What are you watching?

[Fluffy Princess Unicorn]

"Normally self-aware and empathetic, but during arguments lose sight of how they are hurting others because too caught up in how others are hurting them"
So, to the untrained eye, it seems like the F-A (becoming Secure) is being self-absorbed, basically. It's not selfishness, though...it's a trauma response.

[Fluffy Princess Unicorn]

[Fluffy Princess Unicorn]

Why you had 5 teeth pulled though? (I know it was a pun, I'm just... lol)

LOL it wasn't actually a pun, btw. I didn't even notice that until you pointed it out.

[Fluffy Princess Unicorn]

If God was a) all powerful, b) all knowing, and c) purely well-meaning, then how is it possible that the problems of famine, war, and other cruelties along a similar vein, all exist?

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Because people are on Earth, not paradise. They were expelled from paradise.

I think the idea is that the answer is nuanced and detailed.

The problem is like asking why someone does anything at all but you do not ever get told their thinking and have never met them. All you have to go by is either what they have directly said in the past or guesswork.

In the answer to your question, the Bible is our reference guide as it is supposed to be in some parts, God's exact words or words inspired to be written with His approval. And it states that the reason for any evil is because man was created with free will, and man's decision to go against a rule caused the evil to be brought into the physical existance of man.

Man lived in the garden of Eden which was a paradise and no evil was allowed to be physically manifested there. The decision by man to open the path to knowing good and evil resulted in being expelled from the garden into the rest of the world where that evil was allowed to flourish and man got to get his wish- to know good and evil. But that knowledge was experiential not just in a single event, it is throughout his existance within that realm. -As if man was a fish choosing to swim into a fish trap full of predator fish. We get to deal with the result of that choice until it gets rectified by the physics of God's structure and system of rule.

In order to understand "The Problem of Evil," you have to think about the backstory that's told in the Bible. God created all things, including Satan. If God created Satan (AKA the father of evil), that means a) God knew all that would happen, but did it anyway; b) God was powerful enough to stop it from happening, but didn't; and/or c) God was not entirely good, thus evil also came from him.

You can infer based on what's in the Bible that God planned for billions of people to go to hell before they ever even existed. If He didn't plan it, then He didn't know it would happen (and therefore is not all-knowing); if He did know, then He was not entirely good or well-meaning, as it means He created and used cruelty.

[Adam Strange]

“They miss you, but THEY AREN’T WILLING TO DO THE WORK…”
“They care about you, but NOT ENOUGH TO FULLY SHOW UP…”

So a lot of those times, I was right when I said, “you don't even care.” My friend didn't care enough. The conflict about this came from differing expectations. I expected more, while to him, the fact that he felt care was sufficient. Therefore, he felt like I was being too demanding (and for what he was ready for or willing to give, I was), while I felt like he didn't care enough (and he didn't, because he didn't care enough for his care to drive him into action…and that was what I was looking for: action).

When expectations are involved, it's often a matter of relativity and comparison.

I guess it was just an incompatibility between us. Not one that couldn't change, but it was one that existed between the two of us during the time we were together or friends.

My ex-wife tells me that she misses me and that she loves me, but yeah, she never shows up. Not that I want her to show up. I don't.

I think her being a Dismissive-Avoidant says a lot about how screwed up I was when I married her.

[Hawk]

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In order to understand "The Problem of Evil," you have to think about the backstory that's told in the Bible. God created all things, including Satan. If God created Satan (AKA the father of evil), that means a) God knew all that would happen, but did it anyway; b) God was powerful enough to stop it from happening, but didn't; and/or c) God was not entirely good, thus evil also came from him.

You can infer based on what's in the Bible that God planned for billions of people to go to hell before they ever even existed. If He didn't plan it, then He didn't know it would; if He did know, then He wasn't entirely good or well-meaning.

I plan for my offspring to lose a job or have rough times and need my assistance. Does that mean their decisions that led to it were created by me? Did I create their free will of downfall choice? Even for ethical things?

I am smart enough to impart wisdom counter to those choices but they are responsible for their actions and decisions.

That doesn't make me evil. It means they are responsible for themselves.

I offer grace to help but they have to accept it.

[Adam Strange]

---

In order to understand "The Problem of Evil," you have to think about the backstory that's told in the Bible. God created all things, including Satan. If God created Satan (AKA the father of evil), that means a) God knew all that would happen, but did it anyway; b) God was powerful enough to stop it from happening, but didn't; and/or c) God was not entirely good, thus evil also came from him. Basically, you can infer based on what's in the Bible that God planned for billions of people to go to hell before they ever even existed.

