ESI/LIE Conversations

[Adam Strange]

Since gamma doesn't have a lounge I don't know where to ask this.

I was reading a ITR descprition and saw this. Help me make sense out of this sentence.

"ESI's love is not a burden only for the LIE because due to the "specialization of his sociotype" the LIE remains at large distances away from it, and needs this kind of love precisely at such a distance."

Does that mean physical distance for the LIE or psychological distance. Like do they stay away from ESI or is it saying their Fi strength is at a greater distance and requires a stronger Fi to fill the gap?

@Lord Pixel, I just realized that I have a better explanation for the quotation above that you found.

Normally, I'm engaged in highly rational Te activities and I'm not considering Fi human relations much at all. This means that I can go out and explore and influence the world in my limited way without needing too much in the way of deeply personal human interactions.

However, just because I don't need much in the way of human interactions on an intimate level, does not mean that I don't need ANY human interactions. I actually do need to know that I am loved in a deeply personal way by someone.

Stratiyevskaya said it very well:

"Going out on a long journey or venturing on a risky venture, the LIE must feel assured that his "rear flank" is covered and that he has a "warm home" to return to - a place where someone is waiting for him and where he needs to return. For LIE it is very important to realize that he is very needed and dear to somebody, that his life is very valuable and significant, that there is somebody out there who loves him, who cares and waits for him. If there is nobody like this, the risks that the LIE takes on diminish in their value - his life and his work become meaningless. In accordance with the system of values ​​of the third quadra and of his dual dyad, the LIE risks himself for the success and well-being of his "team."

His "team" is a specific group of people with whom he is associated by strong tries and reliable relations. For the sake of friendship, love, respect and peace of these people the LIE is ready to take on any load, both physical and psychological, to endure thought any tests, to go for any risks and sacrifices - but it all makes sense only if this is needed by somebody."

As she stated, I can go out and do things in the real world without much in the way of human support, but I have to know that someone is available who cares about me.

With my LSI GF, we'd not talk much during the week, and then we'd spend the weekend together, doing things that were either maintenance or just plain fun. We'd go camping, visit museums, walk in the woods, go swimming in a local lake, go on mini-trips to nearby interesting places, go to sports events, or sometimes we'd work on repairs to her home or car or do yard maintenance. Being with her in these times was easy and fun, with only a little of the gear-grinding that Mirage produces.

In her case, I think she got a kick out of deciding what she wanted to do and then getting me to do it. Aside from the fun of going on trips, she also got her house and car repaired. Her life opened up tremendously as a result of our interactions. In my case, doing all this stuff was just a continuation of my regular life, so it was falling-down easy for me to do, and what I got in return was the knowledge that she loved me.

Now, she only had Role Fi, but to a starving man, bread and water are a feast.

I actually think that LSE's and LIE's are damaged or undeveloped in a particular way, in the sense that we have what is called one dimensional Fi, but is what I think of as retarded Fi. I actually think that Te-doms are stuck in an early development stage of children where, for example, the mother takes the little kid to the playground and he runs off to explore, and then stops, turns around, runs back to his mother to make sure that she's still there for him, and once reassured, goes off again to explore, his mother temporarily forgotten until the "love assurance" runs out and he has to return to her again.

Certainly, I've seen an LSE call home from work several times a day to check on his wife and ask her what she's doing and does she need anything. It is really the LSE who needs to know where his wife is, and he's the one who needs something from her. He needs her steady and reassuring existence. In return, he'll pick up dinner on the way home, pay for the house, and fix the toaster when he gets there. Because he can.

In my own case, I think I need to close the distance between me and my SO and be intimate for a while, until the "love meter" reads "full", and then I can go off and do things independently, working only with my Te and Ni, until the supply of love runs out and I need to return to fill it up again. But I need to know that she is nearby and is available when I need her. That is essential. I need that like oxygen.

[Lord Pixel]

@Lord Pixel, I just realized that I have a better explanation for the quotation above that you found.

Normally, I'm engaged in highly rational Te activities and I'm not considering Fi human relations much at all. This means that I can go out and explore and influence the world in my limited way without needing too much in the way of deeply personal human interactions.

However, just because I don't need much in the way of human interactions on an intimate level, does not mean that I don't need ANY human interactions. I actually do need to know that I am loved in a deeply personal way by someone.

