Last edited by bye; 11-27-2020 at 04:52 PM.
Can IEI's push out babies?
MOTTO: NEVER TRUST IN REALITY
Winning is for losers
Life is a joke but do you have a life?
Headstrong, but I respect the sheer mass of nutsack in this post. You will be a great man, Vik. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
I've yet to meet a truly traditional IEI female, but writing them off entirely might not be necessary. Sometimes what the system says is a positive IR may have good compatibility of views/attitudes, but lack chemistry/attraction. Sometimes people with ostensibly great chemistry lack the compatibility necessary for longevity (and having so many children indeed requires the utmost longevity). There is more to human relations than Socionics can capture. Don't rely on duality to fulfill your innermost ideals, as, with prudence, your will shall find it's way to the best options.
In terms of positive IRs that may be more willing to be traditional mothers, SEI (your mirage) and LSI (your mirror) may be decent options, IR wise, for you (though some authors claim LSI can be quite married to their career/prospects, and resent having to part with them). That said, ILI is also not generally associated with being a stay-at-home Mother, but I've lucked out in that regard, so perhaps IEI can come through for you as well.
Either way, if you make yourself such an attractive suitor, finding a decent woman should be far less difficult - the issue will then become which of them gives you their loyalty and loves you for you, and which of them are opportunistically after a convenient suitor. Your ideal requires extreme discernment if you want that large family to stand the test of time, and the state of 'dating' has never been more shallow and dehumanizing. Be cautious, and don't settle for less than the best, man.
OK, time to get out the statistics.
I know about nine IEI's IRL; six females and three males.
1. 0 kids, married to an LSE.
2. 0 kids, married to an ???
3. 2 kids, married to an LSE then divorced.
1. 1 kid, gave the baby away. Married a different guy, an IEI, then divorced him.
2. 2 kids, married to an SEE.
3. 0 kids, married to an ??? and then divorced. Now with an IEI.
4. 2 kids, married to an SLE.
5. 2 kids, married to an ILE then divorced, one kid is trans.
6. 0 kids, divorced, now has an SLE BF.
What do you define as "traditional" as it pertains to what you seek in a mate? Would you expect for your wife to essentially take on the lion's share of the child rearing in the "S" sense (attending to their health and physical concerns, cleaning, cooking, driving them around, etc...)? If so, and you're hellbent on the 7 kids, I'd say find an SEI and call it a day. If MBTI statistics are to be trusted (and I believe they are), there aren't enough IEIs for every SLE, anyway, whereas SEIs are fairly common and therefore more easily accessible.
I know several SLEs, 2 of whom are married to IEIs with no more than 3 children each, and it's definitely the SLEs who are rather remarkably hands-on and involved (as far as "S" matters) in the rearing of the children. They work 50+ hours a week AND somehow find the time and energy to coach their kids' games, go on a fuckton of Se adventures, enforce the IEIs' disciplinarian values, cook dinner when necessary or for the fun of it, and do all that shit--the miracles of 4D Se. If anything, the IEIs are the "heart" of the family unit and attend to everyone's "higher" needs. But I honestly don't believe that any intuitive type, and damn sure not the introverted breed, are built to actively take on the "S" concerns of a pack of giant babies. If you can find a IEI willing to comply with that, then at the very least, you better be willing to supply S support, whether that be you, yourself, or with hired or out sourced help.
you could still pay a housekeeper to take care of the house (if you are that rich as you say you'll be) and marry whoever you want.
Viktor, I have two thoughts on this.
One, IEI's like SLE's because they are so simple, emotionally, and it is refreshing to them to find a guy who just says and does what he wants, without a lot of machiavellian double-think going on. And who appreciates faithfulness for what it is.
So they like SLE's because they bring clarity to their lives, and SLE's actually get things done, which IEI's just dream about doing.
Two, I share your desire to be able to earn enough so the woman doesn't have to work (outside the house), but let me say, as a guy who was a househusband and raised one kid, that that was harder work than any job I've ever had. So stay-at-home mothers work. They work really hard.
