What's my type?
I've tried to type myself for too long, I give up . I've found that if I take tests, I almost feel like I can't answer fully truthfully because I automatically think about what type I would be making more likely if I chose a specific answer (and it just messes with my head). I also read a lot about the types and I just feel one thing one day and another some different day (and it also influences my behavior if I think I'm a certain type). What a pain!! Hahaha.
Then I also have read stuff about enneagram, and DCNH subtypes, and instinctual stackings, and it's just all to hard to untangle what aspects of behavior stem from which source. I almost drive myself crazy reading about this stuff, in the sense for example that when I read about the function stacks a while back, I could almost at least think I "simulate" what the functions would be like in my behavior. I almost am starting to think the entire typology idea might just be deeply flawed . Since I've related to different "valued elements" of the different quadras, depending on where I was at the time in my life.
For example, I feel that I've had two extremely close relationships in the past that both seem to me like they would be "duality", though they were with very different people that would almost certainly have different types. I can't even type them either, since my decisions are intricately based off what I think my own type is and what the intertype interaction would be like then. I thought one of them was an IEE, then an LSE, then maybe an ESE or SEI.
I've thought at different times I could be LII, ILE, EIE, IEI, LIE, ILI, EII, IEE, and even sensing types like SEI, ESI, SLI. Most people that know me in real life think I'm introverted and intuitive, at least from an MBTI standpoint which they are aware of. I'm hopeless so going to hope others can fling out a guess if I fill out this questionnaire.
What are your values, and why?
What a hard question. I can't say I ever really think about what specifically they are... probably very basic stuff.
1. To at least approach every person with an open mind and an equal footing. No justification it just seems like it comes from within
2. To not push others boundaries for personal gain once I have a relative idea of what they are for different people. This just seems like simple inborn civility everyone has to an extent
3. To be able to provide for oneself/self-sufficiency/"everyone's chips on the table" sort of thing... basically no freeloading unless you have to and that in such a scenario its tacitly understood that it's a temporary situation
What do you study or do for a living? How did you come to do that? What do you like or dislike about it?
I came from a STEM background so I finished a Bachelor's in Physics and Computer Science. Admittedly I chased the Computer Science degree for the easy $ potential if I wanted to bail on higher ed, Physics I pursued for what I perceived to be back then its purity and difficulty. Nowadays I have very little interest in either topic. Avoided the humanities for reasons of feeling many of the courses offered were BS, and the peers in those classes weren't challenging (snobby... but please forgive me if I tell you it was pretty true at the school I did my bachelor's at). Later went on to grad school in a theoretical CS area, shifted to pure math, then took a hiatus which I've been on for coming on a year where I've just been traveling and visiting family. Burned out, basically. I liked that I felt engaged doing the work, but had a gnawing sense of meaningless, tedium, and that others were more suitable for the specialized fields I was getting into than me.
What else do you do on a daily basis? What are your interests and hobbies? Why do you do them?
Exercise by jogging, but pretty much just to stay healthy and fit. I used to spend some time playing video games with certain friends, though the distance between us has increased in recent years and I don't really play any more. Follow sports casually (college football etc.) but without any real enthusiasm (more to procrastinate). Pretty much the only interests/hobbies I've ever had since I was young and continue to have are delving into STEM sort of topics/reading some light literature (xd :vomit, though in recent years it's shifted almost entirely to older literature, though I still hold some interests in statistics. I like to get around with friends if they're nearby and just hang out. There was a period where I was very physically active, I became a very good rock climber as well as a decent baseball player, although admittedly most of it was just because I felt I should have some non-recluse hobbies and they've kind of died out now .
Describe your relations with family and friends. What do you like and dislike about them?
Always felt like I sort of played the "calm mediator" role in my family, and just the "laid back hang out guy" with friends. My parents fought a lot when I was younger; nowadays, if types exist I think that they actually must be an LSI-EIE dual couple, though there's other aspects of their personalities that cause a lot of friction. Liked my dad more when I was a kid since he was very physically warm and loving, and my mom seemed cold and manipulative. Now that I'm older my dad seems suffocating and manipulative moreso, whereas I enjoy my mom's respect of boundaries and thoughtfulness. I've always shifted between friend groups, though I've had some very close friends (all probably SP temperament) before I had a huge falling out with them. I think I just don't have a good grasp on what makes most people able to maintain long term friendships.
What do you look for in friends? In romantic relationships?
I have very little I need to see in a friend; I like to meet all kinds of people. Though I can't stand people who are snobs/too heavy on the gossip for very long. I've made friends with pretty much all sorts of people throughout my life. In romance I want to find someone who's tacitly loyal without being jealous, someone who can have fun and laugh at little things (I can be friends with serious cold types, or sarcastic people, but I don't like it in my romantic relationships, I'm pretty innocent there).