Stratiyevskaya said it very well:

"Going out on a long journey or venturing on a risky venture, the LIE must feel assured that his "rear flank" is covered and that he has a "warm home" to return to - a place where someone is waiting for him and where he needs to return. For LIE it is very important to realize that he is very needed and dear to somebody, that his life is very valuable and significant, that there is somebody out there who loves him, who cares and waits for him. If there is nobody like this, the risks that the LIE takes on diminish in their value - his life and his work become meaningless. In accordance with the system of values ​​of the third quadra and of his dual dyad, the LIE risks himself for the success and well-being of his "team."

His "team" is a specific group of people with whom he is associated by strong tries and reliable relations. For the sake of friendship, love, respect and peace of these people the LIE is ready to take on any load, both physical and psychological, to endure thought any tests, to go for any risks and sacrifices - but it all makes sense only if this is needed by somebody."

As she stated, I can go out and do things in the real world without much in the way of human support, but I have to know that someone is available who cares about me.

With my LSI GF, we'd not talk much during the week, and then we'd spend the weekend together, doing things that were either maintenance or just plain fun. We'd go camping, visit museums, walk in the woods, go swimming in a local lake, go on mini-trips to nearby interesting places, go to sports events, or sometimes we'd work on repairs to her home or car or do yard maintenance. Being with her in these times was easy and fun, with only a little of the gear-grinding that Mirage produces.

In her case, I think she got a kick out of deciding what she wanted to do and then getting me to do it. Aside from the fun of going on trips, she also got her house and car repaired. Her life opened up tremendously as a result of our interactions. In my case, doing all this stuff was just a continuation of my regular life, so it was falling-down easy for me to do, and what I got in return was the knowledge that she loved me.

Now, she only had Role Fi, but to a starving man, bread and water are a feast.

I actually think that LSE's and LIE's are damaged or undeveloped in a particular way, in the sense that we have what is called one dimensional Fi, but is what I think of as retarded Fi. I actually think that Te-doms are stuck in an early development stage of children where, for example, the mother takes the little kid to the playground and he runs off to explore, and then stops, turns around, runs back to his mother to make sure that she's still there for him, and once reassured, goes off again to explore, his mother temporarily forgotten until the "love assurance" runs out and he has to return to her again.

Certainly, I've seen an LSE call home from work several times a day to check on his wife and ask her what she's doing and does she need anything. It is really the LSE who needs to know where his wife is, and he's the one who needs something from her. He needs her steady and reassuring existence. In return, he'll pick up dinner on the way home, pay for the house, and fix the toaster when he gets there. Because he can.

In my own case, I think I need to close the distance between me and my SO and be intimate for a while, until the "love meter" reads "full", and then I can go off and do things independently, working only with my Te and Ni, until the supply of love runs out and I need to return to fill it up again. But I need to know that she is nearby and is available when I need her. That is essential. I need that like oxygen.

Wow, that was eye opening.

I think I can understand also why this might have came after your first response too. It might have taken awhile to trickle down the chain of command until it got to Fi.

Same happens to me when in an argument. In the moment I am sure I have a point to make but lost for words, then much later the words come to me via Te and I can clearly state and articulate my points.

[FDG]

I actually think that LSE's and LIE's are damaged or undeveloped in a particular way, in the sense that we have what is called one dimensional Fi, but is what I think of as retarded Fi. I actually think that Te-doms are stuck in an early development stage of children where, for example, the mother takes the little kid to the playground and he runs off to explore, and then stops, turns around, runs back to his mother to make sure that she's still there for him, and once reassured, goes off again to explore, his mother temporarily forgotten until the "love assurance" runs out and he has to return to her again.

Certainly, I've seen an LSE call home from work several times a day to check on his wife and ask her what she's doing and does she need anything. It is really the LSE who needs to know where his wife is, and he's the one who needs something from her. He needs her steady and reassuring existence. In return, he'll pick up dinner on the way home, pay for the house, and fix the toaster when he gets there. Because he can.

In my own case, I think I need to close the distance between me and my SO and be intimate for a while, until the "love meter" reads "full", and then I can go off and do things independently, working only with my Te and Ni, until the supply of love runs out and I need to return to fill it up again. But I need to know that she is nearby and is available when I need her. That is essential. I need that like oxygen.

That's insightful and well explained.

[nanashi]

This times 1000. "Stratiyevskaya said it very well:

"Going out on a long journey or venturing on a risky venture, the LIE must feel assured that his "rear flank" is covered and that he has a "warm home" to return to - a place where someone is waiting for him and where he needs to return. For LIE it is very important to realize that he is very needed and dear to somebody, that his life is very valuable and significant, that there is somebody out there who loves him, who cares and waits for him. If there is nobody like this, the risks that the LIE takes on diminish in their value - his life and his work become meaningless. In accordance with the system of values ​​of the third quadra and of his dual dyad, the LIE risks himself for the success and well-being of his "team."

