Out of place and poetical : what's my type?

[Vespertine]

Ye so, hello,
I really don't trust myself with typing, I merely feel clueless about it, even though I have read about Jung based stuff for over a year now.
(Maybe I have read too much and got too many contradictory informations/stereotypes, hah)
With MBTI tests, I had every intuitive types and ISTJ once.
On socionics', I get ILI. (I ish shpeciul lol)

Member Questionnaire

What is beauty? What is love?
Beauty is when a subject experience life and sees, hears, feels beauty.
Love has many weird definitions that can almost all be replaced by "prefering life with X", no matter how toxic X might be. (Included codependency and abusive relationships as I have heard people call them love?)

What are your most important values?
Petting cats! *^*
Seriously, I'm not sure what values even are anymore... I'm not kind nor generous... perhaps I have none.

Do you have any sort of spiritual/religious beliefs, and why do you hold (or don't) those beliefs in the first place?
I hope there is something after death, but meh.
Suicide is a bad option because of those supposed afterlifes, or lack thereof, as abandoning your problems would give you a worst next life, a ticket to hell, or nothing at all if life is all we have.

Opinion on war and militaries? What is power to you?
Wars have been a thing for as long as history goes, there is no getting rid of that.
A power source is what my phone needs right now... ha.
There is innate power (strenght, talents...) and given power, when people give power over their life for some reason.
Some people who are used to be given power sometimes try to take power from others by force which can lead to a war when said person is in a powerful enough position.
Though giving power to someone you believe can heal you and it actually works is a crazy thing.

What have you had long conversations about? What are your interests? Why?
Usually people tell me at lenght about what they like. I don't really know if I have interests, what does that word even mean?
All those subjective concept don't make sense anymore. @-@

Interested in health/medicine as a conversation topic? Are you focused on your body?
No choice, people keep telling me all about their meds.
I hurt my back by thinking in odd positions, can barely remember to ear sometimes.

What do you think of daily chores?
I wish I had space to properly clean up my piles...

Books or films you liked? Recently read/watched or otherwise. Examples welcome.
I like animation movies.
I read about anything, from pholosophy to fantasy and even caution notice, labels, instructions on food, aything I lay eyes on.

What has made you cry? What has made you smile? Why?
Stress, tiredness make me cry.
I don't like smiling. It's uncomfortable and ugly.

Where do you feel: at one with the environment/a sense of belonging?
Where I am alone.

What have people seen as your weaknesses? What do you dislike about yourself?
Weird, tactless, WEIRD.
Nobody has ever called me fake, but playing a role is the only way I can socialise.
Social interactions are exhausting and too big a part of my life currently.

What have people seen as your strengths? What do you like about yourself?
People have rarely called me anything else than beautiful... sometimes it's like all I am to others and I find this sickening.
I was told I write in a "poetic" way but I don't see it.
If you are curious > http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...y-to-go-places

In what areas of your life would you like help?
What is my type? ; D

Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it.
Yes, usualy happens from too much social interactions, ending up stuck in a "role" and hating myself.

What qualities do you most like and dislike in other people? What types do you get along with?
I need comprehensive, supportive people as I am quite odd and need lots of time alone.
I cannot stand loud, highly social people who wants me to participate to the party.
I don't want to be around sugar coaters, touchy-feely people but I can deal with them.
Manipulative, sadistic people are out of question.

How do you feel about romance/sex? What qualities do you want in a partner?
Romance is weird, sex seems boring, this almost sounds like the begining of a sh*tty poem...
I want someone with whom to have interesting conversations, who is comprehensive and supportive... and not too sticky.

If you were to raise a child, what would be your main concerns, what measures would you take, and why?
Getting rid of it. Children are terrifying.

A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward and outward reaction?
Depends, if hateful I reconsider seeing this person, if not meh.

How do you choose your friends and how do you behave around them?
Still unsure what friendship means...
I never chose anyone, just dealt wih whoever was there... up to the point of seeing them as burdens and ghosting.

How do you behave around strangers?
Try to be nice, try to be interested, get tired, get bitter, go home and say "NEVER AGAIN", do it again anyway.

Have a cute cat for your trouble. : 3

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