I'm not sure how to articulate this. I don't assume that what I see with someone is what I get. There are many ways I cannot fully know another person. For example, I can get only a wistful inkling of what an adult was like as a child and as an infant, even if I have photos and video of them to look at. That version of the person has been superseded by the adult version. And even in the present moment, I feel that there's more to a person than they can make fully manifest, and also that they do not owe it to me to reveal everything about themselves, and I wouldn't press for them to say or show more than they feel confident expressing.
I find it would be disrespectful to expect someone to cough up more of their inner life than they do. I'm interested in the feelings that arise from someone else's world, but I don't demand that they give me details. That can almost be a form of interpersonal violence. I just try to get a feeling for what might be there and don't dig or poke into it much.
ETA: I think part of what seems disrespectful is that putting all your wounds on display is also a way of showing all your vulnerabilities, and those can be used against a person, so why in the hell would I expect someone to trot out their weaknesses for me? Sometimes what is kept inside is in there for a reason.
I guess if I care about someone, or even if I'm just in a position where I am supposed to pay them some attention, the metaphor I've given in the past is that I put a quiet bubble of awareness around the person. I attune to them and kind of shut out other information. This came up in chat once and a coupla people observed it sounded like enneagram SX instinct, but I really don't know bc I find the instincts dumb so far.Enveloping, can you describe this a bit more too?
*wipes sweat from brow*Er. Done with the questions.
LSI: “I still can’t figure out Pinterest.”
Me: “It’s just, like, idea boards.”
LSI: “I don’t have ideas.”
OK, I see.
That sounds umm, interesting. I don't know if it's an EIE thing or sx thing, or whatever in the specific form of this that I'm thinking of. I've seen this before though.I guess if I care about someone, or even if I'm just in a position where I am supposed to pay them some attention, the metaphor I've given in the past is that I put a quiet bubble of awareness around the person. I attune to them and kind of shut out other information. This came up in chat once and a coupla people observed it sounded like enneagram SX instinct, but I really don't know bc I find the instincts dumb so far.
End of Inquisition for now.*wipes sweat from brow*