“I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.” --- Pippi Longstocking
I'm not sure if you're serious or if you're just trolling but I'll take it as if you were serious because I have nothing better to do right now.
See the good thing about your duals is that their Fi dem allows them to understand other people's emotions almost subconsciously even without any clear emotional demonstration. You can honestly let go of your fear of not being able to give emotionally. Everybody gives emotionally, always. Some are just less obvious and more insecure about it.
And quite frankly, when I read all your posts and threads about finding the perfect woman I actually find you both vulnerable and emotional. Maybe you should work on bringing this openness that you have online in your real life.
You don't have to find the perfect woman in order to build the perfect relationship. Really you don't even need the perfect relationship in order to be happy. Finding an IEI woman for you to date and create a genuine connection with seems to be already complicated enough. Maybe you should focus on that challenge for now instead of planning out the life of a woman you haven't even met yet.
Duals are supposed to provide us with the stuff we don’t know we want and need. My point is that if you’re seeking a dual, be aware that a significant part of their purpose is for them to “change” you to some degree, ideally in the sense of providing greater balance, which may result in a significant shift in priorities. Perhaps the IEI convinces you that instead of 7 kids and a rather lively home environment (where, in part, due to the greater potential for home instability and neglect there might be a few duds/social drains that negate the net benefit of the better adjusted ones lol), you have 3 "finely crafted” kids (with a lot more care and attention from parents who balance each other well and have created a more stable environment) who may be more well adjusted and therefore have better chances at "greatness," which might then lead to a more enduring “dynasty,” influence and legacy for your name and family. IEI would be concerned with making the roll out (over time) of your overarching goal/vision more successful and achievable VS. SEI who would be more concerned with and better equipped at providing the necessary physical/emotional support for your kids in the hear and now. Depends on what's more important to you.
When the lust subsides, rethink the 7 kids plan @Viktor. You want to impregnate every woman on earth in, uh, certain moods.
“My typology is . . . not in any sense to stick labels on people at first sight. It is not a physiognomy and not an anthropological system, but a critical psychology dealing with the organization and delimitation of psychic processes that can be shown to be typical.” —C.G. Jung
I have met people who said they wanted at least 10 kids, then had one and were less sure about a second one. I also know that the burden put on the oldest the help care for the yougest can be pretty bad for them because of the amount of extra responsabilities which can also lead to ressentment, and bad for the yougest, because they are cared for by children and not adults.
Your legacy is in all of your interactions, small or big, and will last far beyond what anyone can remember. How many of your ancestors do you recall, even in stories? maybe up to great-grand-parents, or a bit more than that. It's rare to have a well recorded family history, we aren't all the queen of england. It happens that people keep old pictures, it happens they dump them, it happens they give them away to places that keep historical reccords. What I mean is in 100-200, your concrete legacy will be fading into time, even geneticaly, it is how life is, even if you have a family that is studied in history classes, it fades and becomes distant quick.
You also have no control over your children's want of having children... my grandma is being a dick about the need of me having kids currently, yuk. What I want or not doesn't even matter and it's really straining the relationship.
Metal is great and I wish you success in your endeavors, also meaningfulness in your life.
IME with str8 female IEIs they want to have kids and do- but they are more hands offy with their parenting and they sadly seem to end up more unhealthily fixated on a manipulative extroverted asshole that they can't ever really have. The more life of the party guy that goes through multiple women.
"bnd, isn't that like sooo hypocritical of you"
Not really. Because yea while both gay male/str8 female IEIs will do a Tex Avery wildtake when a hot tattooed SLE Chad with a criminal record walks in the room, ime IEI str8 females especially have it really bad in this regard, like driving almost every night by their house at 3 am and stalking them and falling way too much in love with the guy. And they seem really bad at separating fantasy from reality when they are too deeply in love. And not getting over personal grudges when the guy won't be more family man like or sacrifice more of his playboy lifestyle for her. Because I think the IEI women do want a more traditional life and stability, but they feel kind of incapable of creating that themselves in a way.
