Quote Originally Posted by Taffy View Post
None of that was what I meant, dunno if I came off wrong or if I didn't communicate well.

I didn't touch on boundaries but since you keep mentioning them... Boundaries are very important in shaping healthy relationships, friendships, and views... I agree that they must be defined and asserted since they are vital. I don't think I mentioned anywhere "give up your boundaries and fully submit yourself to the evil scum of the earth". I was simply talking about a grander scale problem of typology communities which is how people take a facet of unhealthy human behavior that most everyone will do at some point in their lives and go "What type/function/quadra does this?". Though I'll admit it's still quite a trivial problem compared to other problems of the world in the first place.

If one had an emotional outburst over a girlfriend cheating on them, it would be understandable to say the least. Someone cheating on another is an ultimate betrayal of trust. I would most likely get emotional too and many other people would, in all fairness.

I agree a lot of emotional states are internal and can be deeply hidden, yes.
Oh now I get it, its about the type 9 thing. e_e it was tongue in cheek, why I put "" there. Idk if you really are 9 or not.

Anyway, the way one identifies a 9 is rather simple, do they avoid conflict internal or external at any cost in order to spare themselves loss and separation?
Ennagram types are not as much personality types as they are coping mechanisms (personal defects) that are so ingrained that they have become a constant feature of said individual. One isn't born a 9 or a 6, one is made into one by life circumstances. Conflict avoidance is the cornerstone of the 9's coping mechanism regardless what irrelevant convoluted type descriptions the Enneagram institute comes up with to describe it.

Unless the 9 is really healthy, they won't assert themselves or god forbid cause a scene, they will just withdraw and avoid both their internal feelings and the external situation.