What conflicts have you encountered recently with other people? Why did they happen? Which kinds seem to happen on a regular basis?
In the past, I've had huge falling outs with friend groups, usually because I started to feel they were sucking up my time, in a sense. So I lowered the amount of time I spent with those groups, which they often reacted to with jealousy/aggression/anger and accused me of thinking I was better than them. I honestly didn't, I often just felt bored of doing some of the rituals or activities or gossip in those groups when it (to me) started to feel gross and incestuous, for lack of better word to explain it. I find that sort of behavior pretty common in online forums as well too, so I might not be well received here. LOL. To reiterate though, I don't feel above anyone, I just get bored of things and adjust my time accordingly, which seems to cause problems with certain relationships (though not others). In general, I'd also say my pretty extreme need for independence makes others have to adjust for that around me if there ends up being some sort of relationship there.
How would your friends describe you?
Upbeat, intelligent, can be the "life of the party", considerate, dynamic, clumsy, quiet, messy, curt, funny, crazy, unique are some terms I've got from friends or just acquaintances. On the other hand there are certain kinds of people that seem to clash with me hard, but they just generally tend to avoid me and snipe from a distance, so I basically don't interact with them at all.
What do people generally see as your strengths? What do you like about yourself?
Energetic, optimistic, intelligent, creative.
I don't really reflect on what I like about myself, though I guess it's those things that others see in me. I've told that to some people before though and they snarl and think I lie. I wouldn't say I'm that self-reflective.
What are your weaknesses? What criticism do you often face from others? What do you dislike about yourself?
Sort of reiterating what was up there. Can be messy, too independent, non-open to talk about my personal feelings. Have gotten criticism for not being more thoughtful in certain situations, or that my mind seems to be elsewhere. I don't really dislike anything about myself, sort of in the same sense as the last question; I wouldn't say I'm that self-reflective (or brooding) and consider my weaknesses things to work on but that come with my strengths as a package. Again, there seems to be a certain type of person that finds that unbelievable/naive.
In what areas of life can you manage well on your own? In what areas of your life would you like help?
I would say I'm pretty self-sufficient in general. So definitely in areas of finding ways I enjoy cultivating myself, making enough in terms of finances, taking care of my health. Though I do get messy, and I'm not the best at coordinating people-centric things and whatever. I had a lovely girlfriend in the past who sort of took care of those aspects as well as some of the nicer things in life, such as making a photobook with our memories together, and organizing friend activites. On the other hand she found me interesting, funny, and kind to her. I still think about her, though life took us different ways. She went to pursue her creative career in a distant location.
What things do you dislike doing? What things do you enjoy more than others?
Can't do repetitive and stereotypically "boring" tasks for very long, though I can do them pretty well and efficiently if I try. Don't like spending time with those where the feeling is mutual dislike. Enjoy things that I basically put in hobbies, mostly more intellectually stimulating stuff, though it's kind of embarrassing and cringey to put it that way.
What goals, aspirations, or plans do you have for the future? How did you come to have them?
Figuring them out! I'm stuck! I have a finely tuned internal meter on what careers/crafts I consider to be bullshit, versus those that are honourable, though it'd be pretty bad to share that. Trying to find something that makes me feel like I'm making something I consider good with my professional career, though also balancing financial concerns and considering any beneficial fallout that comes to others around me.
If you had enough money to live comfortably for the rest of your life without working, what would you do with your time?
Honestly just continue my hobbies, which I find great solace in, so intellectual pursuits and do more reading. Would be able to travel though, so I would travel to a lot of places, certain places in Europe etc. Would wish to meet masters of different crafts if it was possible.
What traits do you find endearing that others might dislike? What traits are considered positive/neutral by others but tend to annoy you?
I find it pretty endearing for someone to be what others might call "naive". In the sense that I think openness, ability to laugh at oneself, ability to mess up, make crude but not dark jokes at times are really endearing and lighten up my days. I find certain sorts of wittiness in general annoying (though it REALLY depends here, even in public intellectuals there seems to be a clear split to me those whose humor I find hilarious and those who are meh/gross); if i get a nasty type vibe from someone it pretty much instantly bores me/turns me off. I can't stand big gossipers for very long, I just feel nothing of "real" (obviously subjective) value is being added. Though the flipside is these qualities are often called sophistication, depth, good conversationalism, personal flair.
What kinds of things do you do to manage and/or beautify your environment (your room, your house, etc.)? What do you think of daily chores?
I'm afraid this has gotten horribly long so I'll answer short now. I like house plants, good food, good lighting, I like to mix it up and generally don't care about modern fads. Chores I have to do, I do them efficiently and fast.
How do you behave around strangers?
Seems obviously extremely situation dependent. I try to start a conversation, be considerate, and upbeat if it fits.
How do you react to conflict? What do you do if somebody insults or attacks you?
