INFjs and HA Si

[Becca]

I dont understand why you feel that was rude? I just simply said "same here".
You are weird.

U were making fun of me

[Suz]

U were making fun of me

Are you serious??? I was not!! I was resonating!

[Becca]

Are you serious??? I was not!! I was resonating!

Lol ok

[Suz]

Lol ok

sorry for the misunderstanding!

[Iris]

Why would you say dualized EII's dress with more flair? I like to dress well, yet with modesty. I try to look good no matter being "dualized" or not.

My EIIs are pretty consistantly "safe" when choosing clothes and will keep things a long time. None of them want to stand out. They dress to fit in. One of them is really focused on everything matching and will go to several stores to find pants that exactly match a little flower in a shirt. She spends a huge amount of time choosing outfits that match but are boring. Her look is also slightly out of style because she keeps things so long. The guy EII shops at men's stores and wears typical business attire. He is careful not to buy clothes that stand out.

The 2 dualized ones have spouses that enjoy helping them shop and tell them to buy things that are more stylish, less "safe." Their duals notice changing trends and remark when something is starting to be out of style and they tell the EIIs to get something new. The LSEs don't mind spending money and prod the EIIs to relax and spend a little more money on accessories.

[lemontrees]

I've seen a bunch of trendy hipstery EII's.

They are usually pretty slim, and can pull off a "chic and pretty yet slightly androgynous" look. Like St. Vincent. I had one gay EII friend who was sooo sharp all the time, just dressed in these slim fitted shirts/jackets/jeans to perfection.

I think Alexander Wang, the fashion designer (Balenciaga), is EII:



or maybe he's IEE...?

[Becca]

sorry for the misunderstanding!

I'm sorry. I'm not used to people being so sincere and upbeat that I just assumed you were mocking me. But you are an IEE, and they can be that way.
I read somewhere that IEE and EII in relation to each other can be very unpredictable, as in they'll surprise each other and not know what is coming next. I see this with my IEE friend; sometimes I won't trust her that she really likes me or something. And I think it's vice versa.
But there are times where we get along great, and have a blast. We can be walking in the street and being really weird together, like making french accents and skipping. Lol. I just always wonder if she finds me boring

[Becca]

My EIIs are pretty consistantly "safe" when choosing clothes and will keep things a long time. None of them want to stand out. They dress to fit in. One of them is really focused on everything matching and will go to several stores to find pants that exactly match a little flower in a shirt. She spends a huge amount of time choosing outfits that match but are boring. Her look is also slightly out of style because she keeps things so long. The guy EII shops at men's stores and wears typical business attire. He is careful not to buy clothes that stand out.

I can hear this. I do spend a lot of time going to many stores to find what I want, and then I keep them for a long time. There are a few things that were a little too conservative that I bought in a moment, and I never wear them. Yup, I don't like to stand out. But I like looking good and with the times, and I have an ENTj friend that tells me she loves my style.

The 2 dualized ones have spouses that enjoy helping them shop and tell them to buy things that are more stylish, less "safe." Their duals notice changing trends and remark when something is starting to be out of style and they tell the EIIs to get something new. The LSEs don't mind spending money and prod the EIIs to relax and spend a little more money on accessories.

I go shopping with an LSE sometimes, and she did point out to buy certain shoes that I would never buy on my own, I saw how they could be good, and I loved them in the end.
Not all LSE's like to spend money; my LSE friend yells at me if I spend too much. But I can see how they could be good like that

[Suz]

I'm sorry. I'm not used to people being so sincere and upbeat that I just assumed you were mocking me. But you are an IEE, and they can be that way.
I read somewhere that IEE and EII in relation to each other can be very unpredictable, as in they'll surprise each other and not know what is coming next. I see this with my IEE friend; sometimes I won't trust her that she really likes me or something. And I think it's vice versa.
But there are times where we get along great, and have a blast. We can be walking in the street and being really weird together, like making french accents and skipping. Lol. I just always wonder if she finds me boring

it's a similar dynamic between me and my (suspected) EII boss.


and no problem... i'm sorry that you've been around such insincere people...

