Quote Originally Posted by Iris View Post
I will have to chime in that I want to be heard, too. So maybe that is a characteristic of rationals in general, who knows?

My ESE friend that I wrote about earlier in this thread doesn't have the problem of space invasion and talkativeness. She is very verbal about what she needs for her comfort. And then she shuts up about it.

I do have two ESE friends who talk constantly and it does wear me out because I feel that I have to listen and respond to be polite. It never occurred to me that talking might be their way of controlling the world. Very interesting to think about.

One of those ESEs has an IEE daughter who talks a lot as well. The IEE recently told me that when she was a little girl, she (the IEE) used to pray that she would be able to stop talking so much. That prayer didn't get answered. The IEE remains a talker, but she doesn't really care if you respond to all of what she says. When I roomed with the IEE, I would faintly hear her talking in another room and I would think that I had to stop what I was doing and go listen to what she was saying and respond. After a while, I realized that she didn't care if I came and listened to her, that she would come tell me something if she wanted me to respond. That was a relief, but I still felt a bit rude if I heard her talking and didn't go find out if she needed something.
yeah, tbh i'm aware that my "problems" with ESE's and or other rationals are probably partly because i'm just an extremely lazy and irrational person. I'm extremely sure that a lot of my friends and families have annoyances like the one I have with rationals but with me.

I think they're cool awesome and fun, just not for extreme long periods. I have that also with beta's, i love their groups and such, but i can only be there for maybe one day max before needing to run for the hills basically. This is me, not them.

That's why "how could you hate ESE's" or "all ESE's suck" is always wrong, i mean to some types ESE's will be heaven on earth, to others they'll be neutral and to their worst matches they'll be hell. For me it's good to understand what exactly tires me in some types (for instance i dislike types that'll try to invade my space when i'm walling off, i need the walls for a reason and a specific period of time, no prodding is gonna help) so i can try and work around those things a bit. (for instance by walling off somewhere in another physical area rather than as usual just spacing out on the couch).