Help me type myself, please? Still lost. Member Questionnaire (Katalina)
People & Interactions
What qualities do you most like and dislike in other people? What types do you get along with?
I like people that are not emotionally needy because it is draining for me, and I often feel obligated to help. I dislike people that get worked up over small issues, and I dislike people that only see what is on the surface. I get along with people who are easy-going and do not pry. I tend to know people that ask me a lot of questions about myself, and it gives me anxiety. I knew someone who constantly pushed me to open up more, and they often complained that I was too difficult to read, and I started to resent them. I get along very well with unassuming people that still try to get me out of my comfort zone (just in less emotional ways). As in, they initiate conversation and invite me places because I am really bad at that. Life is about growth to me, so relationships that provide novelty are important. You can find out new things about yourself; discover new interests, experience new feelings, and refine the way you see the world.
How do you feel about romance/sex? What qualities do you want in a partner?
In general, I honestly don't care about romance because it’s rare that I’m interested in another person on a deeper level (that sounded really pretentious... hahaha). Though, sometimes, I will find myself longing for a connection, but my idealistic view of the relationship in my head doesn’t meet reality, and so the reality of relationships tend to bore and disappoint me. I tend to not the see “the point” of getting close to people, and I tend to wear a socially appropriate mask to avoid intimacy. The way people connect with one another feels alien to me. Things that are considered normal by other people in relationships are extremely weird to me, and I often don’t see the point in romantic gestures.
If you were to raise a child, what would be your main concerns, what measures would you take, and why?
I would think about the negative effects that my parents’ parenting style had on me, and try to refine the way I treat my children. I would avoid doing things that had a negative effect on me, and reiterate the positive. Also, people in this world are predominantly bad. I would make sure my child knew that... I would be scared someone would prey on their naive, innocent nature. Also, I would make sure they knew they were in a safe place; that they could talk to me about anything. Emotional problems or otherwise.
A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward and outward reaction?
Hmmmm. I have become desensitized to caring. Everyone perceives the world in a different way, and I tend to figure out why they think what they do by asking questions about their past experiences, or their other opinions on different topics, etc (even if I think it’s dumb). I try to understand their perspective for an interesting conversation. I may try to persuade them into thinking the way I do if I care enough, but I usually am too passive to care. If I knew them well, I'd debate them... Explain my reasoning, and hopefully, have an interesting discussion. If it is someone I don't know well, I'd probably just ask them why, and say, “oh, you’re probably right.” all the while, tearing it apart inwardly. Because I know that my love for debate comes off as argumentative and aggressive to some.
Describe your relationship to society. How do you see people as a whole? What do you consider a prevalent social problem? Name one.
Uuuuhhh. I feel like an outsider, I suppose. I’m passive. Not really engaging with the world. I don’t really have any interest in directly impacting the world, nor do I really care that much about things happening in society. I'm more selfish, I think, when it comes to the things I want to accomplish. I tend to be very unconcerned with protests and stuff like that. I cringe when saying “outsider” because it makes me sound like I'm trying too hard to be a special snowflake, but I can't seem to relate to most people. Sometimes, I see everyone as all actors in a play, but I want to know what is really going on underneath the appearances. There are a lot of prevalent social problems... but one that irritates me the most is the fact that people don't seem to try to understand anyone's viewpoint but their own, as I stated a lot earlier.
How do you choose your friends and how do you behave around them?
I tend to befriend anyone which is contradicting because I am very private and introverted. I tend to keep everyone at arms-length emotionally without forming attachments, but still be open-arms in being kind to everyone that approaches me, if that makes sense...?
How do you behave around strangers?
Two ways. Either I’m wearing a social mask or not. I often was referred to as “robotic” in my youth. People would come up to me and ask why I didn’t have an apparent emotional expression. It even went as far as a friend telling me that when they first met me, they thought I had Aspergers. Hahaha. I was self conscious about this, so I put in a lot of effort to make myself appear as... warm and fuzzy outwardly as possible, so that people would find me more approachable. I tend to do this a lot of out of habit. I tend to put a big, phony smile on my face, and often get remarks like, “Why do you look so happy?” from strangers. It’s very draining to do, but if I want to to be seen as likeable because I am feeling particularly lonely or am seeking a connection, I will wear it. It’s quite bubbly, optimistic, enthusiastic, but definitely not true to how I am feeling inwardly. I will often give people optimism and reassure them to make them feel better, often because I want them to like me, and also, I cringe when other people are uncomfortable. The second way I act is, I am much more low-energy, verbose, and monotone which is how I tend to be around people I am comfortable around. I always am goofy, rambly, overly-analytical, and self-deprecating, though. Whether I am wearing a mask or not... unless, I’m in a formal situation.
Interests
Interested in health/medicine as a conversation topic? Are you focused on your body?
I am detached from bodily sensations. Often, I will have a headache, and I'll be confused until I realized I have not eaten all day. I'm absent-minded and lost within my thoughts, so I often forget about my body. As for health/medicine, it is very interesting to me to learn about different kinds of medicines and how they affect the body.
What have you had long conversations about? What are your interests? Why?
Human motivation; why people do the things they do. I like to debate a lot. The last long conversation I had with someone was debating whether or not experimenting on animals was justified or not. My interests are psychology and neuroscience, and I also enjoy good humor and a laid-back atmosphere. I enjoy video games and reading.
What do you think of daily chores?
Doing the same chore every day at the same time sounds boring to me.
Books or films you liked? Recently read/watched or otherwise. Examples welcome.
I like informational books As for stories, I like mystery novels a lot. I also like science fiction and fantasy. I kind of use it as a form of escapism.
What has made you cry? What has made you smile? Why?
I have a quirky sense of humor. Weird things make me laugh, and I like making fun of the absurdity of situations. I tend to cry over the same thing for a very long time and hold a grudge, but never have an emotional release, because I don’t really know how to deal with these things. Overall, I'm quite unemotional, though.
Where do you feel: at one with the environment/a sense of belonging?
When I’m absorbing information and am free to pursue the goals I want to accomplish without limitations.
Evaluation & Behaviour
What have people seen as your weaknesses? What do you dislike about yourself?
Inability to open up, secretiveness, stubbornness.
What have people seen as your strengths? What do you like about yourself?
Open-mindedness, understanding, independence, strong will, and compassion. I like my resilience and intellect.
In what areas of your life would you like help?
To be comfortable with emotional intimacy, predominantly. Also, to deal with my problems without avoiding them.
Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it.
I often feel “stuck in a rut” when I feel as though my life is stagnant, and I’m not growing/evolving as a person, or accomplishing my life goals. Life to me is a constant process of growth, and when I feel as though I am not growing, life feels rather lackluster.
Thank you if you took the time to read all of this. I honestly have no clue.
Originally Posted by phantombride