[Joy]

My boyfriend is most definitely EII, and he loves doing Si stuff for me. He makes me breakfast every morning, and he often makes dinner, too. He is always interested in learning new cooking techniques (mostly from me, some from the internet) and recipes. He loves trying new restaurants and cuisines. He isn't a germaphobe, but he is sort of obsessive about having hands that aren't greasy or sticky. He enjoys taking care of me if I'm sick or injured and loves being praised for doing a good job of it. He also does most of the dishes.

Sometimes I think he's better at Si than I am, but no. He just works harder at it.

[Joy]

He also likes fixing things. He fixed our dyer when a belt went, for example. He does hardware/soldering repairs on electronics, too.

[ashlesha]

my ne-eii best friend is a germphobe. she describes herself as "ocd" but she's not really. just a clean freak. its kind of funny how she will be in frantic need to wash her hands after something like touching her mouth and getting lip gloss on them because they are then all "dirty and sticky." she won't shop at thrift stores (even though she feels guilty and says she doesn't mean to be snobby) because the idea of wearing clothes that strangers have worn gives her the heebie jeebies. her preferences don't always make sense, like she will share lipstick not not deoderant...its more about an internal feeling of what makes her feel yucky and what doesn't.

[Becca]

My boyfriend is most definitely EII, and he loves doing Si stuff for me. He makes me breakfast every morning, and he often makes dinner, too. He is always interested in learning new cooking techniques (mostly from me, some from the internet) and recipes. He loves trying new restaurants and cuisines. He isn't a germaphobe, but he is sort of obsessive about having hands that aren't greasy or sticky. He enjoys taking care of me if I'm sick or injured and loves being praised for doing a good job of it. He also does most of the dishes.

Sometimes I think he's better at Si than I am, but no. He just works harder at it.

Sounds like me, I love doing things for people I love like baking them food or buying gifts. It gives me pleasure.

I feel the same about ESTj's sometimes in regards to Ne. It's so interesting to think that someone would work hard at Ne. I am always ready to pour out random Ne things, and my ESTj friend always tells me "your always saying things out of nowhere." She doesn't appreciate it.
But she always manages to come up with funny/ cute anecdotes that are very over the top. She enjoys relating them, so I can't stop her. Unless I change the subject. I understand what she's saying, but I do not always have things to add.

[Becca]

my ne-eii best friend is a germphobe. she describes herself as "ocd" but she's not really. just a clean freak. its kind of funny how she will be in frantic need to wash her hands after something like touching her mouth and getting lip gloss on them because they are then all "dirty and sticky." she won't shop at thrift stores (even though she feels guilty and says she doesn't mean to be snobby) because the idea of wearing clothes that strangers have worn gives her the heebie jeebies. her preferences don't always make sense, like she will share lipstick not not deoderant...its more about an internal feeling of what makes her feel yucky and what doesn't.

Ya I am also like that- I would share lipstick but not actual clothing. That's too much germs all over lol. Unless the person is someone I know and clean.

[Joy]

I'm not even sure how Ne comes into play with me.

[Becca]

Does Si hidden agenda have to do with being overwhelmed and frustrated when people ask you to do a lot of things at once?

[Beautiful sky]

Does Si hidden agenda have to do with being overwhelmed and frustrated when people ask you to do a lot of things at once?

No although EIIfind it hard to be pulled frpm something they are working on already where I find that SEI can multitask easily

[The Martrix]

No although EIIfind it hard to be pulled frpm something they are working on already where I find that SEI can multitask easily

This is true. A process must be completed, before the next one is started.

From my experience of EIIs, there is a kind of compulsion to do a task, coupled with a resentment of having to do it. I was wondering where this stems from...

[Beautiful sky]

Does Si hidden agenda have to do with being overwhelmed and frustrated when people ask you to do a lot of things at once?

This is true. A process must be completed, before the next one is started.

From my experience of EIIs, there is a kind of compulsion to do a task, coupled with a resentment of having to do it. I was wondering where this stems from...

I agree with the process type conclusion that you've reached however I don't see that I've ever had resrntment for doing it as a mattter of fact because I'm an introvert and I strive to assert my self importance because I can't see myself well I often will brag about how much I did and the I the major I did it . I'm a lot more relaxed around LSE because they just focus on rational activity.

