Quote Originally Posted by lump View Post
I dont get it
I hear this every day, many times a day. The truth is that mentally, I am very fluid and will readily shift from one idea to the next. My reality is never static. This gives me flexibility, it means that I can adapt if things don't go to plan. However, the corollary is that I am easily bored, often don't complete what I start and jump around a lot. Can I guarantee that I'll tell you the same thing tomorrow as I have today? No. But why should that even matter? All that matters, in the end, is what I do. Not what I say.

The truth is, I could change radically in a moment, but then a whole year will pass where one day seems to blend into the next. That vexes many people in my life. My advice to you, as it has always been to them, is to stop trying to make sense of me, put me into a box and assume what works for you will for me. What I need is a network, for someone to put me in a situation where I can shine. Then I'll do what I do best. But I need to be given these opportunities in the first place. While my plans may change, I never, ever lose sight of my goal.

It is unwise to impose your own beliefs and methods upon me, as I prefer to create my own and will be indifferent to what has worked in the past. Your approach should not fixed like a religion, and become some moral issue of principle. I will always move very quickly to deal with any new problems that arise. What I ask is for people to trust my ability, and give me the responsibility and tools I need to get started. The few times that this has happened, I ran riot over any competition I had and made a big impression on my audience. I will think outside the box and don't have the ritualistic hangups that many people do. At the end of the day the only agenda I have is success and won't let virtue signalling get in the way. What success means to me isn't a hoard of money and social status, either, because that shit is shallow and can never make you happy (just look at Hollywood), so I don't get distracted from what I want. Success means sex with someone who loves me and mastery of my art. Fame may come as a natural consequence of that, but it would be a bonus and is never the objective.

My main problem is that the lack of pleasure and joy in my life drains me of energy, and this places a practical limit upon my creativity. I need affection, particularly sexual intimacy, as this provides me with the passion and momentum required to achieve my potential. Thus, isolation is crippling for me, but the extreme, impolitic nature of my personality is just culturally unacceptable here. I make a lot of people, and women especially, feel violated, overwhelmed and anxious. They react impulsively and become defensive, both of which annoy me to no end. I love strength and focus, especially when they are unleashed in bed