Quote Originally Posted by lemontrees View Post
If your friend is really SEI...

he might have to come to a place, psychologically, where he feels motivated to save himself.
This is what DA types think about themselves, which often end up in navel gazing disintegration into oblivion. I've actually seen this occur for so many DA types.

SEI, EIE, ILI, LSE etc.

If there's one thing about their duals is that ILE, LSI, SEE, EII are all very aggressive and decisive about fixing stuff once they've come to a decision point.

There are different leverage points in the super id and id for each type but it's actually quite hard to make DA types pick a path when they're in their negativist death spiral, regardless of the information compatibility.

My parents both happen to be DA types, and having had to deal with their ambiguous intransigence my entire life has been more or less a nightmare as I am not their duals nor do they listen to me.

In my life the only thing that has worked to break them out of this intransigence has been withdrawal and some form of punishment, ultimatum, etc.

And it always ends up with them taking the negative position until my withdrawal is so total that they eventually capitulate, and even then reluctantly.

DA believes there is a middle ground in whatever position they're seeking, and this ambiguity is self-destructive when there is actually no middle ground, the middle ground is actually self destructive.

For CD types, there is never a true middle ground and sometimes their decisiveness is what is necessary but ultimately it takes the correct timing and a lot of effort to have success.

This particular scenario has no middle ground, treatment and a better life or no treatment and a poor life. The ambiguity is typical imo of DA type self-destructivness, and is often a very maladapted coping mechanism in order to acquire a sense of control.

One of the things about duality may be that duals do not tolerate what might be self-destructive behavior/coping mechanisms of their counterpart and react very aggressively to these maladaptations. Even if it is not sustainable relationship wise, it might be transformative.