Results 1 to 13 of 13

Thread: I'm going through rapid-change stress/asperger's HELP!

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Mar 2020
    Posts
    145
    Mentioned
    15 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default I'm going through rapid-change stress/asperger's HELP!

    I have Asperger's and when things go out of routine too quickly, which doesn't take as much a "neurotypical" (person without asperger's) i start to freak out. my entire identity was built around the idea of me being a knowledge bearer to the world but now im not sure if i can finish my college degree and im disillusioned with college life and want to get a programming certificate. i feel like ideals of youth have been lost, where everyone tells me i can do anything i want, but now people tell me just to get by (Im intj in socionics). i keep worrying about what others are thinking, and feel lost. i feel an identity crisis. i feel like i should be an intellectual, but like i cant, and i shouldn't. but let's be honest my gpa is 1.98 but my high idealism led me to believe i could get all 4s afterward and get a 3.0 gpa. ill be honest i feel like i sound spoiled, and i kind of am. a spoiled upper middle class child. but i need to know, who i am. and i need to feel structure. i have always wanted to be a source of light in the world, but i feel like shit. im panicking, its manifesting in physical symptoms.

  2. #2

    Join Date
    Mar 2020
    Posts
    145
    Mentioned
    15 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I also took my morning meds at late afternoon/early evening and evening meds at late at night.

  3. #3

    Join Date
    Mar 2020
    Posts
    145
    Mentioned
    15 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    oh screw it im sticking with university EDIT: or both
    Last edited by Misfit; 05-06-2020 at 05:07 AM.

  4. #4

    Join Date
    Mar 2020
    Posts
    145
    Mentioned
    15 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    it appears like i had a panic attack.

  5. #5
    Number 9 large's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2017
    Location
    Baking bread
    TIM
    ESTp 7w8 Aries Sp/Sx
    Posts
    3,835
    Mentioned
    229 Post(s)
    Tagged
    2 Thread(s)

    Default

    i mean its probably best to follow your heart. if you feel an internal unease with the way your life is going, its probably not going away till you change it.
    ~ ESTP ~ SLE ~ ESTp ~ Self-Pres 7w8 ~ Sp/Sx ~ Fire Element ~ Aries Sign ~ Beta Quadra ~ Gryffindor House ~ Summer Season ~ SLUEN ~

  6. #6
    You're a peach and I'm a plum thegreenfaerie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2019
    Location
    Neptune
    Posts
    2,153
    Mentioned
    93 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Misfit, it's okay if you aren't entirely sure what you want to do career wise. It doesn't make you any less of a person and it doesn't mean you are failing in life. It sounds like what you're saying is that you had an idea of what you should do with your life that centered around your perception of self, but now you've realized maybe you would be better suited doing something else and this messes with your concept of self. I think that as we grow, we do find that some of our interests and passions shift. We start to see how we can apply some of these things in the real world, get a better idea of whether or not we really like it and start to see in what areas our talents and our passions align. It could be that you end up finding something suitable surrounding what you were initially going for, or that you do end up going the programming route instead. Try not to beat yourself up and consider that it is it okay to take your time in figuring this out. People go at different speeds and reach different places in their life at different times. What other people think doesn't matter and chances are many of them aren't even thinking badly about you in regard to all of this. I do understand that your aspbergers makes this more difficult and challenging for you and I wonder if there is someone you can see to work with on how to manage your stress a little better when it comes to dealing with change. I also wonder if you have any supports who you can speak with about your concerns whether it be family, friends, a therapist or a group for others going through similar struggles (such as one for those with aspbergers).
    It's definitely not easy. It can be overwhelming trying to figure out what we want to do with our lives and trying to make a happy and fulfilled life for ourselves. However, I do truly believe it is okay to be unsure and to take a long while in figuring it out.
    I’m neurotypical I guess and I apologize if I don’t make sense, am saying things that aren’t helpful, or just seem like I don’t understand. I don’t know you or your life and what external expectations or pressures you may actually be facing, but I want to tell you as an outsider that I think that where you are at is perfectly okay and normal. Maybe while going throughout your daily life and doing things you enjoy when you have the time, you will start to get more lucid in your thinking on what path you would like to take.
    It’s unreasonable to expect that we should know exactly what we should do right away in our adult life and likely there is more than one thing you could do that would help you feel fulfilled in the career sense. Remember to take care of yourself and if you are feeling burnt out, it’s okay to take a break. I know it’s hard to not care what others may think but try not to focus on it as much. As stated before it’s likely not as bad as you think and it’s important that you are focusing on your health and taking care of yourself. It seems like you care about your future, which is already a step ahead of some, and I think things will work out for you in time. It may not be as quickly as you anticipate (or maybe it will! ��), and it may not look like how you originally pictured it would, but I think it will work out in the end for you.

