Kintypes are Underrated

[Rebelondeck]

..... My own observations of duality is that it seems like you say, difficult to start but good long term

I've often said that what people need isn't usually what they desire. It usually takes quite a few missteps to realize this - and even after realization, many will still choose to chase rainbows. Bad relationships can have addictive qualities while good ones usually don't. Some on this site have suggested that duals have addictive qualities but I would generally disagree even though some duals (usually with divergent backgrounds) would make terrible partners.

a.k.a. I/O

[Bethanyclaire]

I've often said that what people need isn't usually what they desire. It usually takes quite a few missteps to realize this - and even after realization, many will still choose to chase rainbows. Bad relationships can have addictive qualities while good ones usually don't. Some on this site have suggested that duals have addictive qualities but I would generally disagree even though some duals (usually with divergent backgrounds) would make terrible partners.

a.k.a. I/O

Thank you. Out of the duals I can think of there are only two who I experienced high (sort of) initial attraction to. I have worked out that they had similar/ compatible(?) enneagram tritype to me (high chemistry at least). I lost one guy's phone number otherwise I'd contact him haha. So yeah the romantic in me is annoyed about that. But even then I wouldn't consider them 'perfect' (reading about tritype/instincts has helped with this). And maybe a dual with slighty less attraction would actually be a better fit- more complimentary or something. Or a different type of good. Maybe like what you say about needs/desires being different. Soothing rather than exciting I dunno ha. I have met other duals who I have had a more normal or even dull sort of attraction to.

A possible overshare but..my experience of romance is very lacking and I'm not a young person anymore sadly :/ I'm at the 'having baby' age so am trying to meet someone I could settle down with. I'm glad to have read your article as it made me think of looking out for semi-duals (or another type) to meet. Types within the quadra didn't seem that appealing. And feeling comfortable is going to be quite important for me in dating someone but I would also like chemistry as I haven't experienced it before (apart from all those crushes lol). A semi-dual could tick those boxes unless a nice dual comes along..or other type...

I will add..that fortunately it is not all bad as I am a reasonably attractive person and armed with all this personality type knowledge (which I hope is getting to a healthy stage/level) I feel more calm and openminded about my prospects of meeting someone and dating. Well let's see..And your article and posts in general have helped me feel more mentally healthy, thank you. Learning about this stuff has been intense to say the least and it is nice to feel a bit more grounded.