Lol. Explanations like these are what happens when you try to make sense out of a fable.

I was driving around the remote parts of Southern Ohio, looking for a dark sky location, and these only occur where there are no cities nearby. I followed a stream past a field of yellow flowers back between the hills, where it eventually led to a lake. Around the lake, in one of the most beautiful spots I've seen in a long time, were some burned out trailers and junk-strewn yards. In one of the yards was a sign that said

JESUS the only real HOPE for AMERICA

Well, if Jesus is the only real hope for America, America is pooched.

[Fluffy Princess Unicorn]

I plan for my offspring to lose a job or have rough times and need my assistance. Does that mean their decisions that led to it were created by me? Did I create their free will of downfall choice? Even for ethical things?

I am smart enough to impart wisdom counter to those choices but they are responsible for their actions and decisions.

That doesn't make me evil. It means they are responsible for themselves.

I offer grace to help but they have to accept it.

This is the logical fallacy called, “false comparison.” You're human, not God; you were (allegedly, for the sake of argument) created, not the creator. You aren't deciding whether or not to create evil. Furthermore, arguably, God is supposed to be pure, and you as a human are not—meaning, you really can't say that it's still good just because it's something you would do. Yet, with you being a human and a “sinner,” even you still do try to prevent bad things from happening to your child to the best of your ability. That's more than God did, despite having more power to stop it than you have.

Satan is the father of evil, yet, who created Satan? God. Therefore, Satan is merely a scapegoat. It's one of the reasons I think the Christian god is narcissistic as fuck: shifts blame for everything negative onto Satan so that He can appear to be the innocent/pure/good one. Also shifts blame onto people, making Him a victim. If you're not too fearful to think about it, though, you can understand that God is responsible for the existence of both according to the Bible, and is thus the true father of evil.

[Fluffy Princess Unicorn]

My ex-wife tells me that she misses me and that she loves me, but yeah, she never shows up. Not that I want her to show up. I don't.

I think her being a Dismissive-Avoidant says a lot about how screwed up I was when I married her.

Are you using “showing up” in a literal or a figurative sense here? The context doesn't make it clear.

[Adam Strange]

Are you using “showing up” in a literal or a figurative sense here?

Both. She never comes over and she never offers any support.

I only hear from her when she needs something. If it weren't for me preserving my own image of me as being a good person, I'd tell her to go find someone who still believes she is a nice person, because I don't.

[Hawk]

This is the logical fallacy called, “false comparison.” You're human, not God; you were (allegedly, for the sake of argument) created, not the creator. You aren't deciding whether or not to create evil. Furthermore, arguably, God is supposed to be pure, and you as a human are not—meaning, you really can't say that it's still good just because it's something you would do. Yet, with you being a human and a “sinner,” even you still do try to prevent bad things from happening to your child to the best of your ability. That's more than God did, despite having more power to stop it than you have.

Satan is the father of evil, yet, who created Satan? God. Therefore, Satan is merely a scapegoat. It's one of the reasons I think the Christian god is narcissistic as fuck: shifts blame for everything negative onto Satan so that He can appear to be the innocent/pure/good one. Also shifts blame onto people, making Him a victim. If you're not too fearful to think about it, though, you can understand that God is responsible for the existence of both according to the Bible, and is thus the true father of evil.

So it appears in the first paragraph the issue is the origin of good and evil. I'm stating it comes from choice. Free will is a tool. It's the most powerful one we have. Our choices determine our ethics and actions and then define us. Typically it's selfishness vs selflessness.

The second paragraph seems to pin blame. Blame is on an individual for their choices.

If I give someone who is homeless a $100 bill they can choose to buy a lot of food and live a while. Or they can buy some powerful drugs and end quickly. Am I then evil for giving them money? Am I good for giving them money? Neither. They have to choose how to use it.

I agree with you. God would be responsible for creating Satan and man both. Who made decisions to break rules and be selfish to surpass the rulemaker in authority?

In America it's treason.

In sports arguing with the umpire gets you thrown out.

Yelling at a parent can get you discipline.

I see no difference.

[Fluffy Princess Unicorn]

Both. She never comes over and she never offers any support.

I only hear from her when she needs something. If it weren't for me preserving my own image of me as being a good person, I'd tell her to go find someone who still believes she is a nice person, because I don't.

I see. In context, I kind of interpreted “showing up” in the video as actually speaking to you. Sort of like a lurker. Maybe it means what you said also, though. I'm not sure.

[Fluffy Princess Unicorn]

So it appears in the first paragraph the issue is the origin of good and evil. I'm stating it comes from choice. Free will is a tool. It's the most powerful one we have. Our choices determine our ethics and actions and then define us. Typically it's selfishness vs selflessness.