I'm not saying gay men are better 'in general'- but at least we tend to know that it's just hot sex and not something to really emotionally invest in. (I did see a hot 6 foot 6 guy at Target I wanted to fuck today lol)
IEI str8 females get all weirdly emotionally attracted so deeply IN ADDITION to being so physically turned on, and they can be wrecks in this area. SLE males also can be really nice to everybody (despite Fi polr cuz FI polr is a lot deeper than that.) and I think this can confuse IEIs of all stripes because IEIs are victim types and we can be used to being bullied or feeling made fun of- and maybe we are confusing somebody being nice and charming with us for something else.
This maybe how the duality works tho- 'cuz even if I like somebody I realistically need a lot of space and SLEs tend to give me that because they just want to do more extroverted party-ish things and rob banks and be porn star bad asses - more than they want to hang around my boring introverted nerdy ass.
Sorry about before. I didn't mean to imply ALL women in the world campily acted this way around men or anything lol but yeah, its quite obvious with IEI women lol. I think realistically, IEI/SLE couples might need coaching from deltas on how to be more normal and healthy or something. And to stop confusing infatuation with love. But yeah if you are Beta, acting too PC and delta News reporter ish is most likely going to be ... a really boner killer so idk.
How would a Delta convince them that what is described here is NOT true love, but a dysfunctional relationship?Sometimes I hate every single stupid word you say
Sometimes I wanna slap you in your whole face (whoa oh oh)
There's no one quite like you, you push all my buttons down
I know life would suck without you (whoa oh oh)
At the same time, I wanna hug you
I wanna wrap my hands around your neck
You're an asshole but I love you
And you make me so mad, I ask myself
Why I'm still here, or where could I go
You're the only love I've ever known
But I hate you, I really hate you[
So much I think it must be
True love, true love
“I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.” --- Pippi Longstocking
Where I come from I would mostly see large families (think more than 4 kids) on church leaflets. They seemed calm, trusting, solidary people. That's when I was a kid, so I assume they did not have access to the internet. I don't know how the internet may have changed the ways of large families but I assume that if the parents understand the basics of what makes for a loving family, then things are pretty much the same. If you feel like having a large family, maybe you want to check out large families? Maybe there are festivals where big families meet or something and it would be a good venue for meeting someone. Also, if you are OK with having a wife who does not speak swedish, maybe you can check out other continents so that you can raise your children on euro money out of europe #finalstageofglobalizationetc.
Another idea would be to check out places like orphanages some sort of family-assistance venues which may attract females with a giving and family-oriented temperament who might as well be fertile
Last edited by Kalinoche buenanoche; 12-22-2019 at 01:45 PM.
Spread your mighty SLE seed all across the world, Vicky.
Personally, I'm with you on wanting to raise only my own genetic offspring.
regardless of your sociotype, if you want a lot of kids you better start now, dude. like this winter.
I want step kids
> So basically, I have this idea that female IEIs aren't really family types.
the problem is that IEI are not _your family_ types. at least, not the best one
for example, you are clowning too much for T types
The interpretation of what Viktor said, and jumping to conclusions (without all the information you'd need) highly depends on your already existing viewpoint concerning the topic.
Last edited by Asenath; 04-19-2020 at 11:10 PM.
I want to knowif you know
how to melt into that fierce heat of living
the center of your longing
2 would be nice, more if my partner wants to. Not female tho.
Its not easy to find women however who want family these days. Idk what happened, ppl prefer to just enjoy themselves / hedonism instead of engaging in something meaningful such as having offspring.
e_e the IEI ex gf I almost married is 34 now, still no kids, plans not to have any. I broke up with her anticipating this would happen. Said something about kids being parasites last time we talked... -.- good riddance.