Is there some kind of "help" or way to fix or improve the life of ppl who grew up in these kind of environment (without taking other ITRs as solution for s/he)?
Is there some kind of "help" or way to fix or improve the life of ppl who grew up in these kind of environment (without taking other ITRs as solution for s/he)?
If their problems are a result of no one needing them to be the people whom they actually are, but rather wanting them to be some other person, then what fix other than ITR would there be?Originally Posted by Blackberry
Yes, but what happens when different ITRs are not possible because these ppl are now this"hybrid" and other ppl from their own quadras don't accept them simply because they have been taught into opposite quadras for too long? Or when these ppl is not even wanting/looking to change from environment? I mean, I'm not talking about what externally can be done but what kind of focus this person can get to change or what options besides "go get your dual" would help. Duality is not the perfect solution to everything (as is not always achievable), and there are huge chances of not dualizing in life. But there's always a way to get better.
I think something like this happened to me. I am a Gamma NT raised by Delta ST's with a Delta ST sister and an Alpha NT sister. Basically, I was born into a world where Delta values were the only good values. My parent's white colonial house, full of Queen Anne furniture, a crystal chandelier and tchotchkes everywhere, was supposed to be the height of good taste, and it was constantly drilled into me that Feelers were all incomprehensibly stupid. I ended up marrying a person of the same type as my father.
This has caused me to be a very screwed up individual. However, I've recently been hanging out with duals and Activities and Identicals and Mirrors and gradually, little by little, I'm changing my values. It's a long slog, though.
Really, that article I linked above says it all. Just hang out with people who need you to be exactly who you are, and you can grow into yourself and get more confidence that your strengths really are strengths and not flaws, as you might have been taught.
(Why does this sound like advice for people who are coming out?)
*EDIT* If you really want a personal answer to your question, ask Olimpia. Her father is her Conflictor.
Last edited by Adam Strange; 05-04-2019 at 11:52 AM.
tbh, I've seen other LIEs experiencing romantic problems and I don't think all of them are related to parental figures. I think the configuration of LIE is not particularly great for romance (in general). I just think (1DFi and 1DSi) give LIE some plasticity in relationships, this along with Te (practicality) and Ni (forecasting) complete the master piece. I think ILE and LII can have similar problems.
I agree that my problems with romance are not entirely due to being raised out of quadra. All that did was to exclude duals from my list of possibles for a long time.
I completely agree that LIE's are not great for romance. I'm not romantic, and I don't know a single LIE who is. This bothers most women, I think. I know it bothered the LSI whom I was seeing. I'm not sure it bothers ESI's. I don't think it bothered my SLI ex-wife, but I'm not entirely sure about that.
I also only know two LIE's out of about eighteen who are in a dual marriage. The others are either single or are married to someone they should not have married.
Did you hate something in particular about your parents that your ex also had/used to do too? Or nothing like that?
I know one LSE woman rised with IEI farther and EIE mother.
One time she've said that one of reasons for her marriage was to run away from the family.
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