The second paragraph seems to pin blame. Blame is on an individual for their choices.

If I give someone who is homeless a $100 bill they can choose to buy a lot of food and live a while. Or they can buy some powerful drugs and end quickly. Am I then evil for giving them money? Am I good for giving them money? Neither. They have to choose how to use it.

I agree with you. God would be responsible for creating Satan and man both. Who made decisions to break rules and be selfish to surpass the rulemaker in authority?

In America it's treason.

In sports arguing with the umpire gets you thrown out.

Yelling at a parent can get you discipline.

I see no difference.

There are more points I could make to disprove this, plus excerpts that show God in the Bible actually doesn't even give us free will, but…agree to disagree, I suppose.

[Fluffy Princess Unicorn]

It's a common theme and pattern for dismissive-avoidants to leave the relationship prematurely—as in, without actually working on the problem. It's not because they don't care enough. Sometimes it can be that, but not usually. It's not because they're going, "oh, I don't care at all," it's because they feel a sense of learned helplessness around how to deal with different issues. They assume the worst because of painful past experiences that have colored their perception of events and how things go, and then they feel helpless to do anything. "It's not going to go well anyways, so it feels like my only option is to leave."

So, basically…I guess…they catastrophize about everything and feel helpless to prevent their own imagined outcomes.

It's easy to imagine an Enneagram 5 being this way. Pulling back, analyzing, over-analyzing, assuming the worst / catastrophizing, losing hope, quitting...because of not TAKING ACTION, which in this context is COMMUNICATING and trying to resolve problems...

[Adam Strange]

Hmm, I watched a bit of the video and this woman is batting 1000. I need to watch this whole series when I get some time, @Lady Leviathan.

Thanks for sharing them.

[godslave]

Ann Dowd is just outstanding in her Aunt Lydia interpretation. She's like Stanley Tucci, an unsung Hero !

[Ocean Man]

[Fluffy Princess Unicorn]

[Ocean Man]

[Ocean Man]

[Ocean Man]

"The power of love. Cow, forest and accordion." I'm inspired.

[Ocean Man]

[Ocean Man]

[Fluffy Princess Unicorn]

Hmm, I watched a bit of the video and this woman is batting 1000. I need to watch this whole series when I get some time, @Lady Leviathan.

Thanks for sharing them.

I think that's a wise decision.

I think studying more psychology in general would be wise for you to do. At times, I feel like I'm watching someone try to hammer something with a magnifying glass. Socionics can't explain everything, you need more tools. Sometimes, what you categorize as being Socionics related is actually more along the lines of attachment style, or some other thing that is part of some other psychology. Gaining more knowledge about psychology is more than likely the only way you're going to be able to see typology differently and prioritize it a little lower, thus assessing people and situations more accurately.

[Adam Strange]

I think that's a wise decision.

I think studying more psychology in general would be wise for you to do. At times, I feel like I'm watching someone try to hammer something with a magnifying glass. Socionics can't explain everything, you need more tools. Sometimes, what you categorize as being Socionics related is actually more along the lines of attachment style, or some other thing that is part of some other psychology. Gaining more knowledge about psychology is more than likely the only way you're going to be able to see typology differently and prioritize it a little lower, thus assessing people and situations more accurately.

I have recently been thinking that I need to know more about psychology, too. These issues seem to be the largest problems in my life right now.

[lookin4waifu]

I have recently been thinking that I need to know more about psychology, too. These issues seem to be the largest problems in my life right now.

Read some Piaget imo.

[Fluffy Princess Unicorn]

I have recently been thinking that I need to know more about psychology, too. These issues seem to be the largest problems in my life right now.

I recommend starting off with fundamentals rather than a specific person. Reading things out of curiosity is great, but when your goal is to be productive in self-improvement endeavors, you really want to aim for specific concepts that address immediate needs you have, not specific authors. Perhaps seeing a good therapist at the same time you're researching may be the best route, also.

[Ocean Man]

[Bethanyclaire]

Conversations with Friends- so far so good. ‘Nice guy’ LII seduces inexperienced EII..the show has a very naturalistic style so you feel like you’re a fly on the wall witnessing the relationship develop. There is tenderness but he is also displays very typical entitled male behaviour. It feels like a mini feminist master piece to me so far.

[Ocean Man]

[Ocean Man]

[Aquamarine]

[Ocean Man]

[Ocean Man]

[Ocean Man]

[Ocean Man]

[Ocean Man]

[Ocean Man]

[Ocean Man]

[ILoveChinchillas]