Helping an SEI ISFp lose weight

[consentingadult]

It doesn't sound like she wants to lose weight. Sorry, but it sounds like she's lying to you so you feel good. It doesn't sound like she's willing to change her exercise/eating habits at all, and doesn't want to change in general.

You can lead a horse to water, but...



I don't believe in trying to change people in relationships. Never seems to work. The solution is simple - if her weight is a minor thing to you, and you want to be with her, then you can try some of the suggestions others in this thread have made and live with it. If it's an issue that really bothers you, then break up with her and move on.

Also, if you plan on ever having kids with her, women usually weigh more after having kids than before. The weight problem will only get worse. I know from a couple in my own family actually - the husband wasn't happy with his wife's weight before they were married with kids, and after they had kids, he would start making fun of her weight with stupid, hurtful comments. It was very damaging to his wife. It led to a divorce.

Kids or not, this girl sounds like she's not going to change at all, or listen to any suggestions. Procrastination will only compound the problem. She'll likely get bigger. Probably won't try to lose weight unless she has a big reality check - a heart attack, breakup, or something else.



Also, your wording here is weird and stuck out to me. Are you sure losing weight is her personal goal? It doesn't sound like she cares. It sounds like it's a goal YOU are IMPOSING on HER. Are you able to appreciate this girl for who she is?

I'm sorry, but you are drawing completely wrong conclusions here, about the situation, my relationship and my involvement in her weight problems. They are so wrong, that I will not even bother to explain any further.

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

First, teach her that she's attractive no matter what size she is. People can have issues with that. It's silly though, a fat person can get me off if they are creative enough... (there's a personal limit kinda with me and you know everybody's shallow but that doesn't mean that it's 'right') Deal with the heartfelt emotional side. It's bs that the fashion industry thinks that we only fap to like perfect size 0s. *vomits*

Now for the technical side. I lost good weight on weight watchers tho u have to count points. It's a bit cumbersome, but technical detail is necessary if you actually want to be successful. I could lose weight again if I really wanted to, but I dislike how much mental energy and effort it took for me to do it. I seriously had to think about it ALL day - or it didn't get done. Dead serious. If I tried it any other way, like not think about it- the weight just wouldn't come off. It ain't 'hard' so much as it's cumbersome and just time consuming.

It's a tad more simple than people think. Your body doesn't care so much what you eat as how much u eat it and the density/calorie of it. It's just really easy to overeat not because people are 'emo' or some lame excuse commercialism uses to guilt trip people into buying books that they don't need, but because of how subtle and nuanced one little bite is. Just think about it, if you were like in a situation where your body needed food to live, one bite would be a miracle. So the body as a natural defense against the harsh cruel world makes one little bite go a long way.

And yeah if she's going to exercize (though the food part is more important) make sure it's something she really likes to do, if she can't find anything- just try walking with her. There was that story about that gamer dude that lost weight on a treadmill while playing world of warcraft. If she's a homebody type and doesn't like external stuff very much, get her to do that!