Dating my conflictors
How can I be able to really interact with duals?
So this post is being made basically because I think I have a problem that is not related to Socionics and could be impairing by ability to relate to duals.
The problem is that I think I have spent a great amount of my lifetime developping skills, learning languages and reading about random articles on psychology and neuroscience. So I know a lot of interesting stuff but I don't really can talk about it with complementary types, because it's too far from the types of conversation we usually develop, so I would need to be constantly leading them towards these topics, what isn't very interesting, since I want to have natural conversations, just like my parents have with one another.
I have come to realize this after meeting a girl who always caught my attention with her attitutes and words, and I caught her attention too, but it is usually unexpectedly.
So I started to read a lot recently (1 book every 2 days) so that I can talk to her like someone more mature (because she gives me a feeling of being extremelly mature, she scares me with this, I feel that she is the most mature person I have met in my life).
I also read that watching the news helps people find common ground to talk about, but I find it stupid. I am not like men of my age, that like to talk about politics, sports and cars, different products trending, youtubers, etc
Do I need to be less idealistic and start having fruitless conversations? I don' think so. She has helped me become more attached to the world around me and I wish I could have her as my wife.
I'm not saying she's my dual (even though I feel extrem. safe around her, and I relate to some of the stages of duality, but I'm not sure it's mutual), but she's the only person that catches my interest and I really would appreciate if I found someone with whom I could talk just like my parents do. But maybe I have created this problem myself and now is the time to learn things that are accessible to the mainstream (I'm mean daily life people).
Any tips on which steps to take to achieve this would be really appreciated, because duality is useless if you cant converse (I feel like I am more an entertainer, and I have an easier time with kids)
In resume: Is everyone somewhat mentally prepared (preprogrammed) to interact with their duals, and if not, how can I make it possible?
Last edited by Megatrop; 03-15-2020 at 12:02 AM.
Like many Ijs, you seem to be overthinking it; the relationship that you seem to seek should sync easily without any preparation. Relationships either work or they don't; one can place oneself in proximity of another but can't really "make it possible". There's a saying (don't remember the exact words): One hurdle standing in the way of gaining something valuable is to want it more than anything else.........
Last edited by Rebelondeck; 03-17-2020 at 11:57 AM.
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