Try to get to a solution, figure out what will work to solve it. Distance myself as a last resort. I can take insults if I see where they are coming from, and try to compromise. If it's just pure negativity, I cut them out if there's no compromise. Obviously I need independence in my work because of this, which hasn't been a problem really though.
What is one common misconception that people have about things? Explain why it is wrong.
Hmm. Don't think this is necessarily a common misconception, but just that I feel people in general are pretty horrible at giving advice, and that it's too easy to forget others are real too (applying your worldview on everyone). I find honed and practiced heuristics in actions, ethics, and rituals infinitely more illuminating than advice.
What did you do last Friday?
Out for dinner with a former colleague at a Turkish place.
If you are doing a video you can stop here or choose from the rest of the questions as you like.
If you are answering in writing, please answer ALL questions.
What is your biggest accomplishment?
Probably some formal discoveries in my professional career. I don't find them that rewarding/honourable. Still considering my next step in life.
What is something you regret?
No regrets! Except maybe, to not have asserted myself and defended my boundaries more when I was younger. Maybe to have tried harder to make it work with a past girlfriend.
Who do you admire, and why?
So, so many people. Too hard to explain, even just a simple person I can say a lot about. I would say in general I find many of those who live simple, non-public lives very admirable; many in the visible public sphere, not so much.
What's been on your mind? Has anything been worrying or concerning you? What problems have you encountered lately?
Figuring out my next step in life.
What are your religious or spiritual beliefs and why do you hold them?
Don't officially subscribe to a belief system, but wouldn't say I am not spiritual. Have a lot of faith in certain cultural familial rituals, having to do with food, good life events, or deaths in the family. Consider myself in line with a lot of Eastern Orthodox Christian teachings, fond of the ideas behind theosis. Fond of the sort of durable, grateful but 'kvetching' attitude in many Jewish circles, and have many close Jewish friends.
What are your political beliefs, and why? To what extent do you care about politics?
Pretty extreme views on politics, if I was running for office, but pretty common views I believe for those that don't care (most individuals in my experience). I have great faith in humans to resolve their own problems on their own, as long as systems are kept dynamic. Distrust of centralized power, institutions. I believe in the family unit and network, localist governance, practiced and honed civil law on the local level.
Would you ever be interested in starting a business? Why or why not? What role would you play in it? What kind of business would it be?
Maybe a restaurant. Something that I believe would be honourable. I would want to interface with buyers and work with the product; would have to not compromise for financial concerns, so really this is not a viable path for me.
What kind of work environment do you prefer? What do you look for in a job?
Something dynamic, intellectually interesting, judicious, and that you can hone over time and be proud of.
What is or was your favorite school subject and why?
Loved manipulating numbers or drawing up mock election scenarios since I was very young. But also loved fantasy literature, read the whole LOTR series and loved to imagine the landscapes etc. Long division by 4 or 5, excelled in quantitative subjects etc., great memory propelled me through primary school alone. Favorite subject probably went from botany->biology->chemistry->physics->pure math (did algebraic geometry for a long time)->statistics->philosophy->literature/general statistics and control theory.
How do you approach responsibility? What do you tend to expect of others?
Open mind, to approach others gratefully and find their way of life so I can treat it with respect. To not be scum to others in a way I wouldn't like, so try to expect as little as possible.
Where did you go on your most recent vacation? What did you do there? How did you like it and why?
Greece, Lebanon, and Syria. Visited family, had great food and conversations, learned local histories and events. Was great.
What were you like as a kid? How have you changed since you were a child?
More intense as a kid, I guess. I imagine pretty much the same but hopefully I have smoothed out some of the hard edges a little .
What was your high school experience like?
Leader of my social friend group, excelled in academics, was top or second of the class. Pride did get to me a little.
Talk about a significant event from your life.
Too long to answer.
Do you like kids? Why or why not?
In general yes... Do I like people? In general, yes.
If you were to raise a child, what would be your main concerns, what measures would you take, and why?
Too long to answer.
Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it.
Yes, if my independence is threatened in general I guess.
How do you see other people as a whole? What do you consider a prevalent social problem? Name one.
Too long to answer.
What do you do if you're not getting what you want? What approach do you use?
Are you comfortable taking leadership roles? In what areas? Why or why not?
In general, yes. If it sucks up too much of my time, no.
How often do you get angry? What kinds of things make you angry?
Angry in a small, life-invigorating way: often. Seriously angry: not often.
What is the best thing that happened to you during the past week?
What is the worst thing that happened to you during the past week?
What is the purpose of life? What do you find personally meaningful in life?
Ridiculous question IMO.
What is the most interesting place you have been, and why?
Lebanon, Northern Israel, Southwestern Syria.
How do you dress or manage your appearance?
Simple, well, with some surprises sometimes!
Do you like surprises?