I don't get dual relationships (duality)

[Lord Pixel]

@Lord Pixel, this is a really constructive post for me right now, in regard to what you said about ESI's. I have recently, slowly been coming to the conclusion that ESI's really do operate on the basis of how they feel about things.



I know, I know, all the books say that's what ESI's do. They are Fi-doms, right? I just have a hard time believing that someone could really, actually be that way. It's like someone tells you that some people can read minds. Right, buddy.

I've known several male ESI's for many years, and while I get along with them easily and have interacted with them on hundreds if not thousands of occasions, I just never thought that they were MAKING DECISIONS BASED ON HOW THEY FEEL ABOUT THINGS, FOR GOD'S SAKE.

Damn right !!!!!!!!! What's so weird about that? lol.
That had me dying.

Chocolate or vanilla? Vanilla. Because I like it better.

There is a female ESI artist whom I've known for about five years, and I'm embarrassed to say that my feelings for her are very strong, Embarrassed, because she's 25. (Goddammit, Adam, get a grip.) I'm happy around her and I can't tell her how I feel because if I did, she'd probably start seeing me as a pervert Uncle. So I don't tell her anything, and she always keeps at arm's length, even though I can tell that she likes being around me, too. For Duality reasons. She just gets observably happy when I'm around.
She came over to my house to take some pictures of her artwork for a website she's making, and as we were moving a table, my arm brushed hers and I glanced at her and she had an inner warm, secret smile on her face, and I thought, what the hell does that mean? It means she's liking me right now, in the moment, without regard to the future. To me, this is both insane and everything I've ever wanted. She told me her work schedule is eight days on, six days off, and it is exhausting her, and I told her she needs to find something more balanced, and she agreed, and then she flew out the door for Colorado, because that was the next thing on her list to do. >_<

I felt those words lol. But yea I never considered that it's just she just likes you in the moment and that's it and nothing beyond that moment, that is very different.
Both insane and everything you've ever wanted that's great.

Ah so just doing what's the next thing on the list, is that also Ne PoLR, I feel like it is, the lack of alternatives and the direct Se doing what's right in front of youness.

As for how an LIE and an LSE Kindred get along, I work with an LSE and he's smart, reliable, and after I got past my associated feelings about my LSE mother, I have to say that when he and I are talking business and engineering, we absolutely click. It is like talking to myself, only he has a slightly different agenda. I'm all about covering all the future bases, and he's all about building something that works not great but adequately and reliably for the customer. We totally understand what the other person is saying. We don't ever talk about feelings, because we don't exactly have any, and I think we both know that.
As for the hierarchy, he works at my direction, and he accepts that, unless he's working on a project that I'm not involved in, in which case he ignores me. I don't want him to be subservient, I want him to be him with all his talents, making the best decisions he can, with occasional input from my future planning. In turn, I bow to him when he talks about making things simple enough to deliver to the customer on time. I think I'm tuned to that because ESI's tend to do that, too.

Yea I think the issue is LSE is like I am the man and want's LIE to be the woman but it's requires her to bite her tongue.