[The Martrix]

I agree with the process type conclusion that you've reached however I don't see that I've ever had resrntment for doing it as a mattter of fact because I'm an introvert and I strive to assert my self importance because I can't see myself well I often will brag about how much I did and the I the major I did it . I'm a lot more relaxed around LSE because they just focus on rational activity.

Ah. That's interesting. My EII sister says rational reassurance gives her security. She's E6.

[Becca]

No although EIIfind it hard to be pulled frpm something they are working on already where I find that SEI can multitask easily

This is true. A process must be completed, before the next one is started.

From my experience of EIIs, there is a kind of compulsion to do a task, coupled with a resentment of having to do it. I was wondering where this stems from...

This is what I was taking about. Sometimes, I feel a compulsion to do a task, and it will play with my head and force me to do it. And inside I'll feel resentment about it.

Maybe this is because of strong Fi needs of doing the right thing and Si needs of feeling overworked?

I agree with the process type conclusion that you've reached however I don't see that I've ever had resrntment for doing it as a mattter of fact because I'm an introvert and I strive to assert my self importance because I can't see myself well I often will brag about how much I did and the I the major I did it . I'm a lot more relaxed around LSE because they just focus on rational activity.

You have never been asked to complete a task that you found difficult, yet felt overworked and worthless while you were doing it?
Yes, I agree that LSE relax me because they consider if the work is rational. I NEVER feel the resentment/ stress that I get around SLEs and maybe SEEs

[Beautiful sky]

Does Si hidden agenda have to do with being overwhelmed and frustrated when people ask you to do a lot of things at once?

This is what I was taking about. Sometimes, I feel a compulsion to do a task, and it will play with my head and force me to do it. And inside I'll feel resentment about it.

Maybe this is because of strong Fi needs of doing the right thing and Si needs of feeling overworked?


You have never been asked to complete a task that you found difficult, yet felt overworked and worthless while you were doing it?
Yes, I agree that LSE relax me because they consider if the work is rational. I NEVER feel the resentment/ stress that I get around SLEs and maybe SEEs

No. But if I did I would ask permission to seek out sources of info or do that quietly. I would start calling professors and people I network with and get to someone who can help me. I'm very motivated by challenging work because the "I" wants to assert it's ability and importance and just like a lot of SLI as well will bite off more than they can chew. I've had the chance to learn more by theses challenges.

[Becca]

No. But if I did I would ask permission to seek out sources of info or do that quietly. I would start calling professors and people I network with and get to someone who can help me. I'm very motivated by challenging work because the "I" wants to assert it's ability and importance and just like a lot of SLI as well will bite off more than they can chew. I've had the chance to learn more by theses challenges.

Maybe the job I have is just not for me

[Iris]

Maybe the job I have is just not for me

It is terrible to feel stressed and overwhelmed at work. I hope you have some good experiences to balance the stressful moments.

Can you be specific about a situations that has made you feel overwhelmed?

[Becca]

It is terrible to feel stressed and overwhelmed at work. I hope you have some good experiences to balance the stressful moments.

Can you be specific about a situations that has made you feel overwhelmed?

Thank u.
I have to do a lot of repetitive mundane work. It is really not difficult; there is no challenge in it. I also have to do it very quickly. It leaves me little to no time to interact with people. I resent it, yet in the end I feel a little good for completing it. It also does not help that the person I work with is an SLE

[Beautiful sky]

Does Si hidden agenda have to do with being overwhelmed and frustrated when people ask you to do a lot of things at once?

Maybe the job I have is just not for me

Oh eeeeek I'm sorry to hear that. I hope things get better

[Beautiful sky]

Does Si hidden agenda have to do with being overwhelmed and frustrated when people ask you to do a lot of things at once?

Thank u.
I have to do a lot of repetitive mundane work. It is really not difficult; there is no challenge in it. I also have to do it very quickly. It leaves me little to no time to interact with people. I resent it, yet in the end I feel a little good for completing it. It also does not help that the person I work with is an SLE

You're easily bored? ( sorry for guessing your states :

[Becca]

You're easily bored? ( sorry for guessing your states :

Lol that's ok I guess so. I need more stimulation than doing simple tasks, and when I have to do them I get irritated. I wait till their over and try to do them the fastest way possible.

