What's blue and smells like red paint?
Blue paint. :D
Hi. I've tried to do this questionnaire quickly, if it can be called quickly at all. Now that you're here (yay), please read through and give me any opinions on type, or what I express related to it. I'll much appreciate your help, thanks in advance for your time!
What do you look for in friends? In romantic relationships?
Close personal bond, high level of mutual trust where we are free to talk about things close to/important to us (e.g. insecurities, inner worlds, shared interests). Something interesting or deep about their personality/character that makes me want to keep talking and finding out more about them.
I guess I would bond better with someone more proactive (and naturally, extroverted) than me, since it's unnatural for me to constantly push to know someone, and I doubt I'll do that enough to maintain close enough of a bond with them.
I do not think of getting into any romantic relationships.
What conflicts have you encountered recently with other people? Why did they happen? Which kinds seem to happen on a regular basis?
When I am closed off and do not express enough sensitivity. Generally, I'm tired and not in the mood to talk about something serious and/or express concern and sympathise. However I don't know how to tell others that gracefully, and also feel obliged at the same time to be supportive and there for them since they need it. Conflict arises when I slip up somewhere and they get upset at me.
With inaction when I fail to do tasks I'm expected to or agreed to do.
I'd say I don't get into conflicts often though.
In what areas of life can you manage well on your own? In what areas of your life would you like help?
Keeping boundaries/managing psychological distance from others, so I have an idea of where I stand and do not go too far. (rarely getting bullied or taken advantage of) Idk what to say, I've been told I'm good at that :P
Self-confidence, and mobilisation to take right, appropriate action. Or just mobilisation to take action at all.
What traits do you find endearing that others might dislike? What traits are considered positive/neutral by others but tend to annoy you?
In general, quirkiness. In ideas, mannerisms, ways people come across to others. I see it as something individual and unique about them, and appreciate them for being different. Also, some behaviours that may be socially unacceptable, such as overt defiance of authority (e.g. disrespect).
Excessive display of emotion, surface level concern for others. On the other end, proudly being insensitive. Neediness for validation by a group — although I extend my sympathy for such people.
In what situations or times in your life did you feel most fulfilled, and why?
I wouldn't exactly call it fulfilment, but situations in a generous ballpark range of that:
1) Being a known/key figure in online communities
2) Doing well in something I'm proud of, getting validated by other people and myself
3) Offering support to people I'm close to and them feeling better from it, or meaningful interactions as a whole
How do you behave around strangers?
Uncommunicative and inconspicuous, maybe evasive. If they interest me, I'll try to be interesting to them, ask many questions and make observations from unusual perspectives.
How do you react to conflict? What do you do if somebody insults or attacks you?
Become defensive inside, try to continue to discuss on that topic reasonably. I may be angry but hold it inside.
Alternatively, I may start to feel bad for getting into the conflict, or being what the other person accuses me of being in the heat of the moment. I'd want to back down from it and play it down then.
Keep my cool, be defensive again and dismiss their remark. I may return with my own retort, but avoid escalating it too far.
If I see that they are willing to listen, and a positive impact can be gleaned from it, I'll express precisely that I am hurt by their unkind remark. In some situations, it can throw people off guard.
Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it.
Getting stuck in a certain negative state of mind or way of doing things. It's when I keep to defeating old thought patterns, which makes me act in the same ways, and make the same mistakes again. Stagnation and a lack of novelty, driving force for change.
If it gets particularly bad, my mood will be affected, and this pretty much becomes a bad mood situation. Positively: get outside and walk around, write it out to get it out. Talk to someone about it. Negatively: continue to stay stuck in it till it lightens, writing can do this too. So, I don't really have a good solution...
How do you dress or manage your appearance?
Something unassuming and comfortable. I don't mind about appearance, if I'm a little dishevelled, as long as I look okay overall. (Funnily enough, to people who mind, I mind about making it a point that I don't mind.)
What were you like as a child? How have you changed since then?
Very shy and didn't dare to approach or talk to people, so I was alone and didn't have friends for a good chunk of childhood. I've become more assertive, firm and strong in my will and individualistic — gained confidence in standing for my own way and opinion of doing things, even in the face of others if they go against it. To some degree, it taught me to enjoy independence and freedom, and to cherish the people I get to know even more deeply.
Do you like kids? Why or why not?
No. They can be noisy, difficult to deal with. But most of all, they don't have much experience in the world, and are 'unsophisticated' beings in that way.
How do you feel about attention? Do you seek it out?
I enjoy attention in certain contexts, towards myself as a character, and of course areas I'm strong in (or would like to see myself as being strong in). Not really, maybe a few questions to people, but I don't press for it. I'll take delight in it as it comes though ;)
What's been on your mind? Has anything been worrying or concerning you? What problems have you encountered lately?
The extent of my procrastination and lack of action taken to be productive, despite the worsening circumstances I find myself in due to it. I fear it is a kind of spiralling down, to which I have no solution and don't know how to get out of. It's being resolute/unwavering sometimes and wanting to break down other times in the face of bleakness.
I become stuck in my mind with self-defeating thoughts, unable to do anything or express what is wrong, minimally trying to get necessary tasks done.
What do you do if you're not getting what you want? What approach do you use?
Consider where I could have gone wrong. Weigh if it's worth trying to get that in that manner, how important it is, and the difficulties I'll face to get it. If it involves people, try to imagine their point of view, consider what I know of them (personality typology helps). Try again. Step back, look from another perspective and attempt to find another way around it. If my efforts are futile, I may just give up on it and spend my time doing something else.
Are you comfortable taking leadership roles? In what areas? Why or why not?
I'd be more comfortable leading a smaller group of people, don't think I have the influence to lead many. I alternatively also like the role of being a close advisor of sorts to a leader. The attention, responsibility and need to manage uncooperative people can be stressful, and I am more comfortable supporting (from an position of some authority or recognition) from the background.
How often do you get angry? What kinds of things make you angry?
I mostly get angry at myself. I get discouraged by certain thoughts and feelings, so efforts, if I do take them, become ineffectual. Due to this, I get helplessly stuck in the original situation, am unable to function properly (work through life/problems), and get angry at myself. Anger can also stem from the frustration of falling far below an ideal standard that I should be.
Mostly internal influences. I don't often get angry, too strongly or for too long, at external influences.
Your friend bursts into tears. What do you do? How does it make you feel?
I would try to comfort them and offer my support. Ask them questions and listen to their responses. Be present and there for them. However, it would also be a shock and I may be awkward in trying to do this.
At a loss for what to do, share some of their feelings and sympathise with them, a sense of urgency and concern.
What is the purpose of life? What do you find personally meaningful in life?
To create your own purpose in life and live it out. Take action and continually work towards it, to the very best of your ability.
Talking to others about topics beyond surface level ('deep' talks about life, each other), developing my character from pushing through difficulties, engaging in activities I enjoy, creation of something with heartfelt intention, broadening my worldview by exposure to new experiences.
I've suspected that, but never took the suspicion seriously/gave it the consideration it deserves. If you don't mind elaborating, why so?
Originally Posted by Adam Strange
Last edited by wmcbbyld; 03-19-2020 at 05:28 PM.
Reason: forgot to quote
I'll reply at length later today, when I'm not trying to make money. In the meantime, maybe some others can weigh in?
Originally Posted by wmcbbyld
Agree on SLI! Am interested in hearing your explanation though. @Adam Strange