daddy. I'm a top
Oh well. Why not?
Yours was funny enough, but Adam’s response to it was funnier
I don't think that's the reason
Now this is how you set up a raunchy joke and punchline...
What if you mistype both yourself and your partnerand you guys get along despite that?
That'd be too gay and leave no point in checking this theory. I am into socionics to have more reasons to hate people.What if you mistype both yourself and your partner
I don't think socionics duality works just by itself. More things have to line up for people to actually like each-other. The similar ppl are in terms of values and perspective the easier it gets. Generally I have a hard time with NF types due to how drastically different our values and perspective on life seems to be.
Yeah, because you're self-typing ILI now and NF's don't happen to be your duals either. And i'm very sure i'm very different in values to different NF's because i'm very much human and have different values.
I'm a stereotypical MBTI INTP, even according to the big 5 test or the Keirsey temperement sorter, idk how that translates to socionics:
Socially Introverted
Emotionally Stable
Critical and Agressive
Impulsive and Disorganized
Open to Experience
Last edited by SGF; 06-09-2020 at 06:42 AM.
@mrrrmaid, I am so happy for you. You guys look so great together.
@mrrrmaid , you really do look beautiful together. Quite happy for you
You guys look good together, definitively a good match!
But that being said, I am starting to wonder if I am crazy, for why do I think that picture is not showing us a Beta Rational dual pair, and why is nobody else coming to the same or a similar conclusion?
Sorry for seriously pissing on your cheese.
“I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.” --- Pippi Longstocking
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