[Suz]

Does Si hidden agenda have to do with being overwhelmed and frustrated when people ask you to do a lot of things at once?

hmm, i relate to this a lot... i wonder if it relates to weak Te (and like you suggested, strong Fi and needing to do a decent job for people)

[Becca]

Does Si hidden agenda have to do with being overwhelmed and frustrated when people ask you to do a lot of things at once?

hmm, i relate to this a lot... i wonder if it relates to weak Te (and like you suggested, strong Fi and needing to do a decent job for people)

There's an IEE at my work who does have the same problem with the job, yet does not focus on it as much as I do. Meaning I get uptight every time the work is not done, while it does not seem to bother her. Maybe it's because she enjoys other aspects of the job and can focus on them more. I think this is because of the Ep and Ij differences.

Also, she doesn't work side by side with the SLE. She admits that if she did, she would be more stressed like me.

[Suz]

There's an IEE at my work who does have the same problem with the job, yet does not focus on it as much as I do. Meaning I get uptight every time the work is not done, while it does not seem to bother her. Maybe it's because she enjoys other aspects of the job and can focus on them more. I think this is because of the Ep and Ij differences.

Also, she doesn't work side by side with the SLE. She admits that if she did, she would be more stressed like me.

a few months ago i left a beta boss. My workload hasn't changed but i have never been as stressed out and overworked as I had been with him. My new group isn't beta (i think my new boss is EII, but still figuring that out), and i feel much less pressure and that i can focus more and get stuff done, and feel at least semi-healthy.

I'm really not sure why that beta boss had that effect on me... he may not have even intended it, but i just felt like working with him was a pressure cooker. Still, every time he emails me that feeling comes back (we are still collaborating on a project).

[Emmym]

I often either underestimate or overestimate my need for comfort. I'm far less focused on comfort than Si-egos and find I can be perfectly happy with much less or practically anything that meets certain criteria, but I can be finicky about certain things (for instance, certain foods I absolutely refuse to eat) and I have "staples" which I become reliant on in my everyday scheduled life. I might not fully appreciate these things, but losing them can leave me temporarily devastated even while I'm rolling my eyes at myself for caring so much. For example, I recently got drunk and broke a really nice pair of headphones I had gotten mere days ago, and I was depressed about it until I could order a new pair. Like, actually really sad.

There are certain things that just make me feel... gross and sad. Recently I spent some time with an EIE-Fe, stayed with her for a few days and her living habits... Let's just say she has pets. Messy, untrained pets. And some of their toys were actually repurposed sex toys. She angrily accused me of being prissy when I tried to get one of the cats to stop attacking my purse and biting the straps. Not much regard there for other people's things, but I'm not sure if that's relevant to Si-polr at all. I know an ESE-Fe who acts similarly.

I work out regularly but without too much intensity. It's as much about the routine as it is about the health benefits. I have passable knowledge about health and dieting and when I was younger I used to eagerly try to share that knowledge with others, but as I got older I realized I was being rude and started keeping it to myself. But I'm happy to listen and make suggestions if I think they'll help.

Last that comes to mind, I used to only wear black/grey until an IEE told me my wardrobe was "boring." I started branching out, and my clothing choices don't always work but they're not BAD, just not awesome. Not bad is all I care about.

Oh yeah, and I will not go near someone who has noticeable BO. Period.

[trifling nincompoop]

i have an experience i would like your opinions on about Si anyways i got into an argument with a lady while i was grooming my horse when she said i needed to press harder when i was brushing and i told her that it was unnecessary because you could see the dust flying off her fur

[Joy]

I'd use the horse's reaction and the finished product to determine the right pressure.

[Becca]

I often either underestimate or overestimate my need for comfort. I'm far less focused on comfort than Si-egos and find I can be perfectly happy with much less or practically anything that meets certain criteria, but I can be finicky about certain things (for instance, certain foods I absolutely refuse to eat) and I have "staples" which I become reliant on in my everyday scheduled life. I might not fully appreciate these things, but losing them can leave me temporarily devastated even while I'm rolling my eyes at myself for caring so much. For example, I recently got drunk and broke a really nice pair of headphones I had gotten mere days ago, and I was depressed about it until I could order a new pair. Like, actually really sad.