His "team" is a specific group of people with whom he is associated by strong tries and reliable relations. For the sake of friendship, love, respect and peace of these people the LIE is ready to take on any load, both physical and psychological, to endure thought any tests, to go for any risks and sacrifices - but it all makes sense only if this is needed by somebody."

As she stated, I can go out and do things in the real world without much in the way of human support, but I have to know that someone is available who cares about me."

[Zero]

This times 1000.

This was just posted by Adam in the same thread

[nanashi]

@Lord Pixel, I just realized that I have a better explanation for the quotation above that you found.

Normally, I'm engaged in highly rational Te activities and I'm not considering Fi human relations much at all. This means that I can go out and explore and influence the world in my limited way without needing too much in the way of deeply personal human interactions.

However, just because I don't need much in the way of human interactions on an intimate level, does not mean that I don't need ANY human interactions. I actually do need to know that I am loved in a deeply personal way by someone.

Stratiyevskaya said it very well:

"Going out on a long journey or venturing on a risky venture, the LIE must feel assured that his "rear flank" is covered and that he has a "warm home" to return to - a place where someone is waiting for him and where he needs to return. For LIE it is very important to realize that he is very needed and dear to somebody, that his life is very valuable and significant, that there is somebody out there who loves him, who cares and waits for him. If there is nobody like this, the risks that the LIE takes on diminish in their value - his life and his work become meaningless. In accordance with the system of values ​​of the third quadra and of his dual dyad, the LIE risks himself for the success and well-being of his "team."

His "team" is a specific group of people with whom he is associated by strong tries and reliable relations. For the sake of friendship, love, respect and peace of these people the LIE is ready to take on any load, both physical and psychological, to endure thought any tests, to go for any risks and sacrifices - but it all makes sense only if this is needed by somebody."

As she stated, I can go out and do things in the real world without much in the way of human support, but I have to know that someone is available who cares about me.

With my LSI GF, we'd not talk much during the week, and then we'd spend the weekend together, doing things that were either maintenance or just plain fun. We'd go camping, visit museums, walk in the woods, go swimming in a local lake, go on mini-trips to nearby interesting places, go to sports events, or sometimes we'd work on repairs to her home or car or do yard maintenance. Being with her in these times was easy and fun, with only a little of the gear-grinding that Mirage produces.

In her case, I think she got a kick out of deciding what she wanted to do and then getting me to do it. Aside from the fun of going on trips, she also got her house and car repaired. Her life opened up tremendously as a result of our interactions. In my case, doing all this stuff was just a continuation of my regular life, so it was falling-down easy for me to do, and what I got in return was the knowledge that she loved me.

Now, she only had Role Fi, but to a starving man, bread and water are a feast.

I actually think that LSE's and LIE's are damaged or undeveloped in a particular way, in the sense that we have what is called one dimensional Fi, but is what I think of as retarded Fi. I actually think that Te-doms are stuck in an early development stage of children where, for example, the mother takes the little kid to the playground and he runs off to explore, and then stops, turns around, runs back to his mother to make sure that she's still there for him, and once reassured, goes off again to explore, his mother temporarily forgotten until the "love assurance" runs out and he has to return to her again.

Certainly, I've seen an LSE call home from work several times a day to check on his wife and ask her what she's doing and does she need anything. It is really the LSE who needs to know where his wife is, and he's the one who needs something from her. He needs her steady and reassuring existence. In return, he'll pick up dinner on the way home, pay for the house, and fix the toaster when he gets there. Because he can.

In my own case, I think I need to close the distance between me and my SO and be intimate for a while, until the "love meter" reads "full", and then I can go off and do things independently, working only with my Te and Ni, until the supply of love runs out and I need to return to fill it up again. But I need to know that she is nearby and is available when I need her. That is essential. I need that like oxygen.

I love this. it explains my own needs so much...and my challenges. But, I don't think it's bad that our fi resembles a little kid looking in an adventure looking back and checking we're loved. I think it's actually (depending on if we handle it honorably) just a trait. It could be hella romantic to some ESIs....that we want them and look back while we're off adventuring. And, it could be an adaptive trait, helping us remember not to be an asshole and make it so a person has to leave us.