Quote Originally Posted by aster View Post
My husband is really the only reason I’m not dead.
To stay you alive contributed anything what was useful or pleasant, including done by many people.

Where people with who you communicate the most, for example as your pair and others in a family, affect strongly on your emotional state. When you feel good or bad - those people are among main reasons, and how we deal with them. Main part of life's pleasure and suffering goes from relations and actions with other people. It's doubtful to feel happy when you do not perceive yourself as loved and loving, as humans psyche is collective. And the most pain we remember from events with people, not from physical traumas or diseases.

When you long feel good or bad emotional state - people near you affected on this much, including the husband. By what they did and did not. It's also your pair's duty so you'd feel good, including emotionally. With other people near you'd could to feel significantly differently - better or worse.
When you choose a pair with a small attention to mutual personal sympathy - it's hard to feel emotionally good in such relations, as you are among personally alien people who do not give what you want the most. It's useless to try compensate this by material things and by mental distractions. It can be compensated in communications with other people which are more appropriate for you, or somehow to change your relations with those who are near already closer to friendship relations - when you have more what you do together and like how you do that.