I can also be happy with less, for example, when I go away for a few days I pack all my things into a tiny bag so that I don't have to carry much. I read somewhere that this has to do with Ne creative- knowing the best way to fit things. And about keeping "staples" of things you need- If I forget something important such as my hair brush I get sulky because I don't know where I'll get one, and my pride does not like for me to borrow things.

 

it is interesting that my mother, ESTp, would always admonish me for not being able to ask for help. She said that people EXPECT you to ask them for things you need, and you should not be embarrassed. I always had a harder time asking someone for a favor because I do not like taking up space. This must be an example of Se base and PoLR working "together". Haha

There are certain things that just make me feel... gross and sad. Recently I spent some time with an EIE-Fe, stayed with her for a few days and her living habits... Let's just say she has pets. Messy, untrained pets. And some of their toys were actually repurposed sex toys. She angrily accused me of being prissy when I tried to get one of the cats to stop attacking my purse and biting the straps. Not much regard there for other people's things, but I'm not sure if that's relevant to Si-polr at all. I know an ESE-Fe who acts similarly.

Eww same. Sort of like my dislike for spiders. Probably Si PoLR. I know an ENTj who does not care too much about cleaning.

I work out regularly but without too much intensity. It's as much about the routine as it is about the health benefits. I have passable knowledge about health and dieting and when I was younger I used to eagerly try to share that knowledge with others, but as I got older I realized I was being rude and started keeping it to myself. But I'm happy to listen and make suggestions if I think they'll help.

Yes, I like working out too but I mostly walk a lot and rely on that for my exercise.

Last that comes to mind, I used to only wear black/grey until an IEE told me my wardrobe was "boring." I started branching out, and my clothing choices don't always work but they're not BAD, just not awesome. Not bad is all I care about.

Oh yeah, and I will not go near someone who has noticeable BO. Period.

I always cared about clothes, but somehow my wardrobe never had anything interesting. I still love going shopping and seeing nice things, but I'll only allow myself to buy a few important items.
Same.

[Becca]

I noticed that I put things away right after using them, and other types such as LSE and SLE do not do this as much as me.

[Beautiful sky]

I noticed that I put things away right after using them, and other types such as LSE and SLE do not do this as much as me.

Good morning how are you? Are you monologuing early in the morning?

[Emmym]

I can also be happy with less, for example, when I go away for a few days I pack all my things into a tiny bag so that I don't have to carry much. I read somewhere that this has to do with Ne creative- knowing the best way to fit things. And about keeping "staples" of things you need- If I forget something important such as my hair brush I get sulky because I don't know where I'll get one, and my pride does not like for me to borrow things.

 

it is interesting that my mother, ESTp, would always admonish me for not being able to ask for help. She said that people EXPECT you to ask them for things you need, and you should not be embarrassed. I always had a harder time asking someone for a favor because I do not like taking up space. This must be an example of Se base and PoLR working "together". Haha

Eww same. Sort of like my dislike for spiders. Probably Si PoLR. I know an ENTj who does not care too much about cleaning.


Yes, I like working out too but I mostly walk a lot and rely on that for my exercise.


I always cared about clothes, but somehow my wardrobe never had anything interesting. I still love going shopping and seeing nice things, but I'll only allow myself to buy a few important items.
Same.

Yeah, it's all about the 'staples' to keep me sane. I have coffee at pretty much the same time everyday, and even if I'm out and about or with other people, I'll grab some if we go somewhere that sells it. I don't actually mind asking for favors too much, but I hate feeling like I'm inconveniencing someone, so if they seem inconvenienced by it I won't ask. On the other hand, when I was staying with a friend who has an LSE mother, her mom kept lavishing me with gifts! Most of them I didn't need, but some I really appreciated. I find Fi-EIIs and Ti-LIIs to be more convinced of the importance of comfort, whereas I care far more about productivity (dat Te-DS, haha). But Si kind of anchors me to the real world while my Ne goes crazy. It's like a little refuge from the loud, chaotic world whenever I need a moment to remember what my plans are.

[trifling nincompoop]

i wiped my butt and got a little poop on it once i didnt wash my hands as usual just wiped it off does that make me SLE instead

[Satan]

i wiped my butt and got a little poop on it once i didnt wash my hands as usual just wiped it off does that make me SLE instead

i think that makes you sli.