So, How to date a dual and do I have one or is duality a myth?

[Adam Strange]

If the instincts are things you need to feel secure, then Sx-firsts need that one reliable person they can count on, and So-firsts need to belong to a group, and Sp-firsts need material resources.

Personally, as an Sx-first, I find I really do need to connect with one other person. I get pathetically desperate when I'm not connected. Since not everyone is Sx-first, and they can't understand why I'm obsessed with connection, I've tried to get them to understand by asking them how they'd feel (if an So-first) if the group they belonged to (at work, at school, at church, where ever) suddenly and publicly rejected them, or how they'd feel (if an sp-first) if they woke up and suddenly discovered that all their money is gone. Every last cent vanished without a trace from their savings and retirement accounts, and the debt collectors are here to evict them for non-payment, and their car is missing and their phone doesn't work.

That's kind of how I feel without a partner. My main problem isn't finding a dual, or a partner of any kind, for that matter. My problem is slowing down enough to take a good look at them.

[PrettySavage]

If the instincts are things you need to feel secure, then Sx-firsts need that one reliable person they can count on, and So-firsts need to belong to a group, and Sp-firsts need material resources.

Personally, as an Sx-first, I find I really do need to connect with one other person. I get pathetically desperate when I'm not connected. Since not everyone is Sx-first, and they can't understand why I'm obsessed with connection, I've tried to get them to understand by asking them how they'd feel (if an So-first) if the group they belonged to (at work, at school, at church, where ever) suddenly and publicly rejected them, or how they'd feel (if an sp-first) if they woke up and suddenly discovered that all their money is gone. Every last cent vanished without a trace from their savings and retirement accounts, and the debt collectors are here to evict them for non-payment, and their car is missing and their phone doesn't work.

That's kind of how I feel without a partner. My main problem isn't finding a dual, or a partner of any kind, for that matter. My problem is slowing down enough to take a good look at them.

I feel the same, just that in my case I need more than one person (that'd be a precarious situation, and suffocating), and those connections are not necessarily based on romantic/sexual interest.

Back on topic: the fact that looking down at my close friends list I see that they are, with two notable exceptions, Betas is looking indicative to me. Now I have to find a way to find out which of the three types is my dual

[Adam Strange]

I feel the same, just that in my case I need more than one person (that'd be a precarious situation, and suffocating), and those connections are not necessarily based on romantic/sexual interest.

I've had relationships which were primarily sexual, but they didn't last. With LTR's, it has been friendship first.

One weird thing (to keep this thread on-topic) is that, while I like talking and spending time with my duals, I don't find them instantly hot the way I do Mirage partners. This reaction might be specific to me, since I haven't read about it anywhere else. I've met some incredibly, objectively hot female duals, and I kind of do not connect their hotness to a desire for action the way I do with Mirage types. I have a more "I like you. I think we could get along" reaction to duals.

I'd like to hear from other LIE's about this, to see if their reactions are the same. I could explain my approach by saying that I'm subconsciously anticipating that ESI's don't want to be desired for their beauty alone, since that can change, but I might be stretching things here to account for some unfortunate bending of my mental twigs.

[FDG]

I've had relationships which were primarily sexual, but they didn't last. With LTR's, it has been friendship first.

One weird thing (to keep this thread on-topic) is that, while I like talking and spending time with my duals, I don't find them instantly hot the way I do Mirage partners. This reaction might be specific to me, since I haven't read about it anywhere else. I've met some incredibly, objectively hot female duals, and I kind of do not connect their hotness to a desire for action the way I do with Mirage types. I have a more "I like you. I think we could get along" reaction to duals.

I'd like to hear from other LIE's about this, to see if their reactions are the same. I could explain my approach by saying that I'm subconsciously anticipating that ESI's don't want to be desired for their beauty alone, since that can change, but I might be stretching things here to account for some unfortunate bending of my mental twigs.

yeah lsi women are sexy and they are also usually quite forward...

they usually have completely different circle of friends and expectations about life though.

I also have many LSI male friends. We usually do sports or Se-related activities together. But I can´t hang out with their friends, and they can´t easily hang out with mine.