  7. #7
    Landlord of The Dog and Duck Subteigh's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    TIM
    Enlightened
    Posts
    16,686
    Mentioned
    337 Post(s)
    Tagged
    4 Thread(s)

    Default

    You need to talk with medical professionals, your family, and your university & tutors (both in terms of careers and health advice, but also relating to your degree - they may be able to make accommodations). It won't help to hide things away.

    Your first priority has to be your health. I cannot tell you whether or not you should continue your degree, but I certainly don't think you should stop just so that you can do some course you can do any time - perhaps even this summer.

  8. #8
    You're a peach and I'm a plum thegreenfaerie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2019
    Location
    Neptune
    Posts
    2,153
    Mentioned
    93 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    That's true, at your school potentially being able to make accommodations. I'm actually on leave from a program myself right now. Often times you can take leave for up to a year without losing your place in the program. Not saying it's what you should do, but it's another potential option.

  9. #9
    ouronis's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    TIM
    ref to ptr to self
    Posts
    1,716
    Mentioned
    74 Post(s)
    Tagged
    2 Thread(s)

    Default

    Doubt is normal. Don't give up just because you feel doubt.

  10. #10

    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    MI
    TIM
    IEI-Ni
    Posts
    11,273
    Mentioned
    326 Post(s)
    Tagged
    2 Thread(s)

    Default

    "knowledge bearer to the world" and "source of light to the world" sounds like it would put too much pressure on people. Or it's something narcissistic-ish people say when they really want to eat the audience. (Like Jasmine on Angel or Esther Hicks in my novel)

    Think of it this way, you are already those things to the people you need to be. 'The world' doesn't have to follow suit. You are trying to become something you already are so no wonder you feel torn in half.

    Be easier with yourself. Nobody was made to be a 'light source' unless they are roleplaying a Priest or Paladin as a fantasy. And you are already that way naturally to somebody else I'm sure it doesn't have to be for the 'world', again. =)

  11. #11
    You're a peach and I'm a plum thegreenfaerie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2019
    Location
    Neptune
    Posts
    2,153
    Mentioned
    93 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I may have taken my response to too personal of a place. Misfit, I agree that you should not give up and I definitely think that the sooner in life you can make a good career for yourself, the better. However, do not be too hard on yourself if you need time to figure it all out. Consulting a licensed professional, school advisor and any people in your life you may have that are supportive and trustworthy could all be beneficial to helping you through this. I wish you the best of luck and believe you will get there.

  12. #12

    Join Date
    Mar 2020
    Posts
    145
    Mentioned
    15 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by thegreenfaerie View Post
    I may have taken my response to too personal of a place. Misfit, I agree that you should not give up and I definitely think that the sooner in life you can make a good career for yourself, the better. However, do not be too hard on yourself if you need time to figure it all out. Consulting a licensed professional, school advisor and any people in your life you may have that are supportive and trustworthy could all be beneficial to helping you through this. I wish you the best of luck and believe you will get there.
    thank you so much for your help, youve been a good help

  13. #13

    Join Date
    Mar 2020
    Posts
    145
    Mentioned
    15 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BandD View Post
    "knowledge bearer to the world" and "source of light to the world" sounds like it would put too much pressure on people. Or it's something narcissistic-ish people say when they really want to eat the audience. (Like Jasmine on Angel or Esther Hicks in my novel)

    Think of it this way, you are already those things to the people you need to be. 'The world' doesn't have to follow suit. You are trying to become something you already are so no wonder you feel torn in half.

    Be easier with yourself. Nobody was made to be a 'light source' unless they are roleplaying a Priest or Paladin as a fantasy. And you are already that way naturally to somebody else I'm sure it doesn't have to be for the 'world', again. =)
    thank you, that was really helpful

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •