Stackings and Misconceptions

[VenusRose]

If you don't mind me asking, could you please elaborate on what you mean by "struggle over close relationships," DA?

[DirectorAbbie]

If you don't mind me asking, could you please elaborate on what you mean by "struggle over close relationships," DA?

Things like having trouble keeping them close rather than casual. Or wanting more from them than you get. Or being afraid of losing them even when there's a lack of evidence that would happen.

Maybe the fear is related to stacking.
Afraid of losing your health and safety? sp
Afraid of losing your place in the community? so
Afraid of losing your close relationships? sx

But for myself, I've never been afraid of losing a romantic relationship. I think to me, those were more practical than intimate. So maybe of the sp category.

[VenusRose]

Things like having trouble keeping them close rather than casual. Or wanting more from them than you get. Or being afraid of losing them even when there's a lack of evidence that would happen.

Maybe the fear is related to stacking.
Afraid of losing your health and safety? sp
Afraid of losing your place in the community? so
Afraid of losing your close relationships? sx

But for myself, I've never been afraid of losing a romantic relationship. I think to me, those were more practical than intimate. So maybe of the sp category.

It seems like sx is there but it may be either first or second depending on what exactly closeness means to you...
and yeah, sx need not be just over romantic relationships, it can be over friendships too, as I have one sx first friend who feels like she approaches friendships like "people approach romantic relationships" and that it's very intense and she often feels unsure if she would find another friend who would want the same as she does.
Do you relate to that, DA?
Do you also feel like you may obsess over something specific - this sort of one-on-one feeling, like you are completely immersed in it? Does it happen to you with friendships? Like you zero in on one person and you just...want to be really, really close to them?
Do you feel like you are trying to find 'that one thing' wrt to relationships...? Some sort of ideal that you maybe can't quite put into words.

[DirectorAbbie]

I have one sx first friend who feels like she approaches friendships like "people approach romantic relationships" and that it's very intense and she often feels unsure if she would find another friend who would want the same as she does.
Do you relate to that, DA?

I honestly don't fathom how people approach romantic relationships, so that's like asking whether you squeeze waffles like other people squeeze plasmaloids.

Do you also feel like you may obsess over something specific - this sort of one-on-one feeling, like you are completely immersed in it? Does it happen to you with friendships? Like you zero in on one person and you just...want to be really, really close to them?
Do you feel like you are trying to find 'that one thing' wrt to relationships...? Some sort of ideal that you maybe can't quite put into words.

Yeah, I zero in on people. Initially I don't think about being close to them. Then if I realize it's happening, it's like an excited baby clapping and saying, "more, more!" and crying when it stops.

Nope! That's Sp secondary

Yeah, squark already cleared that up.

Are you, then, trying to fit in your asexuality with the requirements of Sx-dom?

Eh, more like pre-counter those who would disagree with my being sx on that basis.

Things like having trouble keeping them close rather than casual. Or wanting more from them than you get. Or being afraid of losing them even when there's a lack of evidence that would happen. [...]

But for myself, I've never been afraid of losing a romantic relationship. I think to me, those were more practical than intimate. So maybe of the sp category.

The latter sounds Sx second. The first sounds like a tertiary 6. You, as a leader type would like to keep people in your enterprise? You want to be the pivot of the "community," be the father of this "extended family?"

Huh? No.

The latter I am saying is not related to sx because I've never had a romantic relationship based off emotional closeness. Just, "I like this person. They'd be acceptable to live with for the rest of my life, and we could have a mutually beneficial life together." Then they wanted to get mushy about it and I was like, "ew, no." and bored.

I don't see myself as a leader type. If I end up as the pivot of a community, that's nice, but I don't seek it. And I don't want to be a father-figure.

[Neokortex]

Things like having trouble keeping them close rather than casual. Or wanting more from them than you get. Or being afraid of losing them even when there's a lack of evidence that would happen. [...]

But for myself, I've never been afraid of losing a romantic relationship. I think to me, those were more practical than intimate. So maybe of the sp category.

The latter sounds Sx second. The first sounds like a tertiary 6. You, as a leader type would like to keep people in your enterprise? You want to be the pivot of the "community," be the father of this "extended family?"